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Pilates in Balloch - Physio led

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Pilates in Balloch - Physio led

Small, friendly, non competitive classes taught by a Chartered Physiotherapist/Advanced Pilates Instructor. Maximum of 8/9 in each class.

Realistic Pilates enables clients to develop a healthy self-image, through the development of better posture, proper co-ordination, breathing and improved flexibility. Classes are taught by a Chartered Physiotherapist with over 30 years of experience working both in the NHS and Private Hospitals in a variety of clinical settings. A member of The Chartered Society of Physiotherapy and the Health Professionals Council, and has a Mat Pilates Level 3 Diploma in Mat Pilates (QCF)

Realistic Pilates teaches you how to align your body, isolate your core muscles, and use your muscles in the way they were designed to be used, rather than the way they have learned to be used, following injury or faulty patterns of movement. Realistic Pilates classes are suitable for all ages and level of ability, though more suited to beginner/improver level rather than an advanced level. Maximum class size is 8/9; mats, equipment, including stability balls are all provided. Email - lynne.pilates@hotmail.com

Classes taught by Chartered Physiotherapist and Advanced Pilates Instructor.

22/12/2025

A lovely message from one of my Tuesday morning clients…..
”Thank you Lynne for making the classes so varied and beneficial. I think we all appreciate the effort you put in to keep us moving! Happy Christmas to all. Xx”

13/12/2025

That’s us finished up for now for Christmas and New Year. Start back Tuesday 6th January.
Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and best wishes for the New Year. Look forward to seeing you in 2026 🎄🎅🥰

05/11/2025

It’s true 😂 combined with the moves we were doing last night in Pilates, and the amount of laughing, I had the best nights sleep for ages. 😂💪🏻🦵🏻😴🛌
And I’ve woken up looking 10 years younger 😅😊

03/11/2025

How can this be the last week of this four week block?
Where did October go?
Six more weeks of Pilates before Christmas 🎄 💪🏻🫣

11/10/2025

The older woman has decided to take up Pilates. She feels it would be good to put her socks on without creaking, bend down without needing help to get back up again, squat without farting and look behind her without spraining every muscle in her neck and shoulder.

She’s bought the mat and the cute, but completely ineffectual, head cushion - along with a brand new water bottle. She just knew that the kind of people doing Pilates would absolutely be the same people that carry around those mahoosive bottles with the encouraging messages down the side: dried up husk, slightly damp, it’s not wine you know, is your Tena big enough and congrats you’ve reached camel status…you’ve certainly got the toe.

Now…if they did bottles like this for gin, she’d absolutely get on board with the motivational nonsense.

She’s been going for a few weeks and has established ‘her spot’. Everyone in the class has ‘their spot’, and if someone new arrives it’s a race to get shoes off and mats flipped out before the newcomer can steal any of these sacred spots. There has been the odd occasion when she’s had to practically rugby tackle a newcomer as they attempted to roll out their mat in the back left, 3 rows down, spot. Her spot.

She likes being at the back, because once she’s laid on the mat she can grab a quick snooze while the instructor is at the other end of the room. She’s perfected the art of smiling while snoozing, so the instructor can’t be sure if she just has her eyes shut or if she is actually asleep - and doesn’t like to disturb her to ask.

The Pilates clientele are a mottly crew:

Mavis, who enters the hall bewildered in her 80s leg warmers and headband - then leaves in the same state. The older woman thinks Mavis has taken a wrong turn and actually meant to go to Zumba, but is too polite to say anything and is now stuck with stretching, deep breathing and balancing on one leg for the next 5 weeks.

Brenda, who runs in late every time. She’s clearly rushed in from work and hurriedly changed - because she’s tottering around in one stiletto and one trainer, while shoving an oat bar into her gob as she’s not had time to eat a meal.

Francesca, front and central, looks like she should have her own Pilates dvd. She’s bedecked in matching Lycra - from her pert little b***s down to her teeny tiny socked feet, via her unbelievably and annoyingly tight arse. The older woman hates her.

Last week the older woman walked in to find a new member, slap bang in the centre of the room - and apparently tied up in knots. She casually walked passed, while furtively glancing at him, and literally couldn’t work out which bit of leg went where. Show off.

She stopped short of gawping - while fighting the urge to go over and unravel him - then simply carried on over to her spot, flung out her mat with a flourish, laid on her back, pulled up her legs and…farted.

Supremacy had been re-established my friends…supremacy had been
re-established.

Never try to out ravel the older woman 😂

©️Midlife Dramas in Pyjamas

Please feel free to sh.a.re, li.ke and c.o.mm.ent

(If you like how I write, you might like my two books. Both same title as my page and both available on Amazon)

02/10/2025

Great week of classes. Hope you all liked the new moves with the purple balls, some more challenging than others 🤔👍💪🏻 Thank you for all the lovely feedback 🙂 xx

25/09/2025

Student Physios, The Wueen’s College Glasgow 1983.

18/09/2025

18 years of teaching Pilates! Some of my clients have been with me for 18 years.
Comment below how many years you have attending
🥰💪🏻🎉

01/09/2025

A change from dog walking, Pilates, dance attire 🎶🎭👗

26/08/2025

A nice relaxing class using the rollers, with some new moves thrown in.

17/08/2025

So who is all looking toward to the roller? 🤔😳😂
Classes start back this week, message sent to everyone with a couple of updates.

29/04/2025

Very colour coordinated with our small equipment this week 🙂👌

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Balloch

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Popular, friendly, well established (2007) Pilates classes in the West Dumbartonshire area. The classes are a modified form of Pilates, suitable for beginners/improvers and for clients of all ages.

Classes are taught by a Chartered Physiotherapist with over 30 years of experience working both in the NHS and Private Hospitals in a variety of clinical settings. A member of The Chartered Society of Physiotherapy and the Health Professionals Council, and has a Mat Pilates Level 3 Diploma in Mat Pilates (QCF)

Realistic Pilates teaches you how to align your body, isolate your core muscles, and use your muscles in the way they were designed to be used, rather than the way they have learned to be used, following injury or faulty patterns of movement.

Realistic Pilates enables clients to develop a healthy self-image, through the development of better posture, proper co-ordination, breathing and improved flexibility. Maximum class size is 10; mats, equipment, including stability balls are all provided. Classes taught by Chartered Physiotherapist and Advanced Pilates Instructor.