Lorna Knott Counselling and Psychotherapy

25/11/2025

At some point in our lives, we all face the loss of someone we love. A parent, relative, friend, or child. These moments change us forever.

There is no "right" way to grieve. Every person's journey through loss is different, and every feeling you experience is valid.

Cruse Scotland is here to walk alongside you. We provide professional and compassionate support to bereaved adults, children, and families throughout Scotland. We also provide training to help communities better support those who are grieving.

For more information and support: https://buff.ly/C73oIfZ

20/11/2025

Children find it hard to talk about s loss of a dear loved one as mostly they don’t even understand what is happening to them with new feelings and emotions. It can be so scary for them. This short film shows the benefits of support from professional counsellors who specialise in children and young people suffering from grief.

This is "In Their Own Words" by Bill Bruce on Vimeo, the home for high quality videos and the people who love them.

18/11/2025

It’s hard to know what to say when someone you know is suffering a bereavement but saying something, even just a few words to acknowledge their pain rather than nothing will help them feel supported. Saying “ this must be so hard for you” is ok and will have a deeper meaning than saying something like ‘let me know if there’s anything I can do”. They won’t ask, don’t be scared of keeping it real. They will appreciate it and thank you for it.

The Elephant In My Room

Every time I run into someone I haven’t seen in a while, and I happen to mention the person I lost, their face immediately changes.

You know that look, wide eyes, frozen smile, like they’ve just walked into an emotional minefield. Suddenly, they’re calculating what to say next, or silently wondering why on earth I’m still talking about it.

It’s funny, in a tragic sort of way, how quickly the mood shifts. One minute we’re chatting about the weather, and the next, boom, there’s an elephant in the room.

And let's be honest…that elephant is my grief.

If I say their name in a crowd, the air suddenly feels a little heavier. If I start to share my story, people start eyeing the exits. It’s not that they don’t care, it’s that grief makes people uncomfortable. They treat it like it’s contagious, as if one mention of my loss will get my sadness all over them.

Here’s the thing…for me, pretending what happened never happened isn’t an option.

How could it be?

To stop talking about someone I love so deeply would be like pretending they never existed, and I just won’t do that. That love, that loss, it shaped who I am.

What I wish, what I truly wish, is that people would stop skirting around the elephant. Ask me about them. Share a memory. Say their name out loud. It doesn’t hurt me to hear it; it hurts me more when I don’t hear it.

And here’s where the story takes a turn: I learned that elephants are actually compassionate, fiercely protective, and they mourn their dead. They even visit the bones of loved ones. They grieve in their own quiet, tender way.

So maybe the elephant in the room isn’t just my grief, maybe it’s also me. Big-hearted, a little clumsy at times, and just doing my best to carry both love and loss with me.

And maybe the only people who truly see me…are the ones who have their own elephants.

Gary Sturgis – Surviving Grief

09/11/2025

04/11/2025

Instead of saying, "I know what it feels like", let's say "I cannot imagine your heartbreak".

Instead of saying, "You're strong, you'll get through this, let's say " You'll hurt, and I'll be here.

Instead of saying, "You look like you're doing well, Let's say, "How are you holding up today?"

Instead of saying, "Healing takes time", let's say "Healing has no timeline".

Instead of saying, "Everything happens for a reason, let's say "This must feel so terribly senseless right now".

And when there are no words to say at all, you don't need to try and find some. Love speaks in silences too.

~ 'Words' by Ullie-Kaye

~ Art by Jennifer Yoswa

01/11/2025

Sharing a link here for a Scottish listening service called Breathing Space which is for anyone in Scotland over the age of 16 who is feeling low, anxious and depressed. There is also web chat if you’d prefer this to talking on the phone. This service is doing amazing work in our communities. There is someone here already to listen and support if you are able to reach out.

https://www.breathingspace.scot/

31/10/2025

When You Don't Have Time, Pause

In this busy world
you may not feel you have time to slow down.
Hours rush past,
a blur of noise and tasks,
and you tell yourself
that rest can wait.

When your thoughts are tangled,
when your breath feels shallow,
when the day presses hard against you,
pause.
When you don't have time, that's when you need it most, pause.

Even for a few moments.
Let your shoulders drop,
unclench your jaw,
and listen
to the quiet that still lives
beneath the noise.

You don’t have to step away for long.
Start with a single breath,
a sip of something warm.
Notice the morning light
filtering through the trees outside.
Feel the soft weight of a blanket
around your shoulders.
Simply be,
right here, right now.

These small pauses are enough.
They remind you
that life isn’t only about doing, achieving, or moving forward.
It’s about being,
breathing,
returning to yourself.

Slowing down
doesn’t mean falling behind.
It means meeting the day with presence,
carrying quiet steadiness
into everything you do.

Even a few moments
can reset the world inside you,
letting calm bloom quietly,
patiently,
in the simplicity of this moment.

~ 'Whe You Don't Have Time, Pause' by Spirit of a Hippie

✍️ Mary Anne Byrne

~ Art by Heather Stillufsen

20/10/2025

We will all suffer from grief at some point in our lives and it’s not always the loss of a person we love. There are so many angles to loss during our lives and in the picture below it shows how it can affect all of us.

The pain caused by loss is grief. The only happens if we have an attachment to the person, place, situation. Bereavement is a specific type of loss but there are many other ways we suffer from loss and don’t realise that it is a form of grief and a human response to loss.

16/10/2025

16/10/2025

Even though you think it feels safer, standing still will never feel or be the right time to do anything to improve your life.

When life feels predictable, we experience less stress and anxiety because we know what to expect. When life doesn’t feel predictable, and we are uncertain about what might be around the next corner, we feel stressed and anxious.

If the change is brought about by forces outside of our control, whether the death of a loved one, a pandemic, losing a job or an accident, we feel disempowered and experience a loss of control.

Talking it through with a qualified counsellor can help you develop a sense of clarity about what might happen next when we pursue changes in our live or have no choice about the change, it help alleviate the fear.

It's hard, but I'm built to handle it.

10/10/2025

Today I said “I’m fine”, not once
But five times altogether
When people asked “how are you?”
Then made small talk of the weather

And so I hid behind my mask
The one I’d worn a while
I set in place my bravest face
And dressed it with a smile

And that was how the day went
All “I’m fine” and talk of rain
Until somebody asked me how I was
Then asked again

They asked if I was truly fine
And I said I was not
And they said they were sorry
That they couldn’t do a lot

But then they sat beside me
Whilst I spoke the truth at last
They listened and they held me
As the tears slipped through my mask

And where before, I’d felt I should
Maintain this brave façade,
I realised there was much to gain
By letting down my guard

See, though my load was still the same
It now was not as heavy
‘Cause sitting and offloading it
Had helped a bit already

Today they asked “how are you?”
And I told them I was fine
‘Til someone saw behind the mask
And asked me one more time

And though they may have felt
That there was little they could do
They’ll never know how much it meant
To tell someone the truth

*******

Tomorrow is World Mental Health Day - so, this is your reminder that talking to someone can help ###

Becky Hemsley 2022
Artwork by the very talented

“I’m fine” is from my second collection: https://amzn.to/487AuTn
(affiliate link)