Self in Mind

Self in Mind BABCP accredited CBT Therapist with 12+ years' experience helping people overcome anxiety, depression & low self-esteem, specialising in ADHD.

Self in Mind offers a warm, supportive space to create real change.

✨ CBT vs Coaching for ADHD – what’s the difference?Living with ADHD can feel like juggling spaghetti. Messy. Slippery. H...
22/07/2025

✨ CBT vs Coaching for ADHD – what’s the difference?

Living with ADHD can feel like juggling spaghetti. Messy. Slippery. Hard to keep in the air.

So when you’re ready for support, should you go for CBT or ADHD coaching?

🔍 CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) helps you understand how your thoughts, feelings and actions feed into each other.
It’s great for tackling procrastination, overwhelm, anxiety, low mood and that “never good enough” feeling.
It gives you practical tools to break unhelpful cycles and build self-belief.

🚀 ADHD coaching is more about doing.
It’s future-focused, helping you create systems that suit your brain.
Time management, planning, realistic goals, accountability – all the scaffolding to help you follow through.
Less on emotions, more on action.

Many people find they need a bit of both.
Because everyone’s different, and your support should be too.

Feeling stuck or overwhelmed? Therapy, coaching (or both) could help. You don’t have to do it alone.

Come as you are. Messy, distracted, doing your best – you’re welcome here.

Not sure what’s right for you? 💭
Drop a comment or DM, I’ll help you find what’s best for you.

Struggling to get things done? It’s not because you’re lazy. It’s because your brain needs the right conditions to take ...
18/07/2025

Struggling to get things done? It’s not because you’re lazy. It’s because your brain needs the right conditions to take action.

There are four key factors that make us more likely to do something:

Urgency - there’s a reason to do it now

Interest - it matters to you or sparks your curiosity

Challenge - it stretches you just enough to stay engaged

Novelty - it feels new or different in some way

If a task ticks one or more of these boxes, you’re far more likely to get it done. If it doesn’t, procrastination creeps in. That’s not a character flaw, it’s how the brain works – especially if you’re managing ADHD, anxiety, low mood or stress.

So if you’re staring at your to-do list and nothing is moving, try this:
Look at one task and ask yourself, how can I make this feel a bit more urgent, interesting, challenging or novel?

You don’t need to force yourself. You need to work with your brain, not against it.

Come as you are. Progress is possible.

15/07/2025

Ever had one of those days?
When your brain says: “Let’s be productive!”... but reality looks a little different. 👇

🛏️ Hit snooze instead of reading emails.
🥤 Popped out for a can of Coke... ended up browsing the bread aisle.
📱 Fought the urge to scroll between sessions.
🧠 Planned to write, read or do art after work... but somehow ended up on the sofa.
⏰ Finally doing the washing up at midnight – instead of winding down at 10.30pm like I said I would.

This is life with ADHD (or life when you’re overwhelmed, burnt out or low on executive function).
Intentions? Gold star. ⭐️
Follow through? A bit more complicated.

👉 It’s not laziness.
👉 It’s not lack of effort.
👉 It’s a brain that works a little differently – and sometimes that means days like this.

If this sounds familiar, you are not alone. And more importantly – you are not broken.
Together, we can find strategies that work with your brain, not against it.

✨ Progress isn’t perfect productivity – it’s finding ways to move forward, one doable step at a time.

Come as you are – and let’s start from there. 💛

Feeling stuck in these cycles? Let’s chat – my DMs are open

You might have ADHD if…🧠 You walk into a room and immediately forget why you went in.📝 You buy a fantastic new planner… ...
11/07/2025

You might have ADHD if…

🧠 You walk into a room and immediately forget why you went in.

📝 You buy a fantastic new planner… but forget to use it.

⏰ You set alarms to remind you of other alarms.

💬 You re-read the same paragraph three times because your brain went on its own little adventure.

📦 You order all the organisational tools… but they’re still sitting in the box.

📚 You hyperfocus on an interest so deeply you forget to eat, sleep or reply to that message from 3 days ago (oops).

Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

Living with ADHD can feel like a constant tug-of-war between your ideas, energy and intentions. And while it’s often frustrating, it’s also understandable – your brain is wired differently, and that’s okay.

With the right support – practical CBT strategies, ADHD-friendly tools, a non-judgemental space to explore what works for you – change is possible. You can build systems that help (instead of fight against) your brain. You can feel more in control, less overwhelmed and more like you.

Ready to take the first step? I’d love to help – DM or follow the link in bio to learn more.

Ever feel like your emotions go from 0 to 100 — fast — and then won’t settle?That’s not being dramatic. It’s called emot...
09/07/2025

Ever feel like your emotions go from 0 to 100 — fast — and then won’t settle?

That’s not being dramatic. It’s called emotional dysregulation, and it’s very common in ADHD.

💡 Why?
ADHD impacts areas of the brain like the prefrontal cortex (regulation) and amygdala (emotion). So emotions hit hard and regulation takes longer. It’s not overreacting — it’s a lag in response.

You might notice:
– Intense overwhelm
– Shame spirals after reacting
– Rejection sensitivity
– Feeling like emotions are “too much”

🛠 What helps?
✔️ Name it out loud – “I feel angry/sad/anxious”
✔️ CBT check-ins – “What triggered this?”
✔️ Pause & label – “This is frustration”
✔️ Sensory grounding – cold water, movement, texture

✔️ Useful distraction - talk about something else, do something you enjoy that requires your attention

Emotional regulation is learnable. You're not broken — you're navigating a different brain.

🪴 Save this for when it’s tough. You’re not alone — and support can help.

Your first session is all about understanding you.There’s no pressure to prepare or present your life story. Some people...
04/07/2025

Your first session is all about understanding you.

There’s no pressure to prepare or present your life story. Some people bring notes, others just show up and we figure it out together – either way is completely fine.

We’ll explore what’s brought you here, what you’d like help with and how life is feeling right now. You can share at your own pace – there’s no rush and no pressure to open up about everything straight away.

As part of the initial assessment, I’ll ask some standard questions – about your mental health history, current wellbeing and daily life – so I can get a fuller picture of your experience.

We’ll also start thinking about your goals for therapy – what you’d like to work on and the kind of change that would feel meaningful for you.

And I’ll introduce you to CBT: what it is, how it works and how it can support you with challenges like ADHD, anxiety, low mood, self-esteem, stress and more.

The first session is a safe, supportive space where you can simply come as you are – no judgement, no pressure.

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed or unsure where to begin – this is a gentle first step. We’ll take it at your pace.

💬 Ready to get started? Just send me a message – I’d love to help.

ADHD & task paralysis: What’s really going on?Ever sat staring at your to-do list, completely frozen, knowing what needs...
01/07/2025

ADHD & task paralysis: What’s really going on?

Ever sat staring at your to-do list, completely frozen, knowing what needs doing, but unable to start?

That’s not laziness. That’s not lack of discipline.
It’s task paralysis – and if you’re living with ADHD, it’s a brain-based experience.

Here’s what’s happening under the surface:

🧠 Executive functioning challenges – The ADHD brain can struggle with getting started, planning ahead, organising tasks and managing time – all part of ‘executive functions’. This can make initiating a task feel almost impossible.

🧠 Prefrontal cortex overload – Too many choices, no clear starting point, and your brain’s planning centre hits gridlock. You want to begin… but can’t work out how.

🧠 Amygdala activation – Cue overwhelm. The pressure to “just do it” triggers a stress response that leads to shutdown. You’re not ignoring the task – your nervous system is protecting you from perceived threat.

🧠 Low dopamine levels – The ADHD brain struggles to get enough of the “reward” signal that helps us start and complete tasks. Even simple things can feel like climbing a mountain in flip flops.

So what can help?

✨ Break it into tiny steps – Smaller than you think it “should” be. Even “open the document” counts.

⏱️ Use a timer or the ‘just 5 minutes’ rule – Taking off the pressure can help shift you from freeze to flow.

💡 Understand your motivation – ADHD brains engage better when something feels interesting, challenging, novel or urgent. One strategy? Intentionally schedule tasks for when they’ll feel more urgent, and use smaller prep steps beforehand.

💬 Compassionate self-talk > self-criticism – You’re not broken. You’re navigating a brain that works differently – it deserves understanding, not blame.

You don’t need to “try harder”. You need support that works for your brain.

Come as you are… overwhelmed, unsure, stuck. You’re not alone.

Ready to explore support for ADHD, anxiety or low self-esteem? Get in touch 📩

CBT for ADHD isn’t about making you more “disciplined” it’s about making things actually work for your brain.Standard CB...
27/06/2025

CBT for ADHD isn’t about making you more “disciplined” it’s about making things actually work for your brain.

Standard CBT focuses on unpicking unhelpful thoughts, managing big emotions and changing stuck patterns. It’s solid stuff – but if you’ve got ADHD, it often needs tweaking.

Because honestly?
🧠 Remembering to pause and reflect mid-meltdown?
🧠 Writing a step-by-step plan when your brain thrives on chaos and last-minute pressure?
🧠 Sitting still with your thoughts when your head’s already sprinting ahead?

That’s not going to cut it.

CBT for ADHD adapts the tools so they’re actually usable, especially when executive function is all over the place.

Here’s how it looks in practice:
✔️ Visual prompts and external reminders (because out of sight = out of mind)
✔️ Tiny, dopamine-friendly goals that don’t feel impossible to start
✔️ Tools that support planning without expecting perfection
✔️ Challenging shame and self-criticism, not just thoughts
✔️ Focusing on what’s realistic for your energy, not what “should” be
✔️ Building self-compassion, so you’re not constantly feeling behind

It’s still CBT – just with more flexibility, more understanding, and no pressure to be someone you’re not.

You don’t have to be more together, more organised or more ready. You just have to show up as you are.

💬 Tried CBT before? Or thought it wouldn’t work for you? I’d love to hear your experience, drop me a comment.

Or if you're curious what this could look like for you, send me a message. No pressure, no judgement – just come as you are.

A note to the overthinker considering therapy…You’ve been circling the idea for a while now.Maybe you’ve got 12 tabs ope...
24/06/2025

A note to the overthinker considering therapy…

You’ve been circling the idea for a while now.
Maybe you’ve got 12 tabs open about CBT.
Maybe you’ve drafted the email… and never hit send.
Maybe you’re waiting to “feel worse” so it feels valid.

Let’s clear something up:
Struggling doesn’t have to be loud to be real.

You’re not overreacting, and you’re certainly not failing.
You’re coping _ just in a way that’s exhausting you.

Maybe you’re stuck in a loop of overthinking, second-guessing, beating yourself up for not “doing better”.
Maybe your brain is bouncing between 100 tabs while your body just wants to lie down.
Maybe it’s all just... too much, too often.

That doesn’t mean you’re broken… it means you’re burnt out.
That doesn’t mean you’re lazy… it means you’re tired from trying to hold it all together on your own.

Therapy, especially CBT, can help you:
– make sense of the mental noise
– quiet the inner critic
– build tools that actually work for you, not some one-size-fits-all list of “shoulds”
– feel more in control (even when life isn’t)

If you’ve been waiting for a sign – this is it.
You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need a starting point.

Come as you are, we’ll begin there.

It’s not about trying harder. It’s about having the right support.If you’re constantly telling yourself, “I just need to...
20/06/2025

It’s not about trying harder. It’s about having the right support.

If you’re constantly telling yourself, “I just need to be more disciplined” or “Why can’t I get it together like everyone else?” – please know this:

You are not lazy.
You are not broken.
You are not failing.

You are navigating a world that isn’t always built with your brain in mind – and you’ve likely been doing it without the support, strategies or compassion you actually need to thrive.

Whether you’re managing ADHD, low mood, anxiety or just a nagging sense that life feels harder than it should, CBT can help. Not by telling you to “try harder” – but by helping you understand how your thoughts, feelings and behaviours interact, and giving you practical tools to make meaningful, lasting change.

This is a space where you don’t have to pretend, mask, or perform.
You’re welcome to come exactly as you are – messy mornings, missed deadlines, mind racing or stuck on pause.

There’s nothing “wrong” with you.
There’s just a better way forward, one that meets you where you are.

And you don’t have to do it alone.

Have you ever felt like you’re constantly falling short, even when you’re doing your best? I’d love to hear from you – share below or reach out if this resonates💬

Not every therapy tool lands… especially if you’re neurodivergent, overwhelmed, or just tired of being told to “just be ...
17/06/2025

Not every therapy tool lands… especially if you’re neurodivergent, overwhelmed, or just tired of being told to “just be more organised” (thanks but no thanks).

These tools? They’re the ones my clients come back to. Because they’re practical, flexible and built for real life, not textbook perfection.

🧠 1. Self-awareness as a strategy
Before you do anything, you’ve got to know how your brain works. What triggers you. What throws you off. What times of day feel impossible. The better you understand your patterns, the more ahead of them you can get – instead of constantly firefighting.
This is the tool that makes every other tool work better.

📋 2. Visible, external systems
Phone reminders. Post-it notes. A weekly planner that actually gets used. ADHD and anxiety often mean mental overload – so the less you rely on memory, the more capacity you create. Systems don’t make you boring. They give you breathing space.

🎯 3. Low-pressure behavioural experiments
Forget the all-or-nothing approach. We test things. “What’s the smallest step I can try this week to see if it helps?” That way, we learn what works for you – not what works in theory.

💬 4. Interrupting the shame spiral
You know the script: “Why am I like this?” “Everyone else manages.” We create short, repeatable phrases that help you pause and reframe, like:
“It’s OK to find this hard.”
“This doesn’t mean I’ve failed.”
Kindness isn’t weakness, it’s how we move forward.

📆 5. Weekly check-ins, not big plans
We don’t aim for a perfect week. We ask: What worked? What didn’t? What do I need now? Regular, realistic check-ins build consistency – without guilt.

Self-awareness isn’t fluffy, it’s your most powerful tool. Because once you know how your brain actually works, you can build tools that fit (not fight) your wiring💡

You don’t need to be “better”. You need a system that gets you.

Which of these feels like a game-changer — or one you wish you’d learned sooner?

Let’s talk in the comments or share it with someone who needs this today.

Fighting it doesn’t make ADHD go away… it just makes you more exhausted.There’s a quiet kind of power in saying, “This i...
13/06/2025

Fighting it doesn’t make ADHD go away… it just makes you more exhausted.

There’s a quiet kind of power in saying, “This is hard for me.”
Not as a defeat. Not as an excuse.
But as an honest start.

If you live with ADHD, you’ve probably spent years masking, pushing through, or comparing yourself to people who seem to “manage just fine.” But ADHD isn’t a character flaw. It’s a different way of experiencing the world. And no amount of self-blame or perfectionism will change your wiring.

What will help?
✅ Self-acceptance
✅ Tailored strategies
✅ And permission to stop battling yourself

You’re allowed to say, “This just isn’t my strength.”
You’re allowed to ask for support.
You’re allowed to adapt life to work for you – not the other way around.

That’s not giving up. That’s getting smart.
That’s what growth looks like.

So if today’s not tidy, focused or productive, you’re not broken. You’re navigating your brain. And that takes more strength than people realise.

🌱 Come as you are. That’s where the real work begins.

💬 What’s one ADHD trait you’ve been trying to ‘fix’ that actually just needs understanding? Let’s start normalising it.

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