Resilient Mind Therapies

08/05/2026

Have you ever had a thought pop into your head out of nowhere and immediately wondered: wait, did that actually happen?

Not a clear memory. Not something you went looking for. Just a fragment, an image, a feeling that stays and refuses to leave.

For people with false memory OCD, that moment of doubt doesn't pass. It spirals. The more you try to work out whether something really happened, the less certain you feel. And the fact that you can't just dismiss it starts to feel like proof that something is wrong.

It isn't. But when you're in the middle of it, that is incredibly hard to believe.

We've written a new blog on false memory OCD: what it is, why it feels so real, and how therapy can help. If this resonates with you, or you've been searching for something that finally puts words to what you're experiencing, it might be worth a read.

Read the blog here: https://resilientmindtherapies.co.uk/blog

And if you have any questions, feel free to drop them here or send a message.

07/05/2026

If someone you love has OCD, you already know how hard it is to watch.
You want to help. You want to say the right thing. And when they're distressed the most natural response in the world is to reassure them. To tell them everything is fine. That they're a good person. That the door is definitely locked. That the thought doesn't mean anything.

It comes from love. And that matters.

But reassurance is one of the things that keeps OCD going, even when it's given with the best intentions. Every time it's offered, OCD learns that the doubt was serious enough to need an answer. So it comes back with another question. And the person asking feels briefly better but never actually settled. Because OCD will always find another question. That's how it works.

This isn't about blame. Nobody gets a manual for supporting someone with OCD and the things that feel helpful in the moment often feel like the obvious, caring thing to do. That's what makes it so genuinely difficult.

There are also things that don't help even when they come from a good place. Telling someone to just stop thinking about it. Pointing out that they've already checked. Asking why they can't just let it go. These things are said out of frustration, not a lack of care. But for someone with OCD they act as confirmation that nobody really understands what's happening. And OCD is already an isolating enough experience without that.

What actually helps looks different. Acknowledging that what they're feeling is real and distressing even if the threat isn't. Not engaging with the content of the OCD thought itself. Being consistent, because OCD thrives on inconsistency. Encouraging professional support without pressure.

One of the hardest things about supporting someone with OCD is sitting with their distress without trying to fix it. Staying present without solving it. Saying "I can see this is really hard right now" rather than reaching for an answer that OCD will only find a way around.

And it's worth saying clearly that supporting someone with OCD is hard. It asks a lot of the people who love them. Getting support for yourself alongside supporting them is not something to feel guilty about. It's important.

If you're finding it difficult to support someone with OCD and want to understand more about how to help, feel free to get in touch.

04/05/2026

OCD is one of the most misunderstood mental health conditions there is. And that misunderstanding has a very real cost.

Most people have a picture in their head of what OCD looks like. Checking. Cleaning. Liking things symmetrical. And while those things can be part of it for some people, they represent a very narrow slice of what OCD actually is.

For a lot of people OCD looks nothing like that.
It looks like being unable to stop thinking about whether you might harm someone you love, even though the thought is completely at odds with who you are. It looks like spending hours every day questioning whether your relationship is real or whether your feelings are genuine. It looks like being consumed by doubt about your own morality or your own character in a way that never fully settles no matter how much you think it through.

The common thread running through all of it isn't tidiness or a preference for order. It's doubt. Doubt that feels urgent and personal and impossible to put down.

Here's why the misunderstanding matters so much. When people don't recognise what they're experiencing as OCD, they don't seek help for it. They assume they're just anxious, or overthinking, or struggling in a way that doesn't have a name. They manage it alone, often for years.

Research suggests it takes an average of over 12 years for someone with OCD to get the right diagnosis and treatment. A lot of that delay comes down to people not recognising their experience in the way OCD gets talked about publicly. And when they do finally open up about it they're sometimes told to just stop thinking about it, or that everyone gets thoughts like that, or that they don't seem like someone with OCD.

Those responses don't come from a bad place. But they do make it harder for people to keep asking for help.

OCD responds well to the right treatment. But getting there starts with people understanding what it actually looks like, in all the forms it takes, not just the ones that get talked about most.

If this helps someone understand OCD a little more accurately, feel free to share it.

30/04/2026

OCD gets used casually in conversation more than most people realise.

"I'm so OCD about my desk being tidy." "I like things a certain way, I'm a bit OCD." "Everyone's a little bit OCD aren't they."
It's usually said without any intention to cause harm. But it does cause harm. Just not in an obvious way.
OCD is not a preference for tidiness. It's not a tendency to double check things or a liking for organisation. It's not something you can be a little bit of. And it's not a personality trait.

For someone actually living with OCD it looks completely different from what those casual comments suggest. It's hours lost every day to thoughts that won't let go no matter how hard you try. It's avoiding holding your own baby because a thought appeared that terrified you and you don't know what it means. It's checking the door so many times you're late for work and still not feeling certain when you get there. It's googling the same question for the fourth time today and still not feeling settled. It's cancelling plans because leaving the house feels impossible and you don't know how to explain that to anyone.

It's also the shame. The very specific shame that comes from not being able to explain what's happening in your own head to the people around you. From worrying that if anyone knew the content of your thoughts they would see you completely differently. From wondering whether what you're experiencing is serious enough to deserve help.

That last part is where casual language does its most damage. When OCD gets treated as something small and relatable, the people actually living with it start to question whether their experience is a genuine problem or an overreaction. They stay quiet. They don't seek help. They carry it alone for longer than they should have to.

OCD is a serious mental health condition. It is also one of the most treatable ones when people get the right support. But getting there starts with people believing their experience is real enough to deserve it.
Words shape what people believe is possible for them. That's worth remembering.

Feel free to share this if you think it might help someone understand what OCD actually is.

30/04/2026

This article is worth a read. The stories reflect so much of what I see in therapy sessions with clients. The gap between how OCD is portrayed and how it actually feels to live with it is considerable, and that gap stops people from recognising what they are going through and reaching out for help.

Obsessive, intrusive thoughts can paralyse sufferers with anxiety, fear, disgust or shame - and many will not realise the images they are experiencing in their head are due to OCD.
Full story - https://bbc.in/3QunH6G

29/04/2026

I wrote a guest blog for fellow therapist Sarah at Cosway CBT on something clients sometimes wonder but rarely ask out loud: Do therapists actually think about you after the session is over? My honest answer is in the link if you're curious.

Our latest guest post, from the lovely Kerry at Resilient Mind Therapies, asks:

"Do therapists think about their clients after sessions end?"

It is a candid look at the emotional echoes that can last beyond the final appointment and what it means for your care.

Read it here: https://www.coswaycbt.co.uk/post/do-therapists-think-about-clients-after-sessions-end

27/04/2026

When an OCD thought shows up the instinct is to do something about it. Figure it out. Check. Seek reassurance. Try to think your way out of it. Get rid of the feeling as quickly as possible.

But that response, however logical it feels in the moment, is what teaches your brain that the thought was worth responding to. And that's what keeps the cycle going.

These six things are based on Inference Based CBT and they won't make OCD disappear overnight. But they can start to change the way you relate to the thought when it shows up.

The first is simply to name what's happening. Not "something is wrong with me" or "I can't cope with this." Just: this is OCD. This is the doubt talking. That small shift in language creates a bit of distance between you and the thought and that distance matters more than it sounds.

The second is to notice the story rather than just the thought. The thought itself probably lasted less than a second. What OCD built around it, the meaning, the consequences, the version of events your mind constructed, that's where the real work is happening. See if you can notice where the thought ended and the story began.

The third is to ask yourself what the evidence actually is. Not whether something is possible, because OCD will always find a way to say yes. But what is actually in front of you right now. What do you actually know rather than what are you imagining. There's usually much less there than the feeling suggests.

The fourth is to notice the thread without pulling it. OCD will always offer you something to follow. A memory to check. A feeling to analyse. A what if to explore. You don't have to follow it. Noticing it's there without acting on it is one of the most valuable things you can practise.

The fifth is to sit with the uncertainty without trying to resolve it. This is genuinely difficult. But the goal isn't to feel certain. It's to let the uncertainty be there without chasing it. Because chasing certainty is what keeps OCD going, not the thought itself.

The sixth is to remind yourself who is doing the talking. OCD is very good at sounding like your own voice. Like your conscience. Like genuine concern. But the urgency, that feeling that something must be dealt with right now, that's OCD. Not you.

These take practise and they won't work perfectly straight away. But every time you respond differently to the thought you are showing your brain something new. And that's where things start to change.

If this is useful feel free to share it with someone who might need it.

25/04/2026

No visible rituals. Nothing anyone around you would notice.

Just thoughts that keep coming back, no matter how many times you try to push them away or reason your way out of them.

This is what Pure O OCD can look like. And it is one of the most commonly missed presentations of OCD there is.

The compulsions are not absent. They are just invisible. Replaying situations to check whether you said or did something wrong. Arguing internally with a thought to prove it is not true. Searching for certainty that never quite settles.

If any of this sounds familiar, the new blog post is for you. It covers what Pure O actually is, why the compulsions are so hard to spot, and what treatment looks like when the struggle is mostly internal.

Link to the blog in the comments

23/04/2026

This is what contamination OCD can sound like from the inside.

Not the textbook version. The real version. The one where you pour a drink away just in case. Where you stand for two hours because someone sat in your chair. Where you hold your breath when someone gets too close and hope they don't notice.

It's not about being a clean freak. It's an exhausting, relentless negotiation with your own mind. Every single day.

If this sounds familiar, it's worth knowing this isn't just how life has to be. It is treatable and people do get better.
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22/04/2026

If you recognised yourself in any of those thoughts, you're not broken and you're not alone in this. OCD is one of the most misunderstood mental health conditions there is. It's also treatable. If this resonated with your experience feel free to share it with someone who needs to see it.

20/04/2026

Most people think OCD is about scary thoughts. But the thought is just the starting point.

What OCD actually does is take that thought and build an identity around it. A version of you that it says the thought belongs to. And then it asks the question that keeps so many people stuck.
"What if this is actually who I am?"

For some people that looks like having a thought about harming their loved one or friend and within seconds their mind has already decided what it means. Not just that the thought appeared but that the thought says something fundamental about who they are as a person. Whether they can be trusted around the people they care about the most.

For others it shows up around contamination. A moment of contact with something they believe is contaminated and OCD tells them that a truly responsible person wouldn't have let that happen. That they're a risk to the people around them. That something is fundamentally wrong with the way they think.

Or it's a thought that felt wrong about a child. And just like that their mind had already decided what it meant about them. Whether they can be trusted. Whether they are who they thought they were.
This is what Inference Based CBT calls the feared possible self. A version of you that OCD constructs from thoughts, feelings and possibilities. It feels real because it feels close. Like it's just one thought away from becoming true.

But here's what's actually true. The thoughts that disturb you the most are almost always the furthest from who you actually are. The fear of harming someone exists because harming someone is completely incompatible with your values. The terror of being a certain kind of person exists because being that person is unthinkable to you.

OCD targets what matters most to you. It takes your values and uses them to build something frightening.

That version of you is not real. It never was.

If this resonates with something you've been carrying, feel free to share it with someone who might need to read it.