Lynne Mendelsohn Counselling

11/01/2021

Well, here we are in week two of this new year. If you are still feeling weary from last year, you are not alone. The chances are, that you may still be looking back on the last 12 months, with a whole raft of mixed feelings about it all. Probably relief that it’s over.
With the vaccine roll-out underway perhaps you are now feeling a glimmer of hope for some return to normality. To help you keep that glimmer alive, I am offering you a short visualisation where you will discover a gift especially for you for the year ahead and for this exceptional time we are all going through. Let me know how you get on…..and what your gift is.

11/01/2021

08/11/2020

Well, a light has truly gone out with the passing of Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks. Not sure if this is the right place to say this, however he was such an extraordinary man and an inspiration. It is fitting that today is Remembrance Sunday, he will be remembered by so many. One of his quotes seems appropriate:

“Technology gives us power, but it does not and it cannot tell us how to use that power. Thanks to technology, we can instantly communicate across the world, but it still doesn’t help us know what to say."

01/09/2020

Lifeline

At the request of a friend….

“The next several weeks are going to be the killer for many people who have lost their income, homes and are starving. There have been many suicides. I think of the man who walked dogs for a living in the Sea Point area who hung himself out of pure desperation and hunger.

Please never give up. The mental health issues related to lockdown and the pandemic are especially hard for people with depression.

Lifeline’s number is: 0861 322 322.”

01/08/2020

On behalf of a friend.....if you believe in regenerating nature, the countryside and ourselves, then please see the link below:

Tell the chancellor you want a green and fair recovery

16/07/2020

Meditation? Yes, it works…for me

Like many of us during this enforced period of lockdown I have been slowly re-shifting my day…. or at least my mornings to adapt to my new circumstances. Pre-lockdown I would go for an early morning gym session then proceed to work. Now, I begin my day with a workout.

In addition, I have encouraged myself to also begin my day with a morning meditation. After numerous attempts over the years I have found something that works for me. My sincere thanks to a student at the University of Brighton who suggested I try the 21 Day Abundance Meditation challenge offered by Deepak Chopra.

These meditations are uplifting and easy to engage with even if, like me, you are new to meditation. He includes an introduction and intention for the day and begins and ends the 3-minute meditation with a soft bell. His voice is wonderfully soothing and creates a good atmosphere for meditation. I can happily recommend browsing his videos on YouTube or visiting: https://chopracentermeditation.com/store.

Let me know how you get on.

Meditate with Deepak & J Balvin for

06/07/2020

Who am I? Why do I do the things I do?

Possibly questions you may have been asking yourself during lockdown when you weren’t busy attending Zoom team meetings or trying to home school your reluctant children…

I was reminded recently of the 16 personalities test – based on the theory proposed by Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung who suggested that people experience the world using four principal psychological functions – sensation, intuition, feeling, and thinking – and that one of these four functions is dominant for a person most of the time.

I took the test and I come out as an INFJ-T personality – apparently perfectly suited to do counselling work (a relief for both myself and my clients).

So, what personality type are you? Surprised or relieved?

Take our Personality Test and get a “freakishly accurate” description of who you are and why you do things the way you do.

28/06/2020

Talk to Us
1st – 31st July 2020

A couple of weeks ago I commented on the stories of loss that some people have experienced during this time of lockdown. Some of the things people are grieving about are loss of job, financial anxiety, worry about loved ones, fears for the future.

Some are experiencing all sorts of feelings including a loss of hope, loneliness or despair and these feelings can sometimes turn into suicidal thoughts.

You might like to know that The Samaritans are holding their annual Talk To Us awareness-raising campaign during July. Throughout the month they will be encouraging people to become better listeners by sharing expert tips on how to be a better listener.

Do you know of anyone who is currently feeling overwhelmed or suicidal? If so, then please guide them to the Samaritans helpline and website:

Samaritans works to make sure there’s always someone there for anyone who needs someone. Read more.

22/06/2020

OK, hands up any of you out there who are actually enjoying the benefits of lockdown?

Or, as the country (and the rest of the world) is slowly beginning to open up and get back to what we regard as normal – are you getting increasingly anxious about this?

If you have been working from home during this pandemic, you and your work colleagues have been feeling the social effects of remote working. You may have had to adjust to being on a profusion of video and phone calls throughout the day. Has this been comforting or invasive? Perhaps it all comes down to whether you are inherently extrovert or introvert by nature?

Extroverts are people who get energised by being around other people. They seek out opportunities to engage others and thrive when working with others, at least compared to introverts. In a more extreme form, they may be uncomfortable being alone for any length of time.

During this pandemic extroverts have been deprived of the physical presence of their colleagues. There have been no offices to visit, no informal chats in the kitchen or regular face-face meetings, Being deprived of those face-to-face connections with others is a real loss for extroverts.

Living alone during this time can be a real hardship. They may have had no physical contact with another person, unless they go to a shop or go for a walk. They may have been deprived of something that, for them, is emotionally akin to food. Video chats and phone calls are unlikely to provide the same energy boost.

Extroverts who live with others have had the advantage of the physical presence of others, but depending on who those people are (e.g., children, sick relative, or friend or partner who is out of work or having a difficult time), the boost may have been offset by juggling the demands of work and the demands of home

Introverts are energised by being alone. That's how they recharge. At work they seek out quiet places to work alone. Interacting with people all day, as in a typical workplace, can be exhausting.

During this pandemic introverts may initially have found that working from home has been a relief, a reprieve from the more frequent interactions in a typical workplace, particularly in an open-plan office. However, working from home may have also brought new challenges for introverts. Too many daily video and telephone calls may have felt intrusive or even overwhelming.

Introverts who live with others during this time may have also found that challenging. It may have been difficult to get real alone time, particularly if they are on numerous video calls, or if they live in a space that doesn't provide much opportunity to be alone.

Introverts enjoy some limited types of social interaction, but once they've had enough social time, they're ready to leave. Now, the enforced lockdown has meant they have had to continue to engage —such as a day full of video meetings for work. It's worth noting that introversion is different from shyness, in which conflicted individuals want social interaction but also are anxious about such interactions. Introverts have no such conflict.

Most people are neither extremely introverted nor extroverted. They are somewhere in between.

What is the solution given that this situation may go on for the long haul? What do both managers and employees need to think about? Perhaps we all need to consider where we are on the extrovert \ introvert spectrum and to pace ourselves accordingly. According to Tunji Oki, Ph.D., an industrial/organizational psychologist who thinks that "with the influx of stress that extroverts and introverts are facing during this time due to work-related adjustments or personal situations, and the inability for employees to take true vacations, managers should be more transparent about allowing their employees to take paid 'mental health' days as needed to maintain their productivity level."

Whether paid “mental health” days are feasible or not, we will all need to continue to take care of ourselves and our mental wellbeing for the foreseeable future.

PS I am an introvert….who has welcomed regular (limited) video calls with my colleagues.

16/06/2020

Today, as with most days during lockdown I turn to the BBC News website to catch a glimpse of the main stories.

As you know over the past weeks, months virtually every story whether in the UK or the wider world is related to the pandemic in some shape or form. As we slowly come out of the lockdown the current focus is on shops opening their doors (and subsequent queuing for 3 hours) and life as we know it beginning to re-emerge. However, I am also reminded of those stories of loss – of jobs, security, identity, loved ones and the list goes on.

Who or where can we turn to in times of grief and loss? Who do we get our support and understanding from? For many people this will be family and friends – for others it may be a trusted counsellor.

The following article offers more information and advice which I hope you will find helpful:

Grief is a normal human experience, but the COVID-19 pandemic has upended many of the ways we usually manage loss. Explore ways to cope with grief.

11/06/2020

How is your sleep? I have noticed that since lockdown I have felt restless, mind whirring away, my sleep interrupted.

Apparently, I am not alone.

More than half the UK population has struggled with sleep during the lockdown, a survey suggests. This study was carried out in May by market research company Ipsos MORI and King’s College London.

The researchers said, “lack of sleep may itself have had knock-on effects on people's capacity to be resilient during the pandemic, and there are signs of a disproportionate impact on particular groups: women, younger people and those facing financial difficulties.”

It was also shown that “nearly two-thirds of the public reported some negative impact on their sleep, showing just how unsettling the pandemic and lockdown measures have been.”

Experts have advised keeping to a routine, not taking naps and trying to get some exercise outside.

I was recently introduced to an app called Insight Timer which offers a huge variety of meditations to help with sleep, anxiety and stress. Lots of choice – there will be one that hopefully will help you….and it is free:

https://insighttimer.com/

31/05/2020

Kindness? How are you doing?

Although Mental Health Awareness Week, with its theme of kindness has passed…I just want to check in with you as to how you are doing on the kindness front? Are you being kind to yourself? Are others being kind to you? Recently Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks spoke of kindness and that “it doesn’t matter whether we are the giver or the recipient, lifting others we ourselves are lifted.”

Here are some tips from the Mental Health Foundation which I hope you will find helpful in your quest to keeping safe and keeping well and continuing to be kind.

Learn how kind acts can help you and others during the coronavirus outbreak.