14/05/2023
This is where I'm at right now
I've been neglecting myself and my training, and my injuries have regressed.
So these 4kgs are where I'm at. Until I get stronger again.
But for many people with an injury, this humbling feeling is something that hits you hard.
More than an injury, it can hit your identity.
"I'm Tom. I'm way stronger than this"
"I can straddle planche"
"I can do freestanding handstand push ups"
"This isn't me"
Yup. I do have an ego as well. Everyone has some kind of ego. It's not always a bad thing.
Today, I was looking in the gym at others pushing, and that felt a million miles away.
This is something that unfortunately happened a lot when I was dancing.
Then comes the throw away comments from others
"Why aren't you pushing?"
"Can't you just do a little bit?"
"You'll just have to train other stuff"
"Have you tried.......(insert thing that won't work)?
Cue Inner monologue:
Motha-f*cka!
Don't you think I tried that sh*t?
This is my passion
This is my dream
This is who I am.
If those worked, I would have done it already. I'm not that lazy.
But they don't mean anything by it, so you just end the conversation politely.
Only to be left with something that cuts pretty deep. That feels insulting to your character.
And the injury is still there.
So today, I fortunately know how to get over this setback, but it is still painful when it happens. And I see this same pain with those I help get out of this state.
I was wondering whether to post this. It doesn't help your injury heal any faster. But sometimes it feels good to connect with people who have gone through this experience.
Take care. This isn't the end of you.
