The Therapeutic Triad

13/05/2026

Behind Every Trigger Is a Younger Version of You Asking to Feel Safe

Behind every emotional trigger is often a younger version of ourselves asking one simple question: “Am I safe, loved, and accepted?”

As children, we experience the world emotionally before we understand it cognitively.

When love feels inconsistent, criticism becomes frequent, or emotional safety is missing, we can develop deeply rooted beliefs about ourselves that quietly follow us into adulthood.

Many adults are not reacting only to the present moment — they are reacting to unresolved emotional experiences from the past.

This can be especially true for women with ADHD, who often grow up feeling misunderstood, “too sensitive,” or not good enough.

Over time, repeated experiences of rejection, correction, or emotional invalidation can create intense rejection sensitivity and shame-based coping patterns.

Therapy helps us develop self-awareness, understand our emotional responses, and reconnect with the parts of ourselves that learned to survive instead of feeling safe.

Healing does not mean becoming someone new.

It means learning that we can finally feel safe being ourselves.

If you’ve ever wondered why rejection feels so painful, my latest blog explores this deeply.

05/05/2026

05/05/2026

Stop Waiting to Be Happy: Why Purpose Alone Will Never Save You

In my work, I meet many people who feel stuck in a state of unhappiness.

Not just feeling it—but living in it.

And when I ask a simple question:
“What would happiness look like for you?”

Most people pause.
They don’t know.

Not because they don’t want happiness—
but because they’ve never truly defined it.

We often confuse being happy with having a purpose.

So we say things like:

“I’ll be happy when I can travel”
“I’ll be happy when I feel secure”
“I’ll be happy when life falls into place”
But those are conditions.
Not states of being.

Happiness isn’t something you have.
It’s something you experience—in moments, in presence, in small shifts.

I often see this shift happen in conversation:

“I want to travel the world.”
→ “Where exactly?”
→ “I haven’t thought about it…”
→ “Maybe Italy… I’ve always wanted to go.”

And then the key question:
“What feels possible right now?”

That’s where things start to move.

Not in big, dramatic changes—
but in small, realistic steps.

For some, this journey is even more complex.

Especially for women navigating ADHD traits, where years of misunderstanding can turn into deep, internalised beliefs of “not enough” or “too much.”

But here’s something worth holding onto:

Just because others didn’t understand you,
doesn’t mean you have to keep seeing yourself through that lens.

There is space to be curious about yourself—
not as something to fix, but something to understand.

Purpose can help.
It can give direction, meaning, even moments of joy.

But it won’t “save” you.

Because happiness isn’t at the end of the journey—
it’s in how you relate to yourself along the way.

So instead of asking:
“How do I become happy?”

Try asking:
“What would feeling just a little bit better look like right now?”

And:
“What feels possible?”

This is where therapy can play a meaningful role.

Not as a quick fix—but as a safe space where you can begin to explore yourself, understand your patterns, and gently learn how to align your internal world with the external one.

If this resonates with you, I’ve written more about this in my latest blog.

👉 You can read it here: www.therapeutictriad.com/stop-waiting-to-be-happy-purpose-vs-being

Be kind to yourself 💎

30/04/2026

When Productivity Hurts: Rethinking Success for Women challenged by ADHD traits

“I feel like a failure.”
“I missed my deadlines.”
“Everything feels too much.”
“I have to be productive.”

These aren’t rare statements in my work with women challenged by ADHD traits.
They’re the norm.

And here’s the part that often gets missed:
It’s not really about productivity.
It’s about what productivity means.

For many women, it’s never just “getting things done.”
It becomes:
→ Proof that you’re good enough
→ Proof that you can be accepted
→ Proof that you deserve to belong

So when your energy dips…
When your focus disappears…
When your plan falls apart…
It doesn’t feel like a bad day.
It feels like you are the problem.

But the truth is—most productivity advice ignores something essential:

Your capacity.
You are not a machine.

You need:
• Rest (not just sleep, but mental and emotional space)
• Nourishment
• Flexibility

Yet so many women plan their lives as if none of that matters.

And when reality doesn’t match the plan, the inner critic gets louder.
“What’s wrong with me?”
Nothing is “wrong.”
You’ve just been measuring yourself against expectations that don’t account for how your brain actually works.

When you start to shift that:
✔️ by planning around your energy, not just your time…
✔️ breaking tasks smaller, softer, more realistic…
✔️ allowing flexibility instead of trying to push harder…

Something changes.
Things feel lighter.
More doable.
Less like a constant uphill battle.

And that voice that says “I’m failing” slowly quiets.

Because maybe success isn’t about pushing harder.
Maybe it’s about working with yourself instead of against yourself.

If productivity has ever made you question your worth—
It’s time to rethink what success actually means.

If this resonates, you can read more on my website.

Be kind to yourself 💎

28/04/2026

ADHD in Women: The Hyperfocus Trap

ADHD in women often looks like overperforming, not distraction.

You might:
✔ Hyperfocus for hours
✔ Ignore basic needs
✔ Crash afterward
✔ Struggle with consistency

That’s the hyperfocus cycle:
Overwhelm → Urgency → Intense focus → Burnout → Guilt → Repeat 🔁

It can look like productivity—but it’s not sustainable.

💡 What might help:
• Start small, break down the projects into feasible tasks
• Create a structure suitable for you (timers, check-ins)
• Plan around your energy, not just time

ADHD isn’t always “can’t focus.”
Sometimes, it can look like "can’t stop".

24/04/2026

One step at a time💎

23/04/2026

“I wish I could step out of my own mind… just for one day.”

From the outside, she had it together.
Inside, it felt like constant pressure she couldn’t escape.

“I’m too much.”
“I always mess things up.”
“If I slow down, everything will fall apart.”

Not just thoughts—
patterns that echo through everything.

✨ Tension
✨ Shame
✨ Overwhelm

“I feel trapped in a version of me I don’t know how to escape.”

This is something many women with ADHD quietly carry.

Not a lack of strength—
but a mind under strain.

And when this is understood…
The trap becomes loose.

21/04/2026

How ADHD fuels self-criticism—discover how to quiet the voice of shame.

Many of the women I work with don’t come to therapy saying, “I have ADHD.”

They come saying:

“I’m exhausted from overthinking everything.”
“I am a failure! feel like I’m constantly failing at things everyone else finds easy.”
“My brain is working against me—and I don’t know how to stop it."

What often sits underneath this is undiagnosed or late-diagnosed ADHD—and years of internalised self-criticism.

When your brain works differently, but the world expects you to function the same as everyone else, it’s easy to assume the problem is you.

Over time, that becomes an inner voice:
“I’m lazy.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“I should be able to do this.”

But ADHD is not a lack of effort.

It’s a difference in regulation—attention, emotion, nervous system.

And self-criticism? It’s often a learned survival strategy, not a truth.

In therapy, I see what happens when women begin to understand this:

The “I’m broken” narrative softens
Shame begins to lift
Compassion replaces criticism
Sustainable ways of working with their brain start to emerge

This is where real change happens—not through pushing harder, but through understanding more deeply.

You’re not alone—and you’re not the "problem".

If this resonates with you, I explore this more deeply in my latest blog on my website.

21/04/2026

How ADHD fuels self-criticism—discover how to quiet the voice of shame.

Many of the women I work with don’t come to therapy saying, “I have ADHD.”

They come saying:

“I’m exhausted from overthinking everything.”

“I am a failure! feel like I’m constantly failing at things everyone else finds easy.”

“My brain is working against me—and I don’t know how to stop it."

What often sits underneath this is undiagnosed or late-diagnosed ADHD—and years of internalised self-criticism.

When your brain works differently, but the world expects you to function the same as everyone else, it’s easy to assume the problem is you.

Over time, that becomes an inner voice:
“I’m lazy.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“I should be able to do this.”

But ADHD is not a lack of effort.

It’s a difference in regulation—attention, emotion, nervous system.

And self-criticism? It’s often a learned survival strategy, not a truth.

In therapy, I see what happens when women begin to understand this:

The “I’m broken” narrative softens
Shame begins to lift
Compassion replaces criticism
Sustainable ways of working with their brain start to emerge

This is where real change happens—not through pushing harder, but through understanding more deeply.

You’re not alone—and you’re not the "problem".

If this resonates with you, I explore this more deeply in my latest blog on my website.