JW Mind and Body Wellness

08/01/2026

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Word of the Week: Masking

This week’s word is masking.

What is it?

Masking is the process of hiding, suppressing, or altering natural responses, behaviours, or needs in order to fit in, stay safe, or avoid negative judgement.

For many neurodivergent people, masking isn’t a conscious choice. It’s a learned survival response. Over time, the brain learns which parts of itself are “acceptable” and which are not, and adjusts accordingly.

Masking can look like copying others, forcing eye contact, rehearsing conversations, suppressing stimming, staying quiet, or pushing through when something feels overwhelming.

How does it affect those with difficulties with it?

Masking can be incredibly costly.

It may look like:

• appearing “fine” at school or work, then collapsing at home
• extreme exhaustion after social interaction
• anxiety, low mood, or burnout
• difficulty identifying needs or emotions
• people not believing support is needed because things look OK

Masking uses a huge amount of cognitive and emotional energy. Over time, that constant self-monitoring can lead to burnout, shutdown, or a complete loss of sense of self.

Masking is not confidence.
It’s not resilience.
It’s effort.

How can I help?

You help by making masking less necessary.

That might mean:

• accepting differences without comment or correction
• not praising children or adults for “coping so well” without checking the cost
• offering choices rather than expectations
• allowing people to opt out, stim, move, or be quiet
• believing someone when they say they’re struggling, even if it’s not visible

Safety reduces masking.
Acceptance reduces masking.
Understanding reduces masking.

When people don’t have to perform, they can focus their energy on learning, connecting, and being themselves.

Emma
The Autistic SENCo
♾️

22/12/2025

19/12/2025

JOYFUL MINDS
There are books you read, and there are books that quietly read you back. This one entered my space through sound, through voice, through pauses that felt intentional. Somewhere between a long drive and a reflective moment, Gabor Maté’s calm, almost fatherly tone, carried by Daniel Maté’s sensitive narration, began to peel back layers I did not know I had. This was not just listening, it felt like being gently guided into truths the body has been trying to say all along.

1. The body keeps a record the mind tries to erase: One of the strongest messages that stayed with me is that the body does not forget what the mind chooses to suppress. Gabor Maté shows again and again that when emotions like anger, grief, fear, or resentment are pushed aside in the name of being strong, polite, or good, the body quietly absorbs the burden. Over time, it speaks through illness. Listening to the audiobook, the stories of patients made this impossible to ignore. Disease is not always an enemy attacking us, sometimes it is the body’s honest response to years of emotional silencing. This lesson challenged me to stop seeing sickness as random and start seeing it as meaningful communication.

2. Saying yes too often can cost the body dearly: The author repeatedly connects chronic illness with people who are overly nice, self sacrificing, and unable to say no. As I listened, I could almost hear the compassion in his voice for those who learned early in life that love was conditional. Maté explains that when we constantly abandon ourselves to meet the needs of others, stress hormones stay activated, weakening the immune system over time. This lesson landed deeply because it reframes people pleasing as not just a personality trait, but a serious health risk. The body pays the price for every boundary we fail to set.

3. Childhood is where stress quietly takes root: One of the most sobering lessons from the book is how early life experiences shape adult health. Gabor Maté does not accuse parents, instead he invites understanding. Through the narration, it became clear that children adapt in order to survive emotionally. They suppress anger, deny needs, and disconnect from feelings to maintain attachment. Decades later, the body remembers what the child could not express. This lesson helped me see that healing is not about blame, but about recognizing patterns that started long before we had language for them.

4. Stress is not always loud, sometimes it is polite and smiling: The book expands the definition of stress beyond trauma and crisis. Maté explains that hidden stress includes emotional repression, constant self control, and the pressure to appear fine when one is not. Listening to the audiobook, his gentle emphasis made this point even more powerful. Stress is not only what happens to us, but what happens inside us when we deny our truth. This lesson reminded me that calm appearances can hide intense inner tension, and the body eventually exposes what the voice refuses to say.

5. Healing begins with awareness not force: Rather than offering quick fixes, the author emphasizes awareness, compassion, and authenticity. As I listened, there was a noticeable softness in the narration whenever healing was discussed. The body does not heal through pressure, it heals through safety. Recognizing emotional patterns, reconnecting with feelings, and learning self compassion are presented as essential steps. This lesson taught me that recovery is not about fighting the body, but about finally listening to it with honesty and patience.

6. Authenticity is a biological necessity: Perhaps the most profound lesson from the book is that being true to oneself is not a luxury, it is a requirement for health. Maté makes it clear that when we disconnect from our true emotions and needs, the nervous system remains in survival mode. Over time, this imbalance shows up physically. Hearing this through the audiobook made it feel deeply personal. Authenticity is not just about emotional freedom, it is about survival. The body thrives when the self is allowed to exist fully and truthfully.

Book/Audiobook: https://amzn.to/49nDiL9

You can access the audiobook when you register on the Audible platform using the l!nk above.

16/12/2025

Gift cards available to treat a loved one this christmas 🎄 😍
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P.S based in Carway.

Happy Christmas everyone one 😊

14/11/2025

The first thing that drew me to Help Me, I’m Stuck was the title itself. It felt like a whisper straight to my heart during one of those silent moments when life feels as though it’s pressing pause on you. I remember scrolling through audiobooks and pausing when I heard Alexander Burns’ voice. There was something about his calm, grounded tone that didn’t just read the words, it lived them. Every sentence carried a quiet conviction that made Vaughn Carter’s message sink deep into me. It wasn’t just an audiobook, it felt like a personal conversation with someone who had seen the same walls I’d hit and had found a way to climb over them. By the time I reached the second chapter, I knew this wasn’t just another self-help guide. It was an invitation to finally stop circling my fears and start facing them.

1. Self-sabotage hides behind familiar comfort. Vaughn Carter helped me realize that sometimes what feels like “safety” is really self-sabotage in disguise. The way he explained how the mind clings to patterns that no longer serve us made me stop and reflect on my daily habits. He said it’s easier to stay stuck than to face the discomfort of growth, and I felt that truth deeply. This lesson can help anyone recognize that progress begins the moment we stop defending our limitations. The key is not to fight the fear but to understand what it’s trying to protect us from.

2. The stories we tell ourselves shape our future. The author’s insight into personal narratives hit me hard. He described how people repeat the same emotional storylines until they choose to rewrite them. I realized how often I replay old failures in my mind, almost as if rehearsing them makes me safer from disappointment. His voice carried warmth and clarity as he emphasized that transformation begins when we stop saying, “That’s just who I am.” It reminded me that we are not our past stories, and anyone who truly listens to this message can begin crafting new endings for old beginnings.

3. Discipline is an act of self-respect. Carter’s tone shifted slightly when he spoke about discipline, and it felt intentional, almost fatherly. He made it clear that self-discipline is not punishment, it is love in motion. Listening to that, I thought about the times I labeled my own inconsistency as “lack of motivation” when in truth, I had not learned to keep promises to myself. This lesson is for everyone who struggles with self-trust. When you stay consistent with your values, your confidence slowly rebuilds itself from the inside.

4. Your environment reflects your internal state. This part felt especially vivid as Burns narrated with an almost visual rhythm. Carter talked about how clutter, chaos, and distractions are not just external—they mirror the noise within us. I looked around my own space and saw truth staring back at me. He encouraged listeners to clear both their surroundings and their minds, reminding us that we cannot invite clarity into a life that has no space for it. Whoever takes this seriously will discover how peace outside helps strengthen peace inside.

5. Gratitude interrupts negative spirals. There was something soothing in the way Carter linked gratitude to emotional balance. He didn’t present it as a cliché but as a deliberate practice that rewires the brain’s response to difficulty. I found myself pausing the audiobook to breathe and list small things I was thankful for. It shifted something inside me. Gratitude, he explained, is not denial of pain—it is a reminder of strength that already exists within. Anyone struggling with anxiety or frustration can use this tool to restore calm and perspective.

6. Progress is messy, but movement is sacred. This was one of my favorite moments. Carter said progress doesn’t always look like confidence, sometimes it looks like trembling hands doing the right thing anyway. I could almost hear a smile in Burns’ voice as he narrated those words. It reminded me that we don’t have to be perfect to move forward, we just have to move. This lesson invites anyone who feels stuck to redefine success, not as arriving, but as continuing.

7. The right mindset creates freedom. The final chapters wrapped everything in a powerful circle. Carter emphasized that freedom is not the absence of obstacles but the mastery of our reactions to them. That line stayed with me. He showed that when we shift our mindset from “Why me” to “What can I learn,” everything changes. Listening to his voice close with warmth and reassurance left me feeling lighter, as though a door I didn’t know was locked had quietly opened. For anyone searching for clarity, this book offers not just motivation but genuine transformation, spoken with compassion and wisdom that you can feel long after the final chapter fades.

Book/Audiobook: https://amzn.to/4hXp2fJ

You can access the audiobook when you register on the Audible platform using the l!nk above.

06/11/2025

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16/10/2025

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06/10/2025

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Our modern, busy lives are often stressful and full of challenges. Through the practice of meditation we can learn to develop peaceful minds that help us cope with this stress and to become happier and more fulfilled.