Therapy with Tom

19/10/2025

Why do so many men wait until they're at breaking point?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. In my practice here in Medway, I see it week after week—men who've been carrying things alone for months, sometimes years, before they finally reach out.

There's something about how we're raised, isn't there? That voice that says "deal with it," "don't burden anyone," "you should be stronger than this."
I've written something about this—not as an expert looking down, but as someone who's sat with men going through it, and who's had his own struggles with asking for help. It's about what actually stops men from reaching out, what happens when they finally do, and why therapy doesn't have to feel like admitting defeat.

If you're someone who's been wondering whether therapy might help, or if you know a man who's been struggling quietly, maybe give it a read. Sometimes just knowing other people get it makes a difference.

Link in comments.

11/06/2025

Trauma isn’t always loud.
It doesn’t always come from one big, terrible event.
Sometimes it builds slowly — in homes that were emotionally cold, in workplaces where your efforts went unseen, in relationships that made you doubt yourself.

It’s the kind of pain that’s easy to dismiss. Even easier to carry alone.

This new article explores subtle, ongoing trauma: how it shapes us, how it hides, and how healing can begin.

You don’t need a diagnosis. You don’t need the perfect story.
You just need to feel the truth of your own experience — and let that be enough.

👉 Read the full piece:

Trauma isn’t always loud. Explore how subtle, chronic wounds can shape adult life — and how healing begins with recognition, not diagnosis.

27/05/2025

🧠 Ever tried a mental health app? Used ChatGPT when you felt stuck?

You're not alone — and you’re not wrong to be curious. More people are turning to tech to feel better, but the question remains: does it actually help?

In this article, I look at:
💬 The tools clients talk about most
📱 What’s useful vs. what’s hype
👣 How to explore tech without pressure

Therapy isn’t about doing more. It’s about finding what fits — and letting the rest go.

📖 Read here:

Not all mental health tools are created equal. A Medway-based therapist explores what digital tools support therapy — and what just gets in the way.