29/12/2025
Having horses when you’re neurodivergent is basically running a a very high budget wellbeing retreat for yourself without realising it. 🐴🧠
You thought you were buying a horse.
What you actually bought was an external hard drive for your nervous system.
• Routine?
People love to say horses thrive on routine.
Mine thrive on ✨vibes✨.
I turn up at wildly inconsistent times like a feral yard goblin and they’re like,
“Ah yes. This version of you again.” ⏰🧌 We LOVE it.
• Executive dysfunction?
You can ignore emails for weeks.
You will not ignore a horse staring at you like you personally ruined their day because you gave them 3 carrots and they know the 4th is in your pocket. 👁️🌾
• Sensory overload?
Phone = too loud.
People = too loud.
Horse chewing hay = perfect.
Brain finally stops buffering. 📵🌾
• Social energy at zero?
Great. Horses do not do small talk. Ideal.
They will stand with you in silence and call it quality time. 🤝
• Hyperfocus?
You only meant to “quickly check” them for the 4th time today.
It’s now dark, you’re covered in mud, and you’ve started a deep emotional audit of saddle pads and long lost bags of miscellaneous items. 🔦🫠
• Emotional regulation?
Horses sense your internal chaos before you’ve even parked the car.
They don’t judge it.
They just quietly refuse to cooperate until you stop spiralling. Iconic behaviour. 👑
• Masking?
Doesn’t work.
Horse sees straight through it like,
“Please stop pretending you’re fine. I can smell the cortisol.” 👃😐
They don’t care if your life is messy.
They don’t care if you’re late.
They don’t care if you haven’t replied to anyone in your WhatsApp for three days.
They care that you show up.
That you’re kind.
That the hay eventually appears. 🌾💛
It’s not structure.
It’s connection.
And somehow that’s exactly what our brains needed all along.
