29/04/2026
🦋🌞 Dealing with grief🌞🦋
Grief is unfortunately something we all have to experience and go through in our lives, so it's important we equip ourselves with the knowledge and skills to do it in the most healthy way possible. It is also vital we equip our children in the same way.
Having recently lost our very beloved cat (our last pet of the house) I was in a unique position to be able to both help myself and my children through the process with the knowledge I have. That's not to say the hurt was any less, it just helped to recognise the stages and know each one wasn't permanent.
Here's a brief overview:
1️⃣ Denial: It's normal to feel numb or disbelieving when faced with loss. Allow yourself to process your emotions, and seek support from loved ones. It is also important to note that losing a pet is just as upsetting as a friend or family member, so never to be trivialised.
2️⃣ Anger: It's okay to feel angry or frustrated. Find healthy outlets like exercise, creative activities, or talking to a friend. It helped in our case that Charlie was very old and frail, so we knew it was coming, there wasn't so much to be angry about.
3️⃣ Bargaining: You might find yourself thinking "what if?" or "if only...". Practice self-compassion and remind yourself that you're doing the best you can. This for me was the most painful stage as we had decided it was time to send Charlie across the rainbow bridge ourselves. Therefore I was wracked with a lot of thinking about whether we had made the right decision. It helped that I was able to talk to friends and they reassured me that it was the right thing to do.
4️⃣ Depression: It's common to feel overwhelmed, sad, or hopeless. It can feel so overwhelming that you can't breath with the pain. This is when it's important to acknowledge that feeling and let it out through tears. Equally allow yourself the time to do things that bring you joy, to counteract that hopeless feeling. Look for those glimmers and the things you're looking forward to, even though it's really difficult.
5️⃣ Acceptance: This stage isn't about being okay with the loss, but about learning to live with it. Focus on rebuilding your life, and finding ways to honor your loved one. Talk about the memories and good times.
Remember, grief is a unique experience, and there's no timeline. You can go back and forth through the stages. Be patient with yourself, and don't hesitate to seek help when you need it.
For more information about 1:1 coaching drop me an email to sam.safespaces@gmail.com or visit http://safe-spaces.square.site
