04/07/2023
As I navigate supporting families transitioning into parenthood, the weight of responsibility has been palpable at times. A constant awareness of biases, my own included, is necessary. Balancing instinct, research, experience, and the families' own wishes, concerns, lifestyles, beliefs, the research they have done themselves AND deciding where to add yet more information can be tricky.
When I listen to their experiences with obstetricians and midwives, I internally balance what is helpful to challenge or support them to challenge, what can simply be, and what needs further research (and where to turn for it).
You might think 'the research' should be balanced, fair, and well-reasoned (it often isn't) and not in need of filtering and critiquing (but it really is). The western urge to quantify, to value statistics, to trust 'professional opinion' is a whole other battle we all face through life, particularly as parents. Trusting ourselves instead can feel dangerous, we want evidence.
The thing I worry western society as a whole is increasingly incapable of doing to our detriment is simply being, accepting. Trying to fix, to quantify, to 'improve' things constantly is how we broke so many wonderful things about being human. It's why modern birthing is broken. It's why in birth, balance means many small constructive conflicts, gently guiding the experiences of our beloved clients toward a state of balance.
