Brian Blem Unlimited: Counselling Psychologist in Fourways

Brian Blem Unlimited: Counselling Psychologist in Fourways We are un/limited by our detachment/attachment from/to examined/unexamined beliefs and thinking.

I assist teenagers and adults to deal with the pressures of life, by supporting them to be, in order to do and have. This involves body work, heart work, brain work and spirit work. I help my clients rediscover their powerful nature, in order to address the influence of culture.

Please make sure you don't have these regrets on your last day.
17/08/2025

Please make sure you don't have these regrets on your last day.

It all began with a simple essay. Bronnie Ware, an Australian palliative care nurse, once shared online the most common regrets she heard from people in their final days. What she thought was a heartfelt reflection on her experience soon went viral, reaching millions across the world. The raw honesty of the dying had touched something universal in us all; our yearning to live fully before it’s too late. That short piece became one of the most widely read essays on the internet, and from it grew this deeply moving book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.

The messages in this book are timeless and urgently important, serving as a wake-up call in our fast-paced, achievement-obsessed world. By distilling the regrets of those who've run out of time, Ware urges us to reassess our priorities before it's too late—focusing on authenticity, relationships, and joy over societal pressures or material success. This book combines heartfelt anecdotes with practical advice, making abstract regrets feel personal and actionable; and it fosters self-compassion, helping us break cycles of regret through small, intentional changes. Ultimately, it's a guide to dying without remorse by living with intention, reminding us that clarity often comes too late—unless we heed these lessons now.

Here are the five regrets she shares, each carrying its own timeless truth:

1. “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
Perhaps the most haunting regret of all. Many of Bronnie’s patients realized, often too late, that they had spent their lives trying to meet others’ expectations—family, society, or tradition—while burying their own dreams. Their “someday” never came. This regret calls us to examine our own lives: Are we making choices out of fear or duty, or are we daring to live authentically? It’s a reminder to take risks, follow passions, and say yes to the things that matter most before time runs out.

2. “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”
Work gave many patients a sense of security and identity, but in the end, what they longed for wasn’t another paycheck or promotion—it was more time. Time with children who grew up too fast. Time with partners who had longed for their presence. Time for simple joys that were pushed aside. This regret is a quiet alarm bell for all of us caught in the endless chase of busyness. Success loses its shine if it costs us the very relationships and experiences that give life meaning.

3. “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”
So many had lived lives of silence—suppressing their true emotions to keep peace, avoid conflict, or fit in. But unspoken words build walls, leaving relationships shallow or broken. In their final days, Bronnie’s patients wished they had spoken up more: told people they loved them, said no when they meant no, voiced their dreams instead of hiding them. This regret urges us to live with honesty and vulnerability—because withholding our truth only robs us of connection.

4. “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.”
Friendship is one of life’s greatest treasures, yet it is often neglected when life gets busy. Bronnie’s patients shared how easy it had been to let friendships fade over the years, only to realize in the end how irreplaceable those bonds were. In the quiet moments of dying, many longed for familiar laughter, old stories, and the comfort of people who truly knew them. This regret is a gentle push to pick up the phone, write that message, and nurture the relationships that nourish our souls.

5. “I wish I had let myself be happier.”
Perhaps the most surprising regret: happiness, they realized, had always been within their grasp. Yet so many chose worry, fear, and routine instead of joy. They had waited for “better times” or assumed happiness was something external, when in truth it was a choice they could have made all along. In their final reflections, Bronnie’s patients saw how much unnecessary suffering they carried—and how simple it could have been to choose laughter, gratitude, and lightness.

The Top Five Regrets of the Dying is a freeing book. It shows us the paths others wished they had taken, giving us the chance to choose differently today. Bronnie Ware offers us not just stories of endings, but guideposts for living a life we’ll be proud of when our own time comes.

The question is: will we listen to the wisdom of the dying—and start living differently now?

BOOK: https://amzn.to/4mlF9Fq
Enjoy the audiobook with a membership trial using the same link.

One of my heroes.
07/08/2025

One of my heroes.

🕊️💔 "They took my name, my freedom, my family… but they never took my meaning."

I survived four concentration camps.
They stripped me of everything — my books, my dreams, my identity.
Even my pregnant wife… lost.

Every day, I saw someone die.
Some ran into electric fences. Others simply gave up.
I stood at that edge, too.
But I made a choice:
If I couldn't change my fate, I would change my attitude toward it. ⛓️🧠

One freezing night, I imagined myself giving a lecture at a university — telling students about all I had endured.
That vision became my lifeline.
The idea that there could be purpose, even in pain, kept me alive.
It wasn’t just about surviving — it was about finding a reason to live. 📖🔥

When I was finally liberated, I found no one waiting.
My entire family was gone.

I could have given up then. But instead — I chose to write.
And that’s how Man’s Search for Meaning was born.
Not for fame. Not for pity.
But so the world would know:

Even when everything is taken from you,
if you have a “why,” you will always find a “how.” 📝🌅

💭🕯️
"There are things in life you can’t control.
But you can always control how you respond.
And sometimes — that response is what saves you.
Because even in hell,
the one who has a purpose… still has hope."

— Viktor Frankl

The wonderful thing about being human is that we can, and probably should change our minds. You don't have to remain imp...
07/08/2025

The wonderful thing about being human is that we can, and probably should change our minds. You don't have to remain imprisoned in the matrix projected into your life. Learn to nurture your unlimited human nature. That's soul work, and available to all.

🎓 What School Really Does to Children 👁️

They call it education, but what it really teaches is obedience.

💭 Sit still.
💭 Don’t question.
💭 Memorize. Repeat. Forget.
💭 Be quiet unless spoken to.
💭 Get rewarded for compliance — punished for curiosity.

Children are born with wild minds, creative souls, and energy that could light up cities… and then we put them in buildings that grade their worth by how well they repeat information from a system designed decades ago.

🧠 The truth?
School trains kids to function in a system — not to understand it.

Most never learn:
• How to process their emotions
• How to tune into their intuition
• How to think critically or create freely
• How to remember who they are

By the time they leave school, many children have forgotten how to dream.

And that was the point.



🌀 It’s time we stop asking how to “fix the education system” and start asking:

Why does a free being need to be trained to fit inside a cage in the first place?

Very true, very inspirational, very sad.
06/08/2025

Very true, very inspirational, very sad.

Every day we slaughter our finest impulses. That is why we get a heartache when we read those lines written by the hand of a master and recognize them as our own, as the tender shoots which we stifled because we lacked the faith to believe in our own powers, our own criterion of truth and beauty. Every man, when he gets quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. there is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, only to discover what is already there.

Henry Miller

A deeply thought provoking conversation with Chat GPT on "Belonging and Spiritual Evolution". Please take your time to r...
06/07/2025

A deeply thought provoking conversation with Chat GPT on "Belonging and Spiritual Evolution". Please take your time to read it and let me know what you think.

Shared via ChatGPT

I just love this. Humans individually and collectively defying and dis-appointing archaic leaders. Keep it up.
30/06/2025

I just love this. Humans individually and collectively defying and dis-appointing archaic leaders. Keep it up.

A giant crowd throngs the Hungarian capital, championing LGBT rights and defying PM Viktor Orban.

Trust....the currency of human relationships. No trust, no relationship. Complete trust, complete relationship.
28/06/2025

Trust....the currency of human relationships. No trust, no relationship. Complete trust, complete relationship.

Remember that CEO who took a pay cut so he could pay all his employees a minimum wage of $70,000? Here’s what happened next:

“Six years later after the decision that others said would destroy his business, Dan reports that revenue has tripled, the customer base has doubled, 70% of his employees have paid down debt, many bought homes for the first time, 401(k) contributions grew by 155% and turnover dropped in half. His business is now a Harvard Business School case study.”

In his own words:

“6 years ago today I raised my company's min wage to $70k. Fox News called me a socialist whose employees would be on bread lines.

Since then our revenue tripled, we're a Harvard Business School case study & our employees had a 10x boom in homes bought.

Always invest in people.”

Brilliant! Every home should have this book.
28/06/2025

Brilliant! Every home should have this book.

Travel - definitely the university of life.
20/06/2025

Travel - definitely the university of life.

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”

- The Innocents Abroad

Getting back to nature is the way to heal ourselves and our planet.
07/06/2025

Getting back to nature is the way to heal ourselves and our planet.

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