21/12/2023
Mindfulness and self reflection can be really helpful when making the transition from ‘work time’ to ‘holiday time’. This applies to the short cycles of work and holiday during the year, but also the huge shift from work to retirement.
Some people can effortlessly slip in to holiday mode and for those lucky ones the following may not be relevant.
There can be an expectation of instant peace, relaxation and enjoyment in holiday times. This, for me at least, is rarely the case!
My mind knows that I’m on holiday, but my body, emotions and mental patterns didn’t get the memo! The cogs are still turning, the plates are still spinning, the fuel lines are still primed and ready for action. As a result, there are feelings of restlessness, a jittery energy looking for somewhere to go - looking for something to do. There’s an unexpected and unwelcome anxiety for no apparent reason.
It’s understandable really. During work time, if we were to stop and do nothing there would be consequences. We could lose our job. If we lost our job, we wouldn’t be able to support ourselves. In some ways, stopping doing is a threat to our very survival! It takes a while for our emotions and body to catch up to what’s happening and let go.
This is all natural and normal and in some ways beyond our control. What is within our control is our reaction to it.
First we need to make it conscious. If left under the radar, all kinds of judgements and reactions might happen born from frustration, disappointment, shame etc which of course would create more of this moving forward.
‘Right now there are feelings of restlessness and there is a difficulty in settling and that is normal. There’s nothing wrong with me and this will settle in its own time. I’ve finished x, y and z now. That’s all done. Stopping is okay and allowed.’
We can then decide what will be helpful in this time.
For me, getting on with another project, some DIY, fixing something or creating something is a helpful way of using that adrenaline and doing energy. Whilst doing that I can keep reflecting on how the feelings are fading and eventually I find myself in rest and relaxation mode.
For others, it could be forcing themselves to do something good and relaxing for themselves which they wouldn’t normally do now. A movie in the morning. A really long walk. A coffee in town.
As with all experiences, we learn to look and feel - make it conscious while practising non judgement and self compassion. We realise that without this, the difficulties recreate themselves - sow seeds and spawn into our future through our unconscious reactivity.
By coming back to the moment and ‘allowing that which is beyond our control’ to be there we break the cycle.
Happy holidays everyone! I’m off to put together a new chicken coop! 🐔 ❤️
