29/07/2025
Have you ever heard of the default psychology theory? It's wildly accurate!
Basically, if a person's default setting is to be mean, unfriendly, unkind, stand offish, selfish, snakey or even abusive.....then whenever they behave in a way that's contrary to this, its noticed and celebrated.
For example, you could be an absolute bully, but even one tiny act of compassion stands out. It tricks people into believing that maybe you really are a good person. You all of a sudden go from being the bully to the victim. You get sympathy, compassion and ur one act of compassion is celebrated. So much so that all the other nasty stuff u have done is quickly forgotten about. Que fake tears and a sob story.
On the other hand, if your default setting is to be kind, loving, friendly, good, compassionate and helpful etc etc.....the moment you show any evidence of anger, boundaries, frustration, making a mistake or even just having a bad day, it is noticed and condemned. People will say things like "I knew they were fake", "I knew they were bad", "they have shown their true colours".
So pay attention to people's default settings, because that is who they truly are.
If 99% of the time they are NOT good, then that is who they are (in their current state).
If 99% of the time they are good, then that is who they are (in their current state).
Don't be tricked!