11/12/2025
DEPRESSION as ANGER turned INWARD? - there are many causes of depression, and of anger. And many types of anger. But sometimes, one aspect of depression can be anger turned inward - even, especially, when we don't realise we're doing this. I've seen this often in my counselling room. Someone tells me their story, something heartbreakingly sad and painful, perhaps something that happened in childhood, perhaps not. Perhaps they're minimising what happened, dismissing it; perhaps they've internalised shame, some deep belief that it was at root their fault; perhaps they've suppressed all emotions round it and don't appear to feel anything about it at all; perhaps something else... And I'm listening, and thinking "where's the anger"? And gradually, as we process their experience together, I see a shift. Perhaps it's a realisation that "I was a child. It wasn't my fault"; perhaps it's feeling safe enough within the counselling space to begin to access feelings long buried. And there comes a glimmer of anger. We can talk about safe (non-violent, non-aggressive) ways to let that anger out - sometimes just giving it a bit of recognition in the therapy room is enough. But, often, when that anger energy can be turned outward (in an appropriate way), rather than swallowed down - that's when a bit more energy becomes available, and when the depression can start to shift.
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