31/12/2025
I noticed they put on a lot of Spider-Man movies over Christmas. I didn’t watch any of them, but one of the most-often quoted lines comes up in therapy from time to time: “With great power comes great responsibility.” But usually it’s the other way round.
We humans often tend to try and avoid responsibility, perhaps because we find it easier to let someone else do the work of making a decision (and thereby avoid the consequences of getting it wrong), or maybe because we have not been taught or encouraged to trust our ability to make good choices.
The trouble with this way of doing life is that as you give away responsibility to someone else, you also give away your power. And the more you do it, the less powerful and the less capable you feel. You might become low in mood, anxious or even depressed as you move ever further away from your authentic self.
If you’re feeling trapped, fed up, stifled or bored as you head into a new year, don’t look around at your circumstances or another person for the culprit or cause. Turn your attention inward, check your values and needs and see how you’re meeting them. Because it’s your responsibility to do that for yourself. And with responsibility comes power.
Don’t just ask yourself ‘what do I want’, ask ‘what do I need’. Seek out those things and people that will provide you not only with comfort or pleasure, but also look for opportunities to grow and learn. Moving out of your comfort zone is supposed to be uncomfortable, and once you realise you can bear discomfort, anything is possible. You will empower yourself, become a better, more authentic person. But with power comes responsibility…
I know, it feels risky. Change itself is hard; the idea of letting discomfort be alongside you, rather than trying to push it away or distract yourself from it feels unnatural. But as cosy as comfort feels, it’s not good for you to stagnate, and comfort feels so much better when it alternates with challenge.
Therapy is a good place to explore these ideas, to identify and melt away the resistance that’s keeping you stuck or dragging you down. You’re an amazing, unique individual, you want the best from life. Don’t just keep ‘managing’ through another year. You’re not alone. ❤️
