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Serenity of Mind Therapy

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Haywards Heath
Serenity of Mind Therapy

Psychodynamic Counselling and Psychotherapy Practice with clinics in Haywards Heath, West Sussex and Crowborough, East Sussex. Hello, I’m Kevin.

Following a 20-year+ career working in Product Management and Human Resources in mostly large private and public sector organisations in Sussex and Surrey, I retrained to become a therapist and founded Serenity of Mind Therapy. I am a qualified psychodynamic counsellor/therapist with a BACP accredited diploma in psychodynamic counselling and a BSc (Hons) in Psychology, offering online and face-to-face sessions for those experiencing all kinds of issues from relationship difficulties, grief, depression and anxiety, all the way to complex PTSD from trauma and childhood sexual, psychological and physical abuse. I am passionate about helping and guiding clients toward greater fulfilment and progress on their journey toward resolution, healing and growth, aligning with my practice name – Serenity of Mind. I deeply value the transformative potential of counselling and therapy, which is rooted in my own firsthand experiences. During my three-year training, I embarked on a personal therapeutic journey, which underscored the importance of finding someone who provided a safe, supportive and confidential space. My aim is to build an accepting and trusting relationship where you can openly and honestly talk and explore your feelings, thoughts, behaviours and concerns without judgement. I feel creating such an environment is crucial when navigating our inner landscapes and especially when exploring complex issues like historical trauma or various forms of abuse. I recognise the significance of delving into the underlying causes of your struggles and offer compassionate support as we explore and unravel the complexities together that may be contributing to your distress and impacting your life currently. Through a blend of insight, analysis, and compassionate support, I provide a space where you can feel both understood and challenged. My counselling room in Haywards Heath, West Sussex, is based within historic Oathall House, set within peaceful grounds with private parking and bathroom facilities. This location is approximately 10 minutes from junction 10a on the M23, a 20-minute drive from Crawley and a 30-minute drive from Brighton. It is also well located for residents of Burgess Hill, Horsham, East Grinstead, Hassocks, Hurstpierpoint, Ditchling and other Mid-Sussex towns and villages. My counselling room in Crowborough, East Sussex, is based within the modern Basepoint business centre, with waiting area, bathroom facilities and free parking available in the Waitrose car park next door (up to three hours). This location is approximately a 10-minute drive from Tunbridge Wells on the A26, a 15-minute drive from Uckfield and a 20-minute drive from East Grinstead. It is also well located for residents of Rotherfield, Mayfield, Wadhurst, Nutley, Maresfield, Buxted, Newick, Forest Row, Heathfield and other High Weald area towns and villages.

25/11/2025

❄️ Seasonal Affective Disorder — When the Weather Forecast Slips Into Our Inner World ❄️

Some experiences don’t march into our lives, they drift in, a bit like November cloud cover, quietly shifting the atmosphere before we’ve even reached for the light switch. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is one of those visitors: subtle, persistent, and often misunderstood.

SAD highlights the tug-of-war between our inner world and the darker, shorter days around us. Low light, early nights, and skies the colour of porridge can stir something deep: retreat, resistance, longing, and the occasional fantasy of hibernating until spring. I explore this emotional seasonality in my new blog:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/11/24/seasonal-affective-disorder-sad/

If something in the piece resonates or nudges at a familiar feeling about the winter months, don’t hesitate to reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Explore the Winter Blues and Seasonal Affective Disorder with warmth, insight and humour. Understand SAD and find support to navigate the darker months

18/11/2025

✨ Wicked: For Good — Difference, Bravery, and Becoming Ourselves ✨

Every now and then a story strolls into our cultural consciousness, taps us on the shoulder, and says something quietly profound about who we are. Wicked: For Good does exactly that, all while serving emerald cities, flying broomsticks, and more emotional rivalry than a family at Christmas playing Monopoly.

The film offers up the whole psychological buffet, difference, belonging, envy, repair, identity, shadow work, longing, and the kind of friendship that only develops after you’ve silently judged someone and then realised, annoyingly, that you actually quite like them.

Wicked reminds us that becoming ourselves often involves a little chaos, a little courage, and occasionally defying gravity (emotionally, at least, no broom required).

I explore all of this in my new blog:
👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/11/17/wicked-difference-and-bravery/

As ever, if something in the story has stirred questions about your own, you don’t have to navigate your becoming alone. And if your shadow self is green? Honestly, join the club.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

A psychodynamic exploration of Wicked: For Good, difference, bravery, belonging and becoming yourself. Therapy insight from Serenity of Mind Therapy.

12/11/2025

🧠 Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month 2025: Why “I’m Fine” Isn’t the Full Story

November rolls around, the nights get darker, the John Lewis Christmas ad drops (cue misty eyes and a lump in the throat) … and it also happens to be Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month.

It’s a funny time of year, we’re encouraged to talk about feelings just as the rest of life speeds up into festive chaos. But for many men, those two little words, “I’m fine”, still do a lot of heavy lifting. They cover the loneliness, the exhaustion, the quiet sense that something’s not quite right, but admitting that feels… well, risky.

This month is a reminder to notice how we still measure masculinity by how little we need, how much we endure, and how quickly we get back up. Sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is simply stop and say, “Actually… I’m not fine.”
I explore all of this, in my latest blog:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/11/11/mens-mental-health-awareness-month-2025/

Because sometimes, strength begins with slowing down enough to be seen. So, if any of this resonates with you, don’t hesitate to reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

November is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, a warm, witty reflection from a psychodynamic counsellor in Haywards Heath and Crowborough.

05/11/2025

🎯 Perfectionism: When “Doing Your Best” Becomes Doing Too Much

There’s a certain irony in writing a blog about perfectionism, because of course, I wanted it to be perfect.

Perfectionism often dresses itself up as ambition or high standards, the kind of thing we casually mention in job interviews as if it’s a strength (“I’m just a bit of a perfectionist”). But in therapy, it usually turns out to be something else: a weary kind of striving, an ache for approval, or a quiet fear of getting it wrong. But perfectionism isn’t really about being perfect. It’s about being safe. It’s the mind’s way of saying, “If I can just get everything right, maybe I won’t be rejected, criticised, or found lacking.”

But that safety comes at a cost, burnout, anxiety, and the nagging sense that no matter what you do, it’s never quite enough. I explore all of this in my latest blog:

https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/11/02/perfectionism-when-striving-becomes-self-sabotage/

So, if you want to explore why your perfectionism might originate from a place of fear, how it disguises itself as diligence, and what happens when you begin to loosen its grip, not to give up caring, but to rediscover being human, please reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Perfectionism can feel like striving for success, but often hides self-critique and exhaustion. Explore how therapy helps find freedom from needing perfection.

29/10/2025

🌿 Hidden Grief: The Loss Nobody Sent a Card For

When we think of grief, we often picture the obvious kind, funerals, condolences, casseroles at the door. But there’s another sort of grief that slips quietly into our lives, no flowers, no “sorry for your loss” cards, just an ache that keeps rearranging the furniture inside us.

A job that ended without fanfare. A friendship that faded. The version of yourself you miss since becoming a parent. A dream career that quietly packed its bags. These aren’t the headline losses, but they hurt all the same. Hidden grief is tricky precisely because it hides. There’s no ritual, so we minimise it, “It’s not that bad,” “I should be grateful,” “Others have it worse.” Meanwhile, our bodies and hearts keep whispering: something’s missing.

I explore these quiet losses, how to recognise them, how to tend to them, and how to bring them gently into the light, in my latest blog:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/10/28/hidden-grief-how-loss-shows-up/

If you’ve caught yourself thinking, “It’s not a big loss… but it still hurts,” that might be your sign to pause for a moment. Hidden grief just wants a bit of space to be seen and heard. If that resonates, you’re welcome to reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Hidden grief isn’t always obvious. Learn how unseen losses affect you and how therapy in Haywards Heath or Crowborough can help.

22/10/2025

🤍 From Surviving to Thriving: Therapy as a Path Beyond Coping Mechanisms

Somewhere between “I’m fine” and “I’m holding it all together,” there’s often a quiet whisper underneath — “I’m exhausted.”

Most of us become experts at survival. We keep calm, carry on, crack jokes, overthink, or stay busy. These coping mechanisms once protected us, and often still do. But at some point, they can start to run the show, keeping us safe, yes, but also keeping us stuck.

From a psychodynamic perspective, coping mechanisms are like emotional time capsules, relics from moments when we needed to survive something we couldn’t yet understand. Therapy gives us space to open them up, with curiosity rather than judgement, and to discover what might be possible when we’re no longer just coping, but living. I explore these ideas in my latest blog:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/10/16/from-surviving-to-thriving/

If you find yourself running on emotional autopilot, forever coping, never quite exhaling, perhaps this is your reminder that it’s okay to want more than survival, so feel free to contact me.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Explore how psychodynamic therapy helps you move beyond coping mechanisms and rediscover a life that feels alive, connected, and truly thriving.

15/10/2025

🤔 Unravelling Childhood Echoes: How Early Experiences Shape Adult Relationships

Our earliest relationships don’t just fill photo albums, they shape the way we connect, argue, trust, retreat, and love as adults. Those quiet echoes from childhood often whisper beneath the surface of our adult relationships, until something (or someone) strikes the same chord again.

Many of our present patterns, the need to please, the fear of closeness, or that sudden instinct to pull away, can be traced back to early emotional experiences. These weren’t “mistakes” so much as survival strategies that once made perfect sense. The trouble is, they often outstay their usefulness.

I explore in my latest blog, how understanding these echoes isn’t about blame or nostalgia, it’s about awareness, compassion, and choice. When we see where our emotional reflexes were first written, we finally get the chance to rewrite them. Read more👇:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/10/10/unravelling-childhood-echoes/

If you’ve ever wondered why certain dynamics keep repeating, or why some relationships feel like déjà vu with better lighting, perhaps this piece will resonate, so feel free to contact me.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Explore how childhood experiences shape adult relationships through self-reflection and psychodynamic insight in therapy.

09/10/2025

🤯 World Mental Health Day 2025: The Cracks That Let the Light In

Friday 10th October 2025 is World Mental Health Day, this year’s theme, “Access to mental health support in times of crisis,” feels particularly relevant here in the UK. Between the cost of living strain, political fatigue, and the “keep calm and carry on” mentality, it can feel as though we’ve all been living through one long, slow-motion emergency.

From a psychodynamic lens, when the world feels unsafe, we often regress, back into old patterns of denial, stoicism, or apologising for needing anything at all. But needing support isn’t weakness; it’s profoundly human. I explore these themes in my latest blog, read more here:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/10/09/world-mental-health-day-2025/

If you’ve found yourself quietly unravelling while trying to hold it all together, perhaps this is your reminder that you don’t have to manage the emergency alone and can reach out for support.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Reflecting on World Mental Health Day 2025, exploring crisis, resilience, and the quiet hope that begins with reaching out for support.

07/10/2025

🤦 Why do we sabotage ourselves?

Maybe it’s staying up until 2am the night before a big presentation, “forgetting” to send that job application, or choosing yet another partner who can’t commit. On the surface, we want success, love, and fulfilment, yet our unconscious often has other plans.

Self-sabotage isn’t stupidity or laziness. It’s usually protection: avoiding rejection, staying loyal to old patterns, or keeping ourselves safe in the familiar. The trouble is, it keeps us stuck, I explore the psychodynamic roots in my latest blog, read more here:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/10/03/why-we-sabotage-ourselves/

If you feel you repeat painful patterns, perhaps therapy (with a dash of humour and compassion) can help you step out of the loop, so contact me.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic therapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Why do we sabotage ourselves? Discover the unconscious drives behind self-defeat and how psychodynamic counselling can help break the cycle.

01/10/2025

🌿 Are you exhausted from always saying “yes”?

People-pleasing can feel like living a life scripted by everyone else, polite, helpful, agreeable… but leaving your own needs in the wings. Over time, it can erode your sense of self, create burnout, and leave you feeling unseen.

In my latest blog, I explore how therapy can support you in breaking free from people-pleasing and building deeper, more honest relationships, read more here:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/09/28/breaking-free-from-people-pleasing/

Psychodynamic therapy offers a way to pause the performance, uncover the roots of these patterns, explore why saying “no” feels so difficult, and create space to reclaim your voice. You don’t have to swing to the opposite extreme, just learn to live authentically, with your needs and desires recognised.

If you’re ready to step off the stage and be fully yourself, reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic psychotherapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Discover how psychodynamic therapy helps break free from people-pleasing, reclaim your voice, and live authentically with confidence and self-respect.

16/09/2025

😰 Anxiety and Stress: Beyond the Surface

We live in a culture that loves quick fixes. Feeling stressed? Try some deep breathing. Anxious? Watch a mindfulness video with a calm voice guiding you to a beach. (Lovely… unless you hate sand or sun cream.)

These surface strategies can help in the moment, but if the anxiety keeps coming back, it might be a sign that something deeper is going on. Much like taping over a flashing warning light in your car, you get temporary relief without addressing the engine underneath.

In my latest blog, I explore why quick fixes often don’t go far enough, the deeper roots of anxiety and stress, and how psychodynamic counselling can help create lasting change by looking beneath the surface. Read more here:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/09/14/anxiety-and-stress-beyond-the-surface/

If uncovering the origins of your own anxiety resonates, whether in early experiences, internal narratives, or recurring relationship patterns, reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic psychotherapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Discover why quick fixes for stress and anxiety don’t last. Learn how psychodynamic counselling explores root causes to create lasting change

10/09/2025

🤯 The Inner Critic: Where It Comes From and How to Quiet It

We all know that voice, the one that pipes up just when you’re feeling good about yourself.

“You’ll mess it up next time.”
“Why even try?”
“You’re not enough.”

That’s the inner critic at work: sharp, undermining, and often relentless.

In my latest blog, I explore where this voice comes from, family echoes, childhood experiences, and the culture around us, and how we can begin to quiet it. From naming your critic (“Sergeant Perfect,” anyone?) to developing a kinder, more compassionate voice, there are ways to turn down its volume. Read the full blog here:

👉 https://serenityofmindtherapy.com/2025/09/07/the-inner-critic/

Psychodynamic therapy can help uncover the roots of the critic and create space for a gentler, truer sense of self to emerge. If this resonates, reach out.

I’m a UK-based psychodynamic psychotherapist and a registered member (MBACP) of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), offering both online and in-person sessions in Crowborough, East Sussex, and Haywards Heath, West Sussex.

Discover where the inner critic comes from and how to quiet it. Explore psychodynamic insights and ways to nurture self-compassion.

Address

Oathall House
Haywards Heath
RH163EN

Opening Hours

Monday	8am - 8pm
Tuesday	8am - 8pm
Wednesday	6pm - 8pm
Friday	8am - 8pm

Website

http://www.serenityofmindtherapy.com/

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