AJH Therapy

29/08/2025

27/08/2025

I went to the beach last night, stayed until sunset, wave watching as an Atlantic swell roared in at high tide. It was exhilarating and awesome at the same time.
The sea and the waves help me to rebalance. It helps because they are a constant.
I find it reassuring to know that whatever is happening in your life and in the wider world, the tide will come in, and the tide will go out. Sometimes calm and gentle waves lapping on the beach, sometime a roaring monster with relentless noise and energy, like last night. But the tide still came in, and it still went back out again. It may be affected by external influences, but it still did its thing, and in a world where anxiety and fear are prevalent, for me that is a helpful reminder of the constants. External factors may influence my mood or my reactions, but at my core I am the same and my values are my own constant.

25/08/2025

Let me remind you (and also myself): It’s okay to change your mind. Some things you thought you wanted at one time and maybe things change. That's okay.

25/08/2025

Happy Monday everyone.

25/08/2025

We all know how to breathe. It’s a completely unconscious, necessary function. But there are different breathing patterns and how we breathe varies, depending on the situation we are in.

Being able to relax is an important and valuable skill to have. It doesn’t come naturally to everybody, and like most things in life we need to practice it to get better at it. The right breathing pattern is a major skill in relaxing the mind and the body simultaneously. The benefits of being properly relaxed can include:

 Not getting headaches
 Feeling less tired
 Being less anxious and irritable
 Better sleep patterns
 Being less confrontational
 Coping better with anxiety
 Feeling motivated

The ability to relax is also an important factor for success. Mental focus, the right breathing and a positive attitude all make a difference. Practising helpful breathing before participating in sport, for example, can positively influence the outcome, as it focusses thoughts on achieving, and helps calm and therefore focus the mind.

Fear / Exercise / Sleep / Anger / Upset / Anxiety all create different types of breathing. People experiencing anxiety or panic attacks will have much faster, shallower breaths than someone who is asleep or resting. It is possible to get our breathing under control to decrease tension, to relax our bodies by decreasing heart and pulse rates, or even to increase alertness by providing more oxygen to the brain. It is impossible to be mentally anxious in a physically relaxed body.

Breathing exercise – practice for 2 minutes at a time, any time
1. Feet flat on floor, hands resting in lap, (eyes closed – optional)
2. Breathe in, deep slow breath for count of 3
3. Then breathe out, slowly through mouth for count of 5
4. As you breathe out, feel yourself release all the tension out
with the old air
5. Repeat
6. When It feels comfortable, increase count to 5 in and 7 out

Visualising exercise – practice several times a day for effectiveness
1. Close eyes, breathing steadily
2. Visualise anxiety level as a number
3. Mentally turn the number down
4. See it reach 5 or less
5. Then think about how relaxed the breathing feels
6. Then imagine you can hear my voice
7. Listen to my voice, soothing you, calming you reassuring you
8. Tell yourself how much more in control you are
9. Then ask yourself what number now?
10. See the number turn down again

Visualising – calming yourself
1. Close eyes, breathe steadily until feel relaxed & calm
2. See yourself doing the task
3. SEE yourself & everything you do staying calm
4. FEEL yourself staying calm
5. HEAR yourself being calm
6. AS you sit calmly, link that feeling to a positive memory
7. Immediately allow yourself to relax in the same way

When medical advice is to practice breathing, it is so often dismissed or ignored, and yet is is one of the most powerful and effective ways to improve our symptoms and our general well being. And its free!

On a beautiful day like today, try sitting in the sunshine and practising. It's worth it!

20/08/2025

try this tip for stressful feelings: turn your face up to the sky, close your eyes, then take a full deep breath in. Make an "O" shape with your mouth and breathe out really slowly, until you can imagine you are completely deflated. Repeat; but this time imagine as you breathe in you are sucking up all the negative emotions inside you, and as you breathe out, you are blowing them up into the sky. They are gone. Do this a few times. Then keep your eyes closed and just "be" in the moment- aware of the breeze on your skin and the sun on your face. Then do a final breath, like a big sigh to release any tension in your shoulders. And on with your day!

*photo just because nature is brilliant, and I felt some really positive emotions the day I took it

17/08/2025

places like this are one way I keep myself grounded. Self care is so important and a calming 30 minutes by the sea always helps to refocus or reframe. It also helps my obsession with photographing clouds and skies lol

17/08/2025

SLEEP.
Sleep is vitally important for everyone. It affects physical, emotional and mental wellbeing. It is quite normal for us to experience times in our lives when we have poor sleep. Our bodies have a natural rhythm and if that pattern gets disrupted, our sleep is affected. It’s also quite common for people to look for a practical reason why, it’s the bed, the mattress, the room temp, and sometimes those things are true. Very often they are avoiding the real reason because it’s too difficult to acknowledge. Before you look for an external cause, ask yourself these questions:

Do I have any worries about failing at something important to me?
Sleep problems often stem from a fear or worry, especially failure (maybe your job or a relationship) as your mind becomes hyper alert to keep you awake and on top of everything you need to deal with.

Do I feel guilty about anything?
Feeling of guilt (past or present) can interrupt sleep, whether they are real or worries.

Am I worrying about things that are out of my control?
Sometimes we spend a lot of energy wanting or wishing for things we just can’t have, or for other people to be different, which we can never control.

Am I trying too hard to go to sleep?
Trying too hard is the best possible way to ensure you don’t get to sleep. Telling yourself I MUST get to sleep now just makes the brain more active and alert, as it stays awake to perform the task you are currently doing, which is worrying.

If you answer yes to any of these questions, it may simply be that the worry thoughts you are experiencing are causing your current sleep problems. Rather than focus on your sleep environment, perhaps it would help to tackle the feelings underneath. There is lots of good help and advice, I recommend searching the nhs website, or you could talk to someone about what bothering you underneath.

13/08/2025

If you have anxiety, have you ever tried to explain how it feels to someone who doesn't share it? Anxiety is simultaneously psychological, physical, emotional and behavioural. Anxiety is the OVERWHELMING feeling of fear, worry, dread, apprehension or panic that takes over when you think something bad is going to happen. And in that moment, nothing else matters and very little can calm you back down.
And everyone who's ever felt anxiety will know, there’s nothing worse than being told, however well meant, to calm down, there’s no need to panic. Try telling that to your unconscious! I always want to say, Oh good idea, just calm down, I never thought of that!
Instead, trying asking the person, how can I help you in this moment? What do you need?

17/07/2025

Why finding a counsellor on an Accredited Register is important and why all counsellors need to belong to one. Choosing a therapist is a big step, and it’s important that you feel safe and supported. If you’re thinking about finding a counsellor / psychotherapist, you’re probably already askin...

07/07/2025

shared post

Anxiety isn’t weakness, it’s overprotection. Here’s how to recognise it and start finding relief.