Counselling Time

30/12/2024

https://www.facebook.com/share/r/18GaaJByfW/?mibextid=wwXIfr

08/11/2024

Let go of perfection in motherhood. Discover how embracing vulnerability and seeking support can lead to deeper connections and self-acceptance.

15/09/2024

If this helps you to reach out - then good job dove

Therapist Jo Simmons debunks 5 common myths about counselling and therapy.

10/09/2024

Love this poem from Spike Milligan 😍
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Ten Unknown Facts About
1. Founding and History: BMW, Bayerische Motoren Werke AG, was founded in 1916 in Munich, Germany, initially producing aircraft engines. The company transitioned to motorcycle production in the 1920s and eventually to automobiles in the 1930s.
2. Iconic Logo: The BMW logo, often referred to as the "roundel," consists of a black ring intersecting with four quadrants of blue and white. It represents the company's origins in aviation, with the blue and white symbolizing a spinning propeller against a clear blue sky.
3. Innovation in Technology: BMW is renowned for its innovations in automotive technology. It introduced the world's first electric car, the BMW i3, in 2013, and has been a leader in developing advanced driving assistance systems (ADAS) and hybrid powertrains.
4. Performance and Motorsport Heritage: BMW has a strong heritage in motorsport, particularly in touring car and Formula 1 racing. The brand's M division produces high-performance variants of their regular models, known for their precision engineering and exhilarating driving dynamics.
5. Global Presence: BMW is a global automotive Company
6. Luxury and Design: BMW is synonymous with luxury and distinctive design, crafting vehicles that blend elegance with cutting-edge technology and comfort.
7. Sustainable Practices: BMW has committed to sustainability, incorporating eco-friendly materials and manufacturing processes into its vehicles, as well as advancing electric vehicle technology with models like the BMW i4 and iX.
8. Global Manufacturing: BMW operates numerous production facilities worldwide, including in Germany, the United States, China, and other countries, ensuring a global reach and localized production.
9. Brand Portfolio: In addition to its renowned BMW brand, the company also owns MINI and Rolls-Royce, catering to a diverse range of automotive tastes and luxury segments.
10. Cultural Impact: BMW's vehicles often become cult

28/08/2024

26/08/2024

26/08/2024

22/08/2024

Drop a heart if you agree 💚

If your child or a young person you know is receiving their GCSE Results today remind them to take their time and let them know they aren't alone.

Grades are just one small part of what makes young people who they are.

Childline counsellors are available to all under 19s via phone, email, 1-2-1 chat and Sign Video. Search 'Childline' to find out more 🔎

Image description: "Every young person receiving their GCSE Results today deserves to be proud, listened to and supported," written in green on a blue sticky note. The note is overlayed over an image of a young person concentrating and writing in a school exercise book.

20/08/2024

Familiar?

I'm independent, feeling free. I met someone who’s incredible. He’s older, he’s smart, and he treats me like a lady. He tells me that I’m beautiful, wise; he loves my outlook on life. I know I don’t have to think it but, hypothetically, if he hit me, I would leave him.
He treats me so much better than I’ve ever been treated before. He really notices me, he compliments me, he’s texting me constantly. He’s mature, he’s smarter, and he would never hurt me. He never would, but of course, if he hit me, I would leave him.

We connect on a level that’s hard to describe. He really gets me, he wants the same things in life. For the first time I feel completely understood. I’m feeling full of hope and excitement, he says he is too! He feels the same way as I do! It couldn’t possibly happen, not in a million years, but if a man hit me, I would leave him.

He says he loves me! That’s a bit quick. Wants to move in together? We’ve only been dating one month. But now, I’ve offended him, what am I doing? I may never find another soul mate like him. Ok, I’ll do it, I love you too. He won’t hit me, but if he did, I would leave him.

Living together, he seems a bit distant, I wonder what’s wrong. I try to make him feel better, but nothing’s working. I try all the things he usually likes; make the house spotless, cook a nice meal, try and talk to him and show him I care. But he won’t open up; maybe I’ve done something, but what? We were so good before, I’ll try and make this work, but of course, if he hit me, I’d leave him.

Things have changed, when did that happen? He gets so angry, his eyes seem possessed. Shouting and raging like I’ve never seen before. And then he’s so cold, not just distant, but silent. Sometimes for days he will ignore my existence. I beg him to forgive me, but I’m not sure what for. Suddenly things are ok again, I see the old him. If I just stop messing up he will stop getting mad. But, if he hits me, I will leave him.

It’s so sweet how I’m so naive, he says. I guess it’s true, he’s smarter than me. I want to meet up with friends but he tells me he’s hurt. Don’t I ever think about how it makes him feel, he says. He has no friends nearby but I want to meet up with mine, he says. I guess it’s true, I’m selfish too. I say sorry and stay at home watching TV in silence with him. Still, if he hits me, I think I will leave him.

We’re moving. He will feel less stressed living near his family again. I ask if it’s ok to meet up with friends before we leave. Are you sure that’s a good idea, he says. He points out how I abandoned my friends when we started dating and my friends are probably mad. He’s right! I’ve been a terrible friend! I won’t text them. I’m so lucky he loves me with all of my flaws. If he hit me, I guess I would leave him.

We’ve moved away now. I feel so alone. He works long hours. I feel less tense when he’s not home but I miss him terribly and I’m waiting on him. I hear the key in the lock. I’m excited but my anxiety rises because I don’t know what mood he will be in. He seems ok, I try to cuddle on the sofa, but he tuts and says he’s tired and I’m needy. I feel hollow and I long for his love. If he hit me, I guess I might leave him.

His friends are over. I like it when his friends are here because he is more affectionate towards me. He tells them he’s proud of me. They say how we are such a great couple, when will we get married? I see that look in his eye and when his friends leave, WHY THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT? I panic, maybe he will leave me this time, and I feel utter despair. If he hit me, I’m not sure I’d leave him.

We plan a daytrip, we don’t have them often. I try to get everything right from the start so that things go smoothly. He’s annoyed because I take too long to get out of the house, but I think it’s ok. But there’s traffic and I begin to get anxious. He starts to drive really close to the cars, surely he knows I hate that, but I dare not say anything. He SHOUTS and SWEARS and my heart sinks, I’m in trouble now. Just try to be invisible, not to make it worse. If he hit me, I don’t know if I’d leave him.

It’s been like this a while now. He says that I’m too sensitive. If I don’t like him how he is, he says I can leave, I know where the door is. He says he wouldn’t try and stop me. But I’ve got nowhere to go, and I’m worth nothing. He is nice to me sometimes, maybe often, it all seems a blur. I can’t make sense of it anymore. Maybe I am too sensitive, it’s probably me. If he hit me, I don’t think I’d leave him.

Something big has happened, the rages seem to get bigger. He started throwing things because I make him so angry. He says he will call the police if I touch his things, or he will hurt me if I don’t listen. He’s been telling lies, I see that now. Lies about money, his life and me. I feel numb. I feel like I’m broken. If he hit me, the pain would at least make sense, but he hasn’t and that’s not the reason I’m leaving.

I left him. I feel stripped down, beaten, exhausted, lost, but I escaped and for that I feel free. But my mind remains imprisoned, I have suffered trauma, and it’s a long journey to recovery. Was it abuse? I tell them it was. Well, what did he do? they ask. I explain, but what am I really explaining, it doesn’t sound like much when my pain is so engulfing. Well, they say, it doesn’t sound great, but at least he didn’t hit you.

- Emma Rose Byham

07/08/2024

Following the appalling race related violence which has affected so many communities, children may be feeling confused, scared or anxious. As parents and carers, it’s important to offer them reassurance, comfort, kindness and patience, and most importantly let them know they’re not alone.

Whilst you may not have the answers to their questions, or be able to explain these traumatic events, you can let them know that Childline is a safe space for any child impacted in anyway by the awful events of the last week.

Young people can speak to a Childline counsellor on the phone, 0800 1111, and online via 1-2-1 chat or email. https://www.childline.org.uk/

06/08/2024

I love these as a reminder.

05/08/2024

😁

22/07/2024

If the content triggers you - seek help & support. Recognise your own denial Be strong and reach out

14/06/2024

Gain essential insights into the complex process of dividing joint assets during a divorce, including legal considerations, court orders, and asset protection strategies.

12/06/2024

Counsellor Joanna Baars explains more about why seeking professional help for your mental health is important

02/06/2024

If this stops you in your tracks - take the first step and talk to someone. 🧡

***Heads up that there are likely to be some potential trigger points in this one re abusive behaviour, so just adding a warning ❤️***

This is Mum; and this is Mum's friend.

Mum's friend is married to a very charming man. Everyone loves him: he is kind, funny, always surrounded by a large circle of friends, and the life and soul of the party.

Mum has often commented to Dad how perfect the marriage of her friend and her husband appears to be.

One day, unexpectedly, Mum's friend arrives on the doorstep. Not for anything in particular, but clearly looking for some company. Mum makes them a pot of tea, and they sit out in the back garden, where they can see the sun throwing dappled shadows through the green leaves on the tree above.

"Are you okay?" Mum asks her friend; and her friend responds with "I'm fine," because that's what we do, isn't it.

And so Mum - who has learnt over the years that "I'm fine," usually means anything but, asks the question again.

"Really, though. Are you okay?"

It turns out, Mum's friend is anything but okay.

It turns out, Mum's friend's kind, charming, loved-by-all husband, is.....not. Over the years, he has transformed from being the man Mum's friend married, to someone who she barely even recognises.

Someone who demands to exert huge amounts of control over how Mum's friend is allowed to live her life.

Someone who takes views on who she should be friends with, and who she shouldn't.

Someone who controls how she spends her money.

Someone who will regularly verbally attack her after they have attended a party or event together, for not paying him the amount of attention he thought he should have been paid.

Someone who tells her off for speaking to other men.

Someone who will demand s*x whenever they want it; who, if Mum's friend doesn't particularly want to have s*x, will have no qualms about ra**ng her, whilst telling her simultaneously that he's doing this because he loves her.

Someone who has convinced Mum's friend that their relationship is perfectly normal, when in fact, it is about as far from normal as a relationship can get. And it has taken a chance comment from a childhood friend, a reference to "coercive control", to get Mum's friend Googling, and to have her end up on Mum's doorstep like this.

Not quite ready to do anything about it just yet.

But ready to talk.

Ready to explore the possible solutions that might be out there.

Ready to hope, that things can, and will, be different for her.

Domestic abuse doesn't have to be physical.

Coercive control is a criminal offence.

Not all victims are women; not all perpetrators are men.

Recent data suggests 95% of coercive control victims are women, and 74% of perpetrators are men, but this is a crime that can happen to, and be committed by, anyone.

Help is out there. Whether you start by speaking with a trusted friend; your GP, the Samaritans, Women's Aid, or anyone else.

Help is out there.

Things can get better.

And while taking that first small step can feel absolutely terrifying, you won't be alone.

Thousands and thousands of other people, just like you, have taken that first step, and have changed their lives for the better in the process.

Nobody should have to live a life of fear ❤️

04/05/2024

Please do take note and responsibility for your own words & actions !! Support young people’s minds This young person does SO much good and should be encouraged 😊

https://www.facebook.com/share/15JEzAbpuZk1L26E/?mibextid=WC7FNe

“This is probably going to tick some people off, and I hope it does. But I’m going to keep on sharing it and saying it. And once again, I am not a Swiftie, but I am a mom bringing up a daughter in a harsh world.

I am extremely disappointed in so many of you who think that "not being a fan" of someone means you're entitled to s**t all over them.

I want to remind you of something.

Your children are watching you complain about Taylor Swift sitting at a football game, being happy, and cheering for a man she loves in what appears to be a very loving, respectful relationship.

Your Children are watching you judge a woman for literally just EXISTING and taking up space happily.

And you know what? Ms. Swift has won 324 awards? How many do you have?

She brought $5 BILLION dollars in consumer spending and boosted the U. S. economy so significantly, that leaders from other countries actually beg for her to play there?

Did you know that there are over 20 college courses about her skills as an artist, lyricist, and musician - including at places like Harvard, Stanford & UC Berkeley?

Did you know that Taylor Swift quietly donates mass amounts of money to local food banks in every city she performs in?

AND DID YOU KNOW …

That Taylor Swift was s*xually assaulted by a radio DJ, and she got him fired? When he sued HER for over $3 million for defamation, she counter sued for a symbolic $1 in a court case that took 2 YEARS for her to win. And, she did that just to show women that fighting for what's right has no price tag & to never be silent in the face of oppression.

WELL IF YOU DON’T CARE BY NOW, YOU SHOULD.

Because your daughters, nieces, and your nephews are watching you run your mouth. And they are seeing the world hate a woman who does so much good, simply because she exists in their line of sight.

DO BETTER PEOPLE.

Teach your boys to respect women. Teach your girls that as women - they are ALLOWED to take up space.

Fix it. Become aware of your words. Because we all have the ability and the obligation to fight for the future of our children with simple moments. And we need to consciously choose to be better for them.”

(Written by JordanLeVeck, shared by Lynn Wright.)