11/08/2022
Why is it that it feels so difficult to simply acknowledge that every now and then, it’s ok for other people to help you. I know a lot of the women who come to see me are, “The Strong One” in their family or friends circle. The one that is always ok on the outside but close to falling apart on the inside.
There is something in here about not wanting to be seen as vulnerable and therefore weak. Therein we have already judged that the idea of someone helping or supporting us means that we are not capable, competent or independent anymore.
If this is you, I’d suggest that what you could do is to start blurring the lines. I know this because I used to equate help with interference. Think about it like this. You’d do what you could to help the people around you, right? It feels good to help others, right?
Well in the same way, when you turn away help and support, you’re kind of denying someone else that opportunity. Would it really kill you to admit that it’s actually a lovely thing that someone is trying to do for you? Think of it as sharing the load if that helps.
If you’re anything like me, I still get really overwhelmed and touched when people offer to help me and I’ve learnt that actually it’s nice to say thank you and let them help me. It takes a lot because you’re beating down that Ego and learning humility in the process, and it is deeply uncomfortable sometimes. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed or you’re dashing the image of perfection. It simply means that you’re prepared to share the load with others that are willing to hold it with you. I like that because it feels much better to me to think of it that way.
We all need a bit of help and support sometimes, especially the strong ones who think they can do it all by themselves. They probably can, but isn’t it much nicer to share?
If you’re the strong one, and you’d like some help from another strong one – please do get in touch and let’s connect.
