07/06/2025
The Day Rosie Taught Me So Much About Change
I came across these pictures that were taken almost twenty years ago at a Richard Bandler NLP event. I remember staring at that white tablecloth, locked in a quiet, but powerful internal battle. On it, calmly moved one of my greatest lifelong fears—a huge, hairy tarantula, named Rosie.
To others, she may have looked like just a spider. But to me, she represented decades of deep-rooted fear, wired into my nervous system, shaped by an early experience that left its imprint.
I stood back, frozen. My body responded with a familiar cocktail of panic: trembling legs, sweaty palms, and a hyper-alert nervous system screaming at me to back away. I couldn't look directly at her—only from the side of my eye, filled with dread and disbelief that I was even in the same room.
Every part of me wanted to run. And yet, I stayed—because deep down, I knew I needed to face this. For what seemed like an eternity, I hovered at the back of the room, my fear wrestling with my desire to change. Then, I began to inch closer. I queued up with many others who felt the same.
After I was reassured that I was safe, with patient guidance, my system started to settle—just a little. Enough to move from fear to curiosity. Maybe, just maybe, this moment could be different?
Slowly, I inched closer. I placed one trembling hand on the table. That, in itself, felt like an impossible victory. My nervous system was buzzing, but something else was taking hold: possibility.
And after what seemed like an eternity sitting there, finally, I did it. I allowed her to come to me. Rosie, soft and surprisingly delicate, walked into my hand with grace. In doing so, she walked me straight into a new chapter of my life.
Rosie, the tarantula who had once embodied what I feared, walked gently across my hand with her delicate legs—graceful, unbothered, and completely unaware of the transformation she was facilitating.
That single moment, changed me. My brain rewired. Fear does not have to be forever. It changed forever how I understood the nervous system, and the incredible power of neuroplasticity.
As I am now running the Neuroplasticity for Behaviour Change course at the Hult International Business School, it is great to look back, because it is the work I love doing with people: helping them move toward their own turning points. Because whether it’s a spider, or an old belief, change is absolutely possible—even when it doesn’t feel like it.
Whenever I think of Rosie, I smile. Because she was a teacher. A gentle, unexpected guide into a life I didn’t know I could have.
Remember, you too, can change.
Sometimes, all it takes is one brave hand on the table.
What is your Rosie?
Thank you Richard Bandler
Neena Saith
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