Fullcircle Psychology

30/05/2022

The parenting load is a big one - as a mum myself who often feels a tad overwhelmed by “all the things,” and talking to friends and my clients in therapy I know this is a common theme.

Often we are grappling with how to fit it all in - and there is so much stuff out there suggesting we just need to do more, be more efficient- somehow magically make it all work - I call it the “magic beans” myth !

I love this book by Laura Vanderkam - it’s a refreshing look at how we use our time - it moves away from that damaging narrative about having to have it all sorted and just using more hours in the day for work. She offers some really interesting ideas 💡

So if you’re trying to find ways of figuring out how on earth you’re going to make it through - give it a read!

26/05/2022

Parents often ask me how they can build and maintain positive and close relationships with their child/teen.

In my work with children and teenagers I’ll often ask if they have shared a particular worry or problem they have with their parent. Very often the response is - “No” - when I ask how come - it’s often something along the lines of … “‘my parents don’t really listen to me, they just tell me what I should do / think, I don’t feel as though my parents accept my feelings.”

I know as parents we really want to be there for our children and support them through the difficulties they might be facing - and sometimes we want to quickly “problem solve” situations they describe to us - “what about this,” “have you tried that,” “maybe it’s not as bad as you think…”

Yes I know it’s coming from a place of love and concern - but we need to hear them out first - give our children that open space to talk about their thoughts and feelings, explore their inner world out loud - because that is the way that they start to make sense of things and figure out what will feel helpful.

In turn by listening we show that we are present and able to accept them - whole heartedly- it’s important enough for us to give it our full attention.

Try this next time your child comes to you to talk about a situation - ask questions to find out how they feel and hold off offering solutions for later.

08/03/2022

I’m all for doing things that build you up and nourish your soul to keep you afloat and feeling able to cope with the demands of parenting.

So - YES - self-care is important because if we’re totally exhausted as parents we struggle to meet the needs of our children and teens.

However, I am always so struck by the way parents are sold various solutions - usually some single thing - that if you do, buy or sign up to - will make all the difference and miraculously resolve the difficulties.

To the parent trying to balance seemingly endless and ever-changing demands of life and raising children - this often feels like a rather unfair sell. For many parents I talk to it can also create a sense of guilt and shame - as though somehow they have missed a trick and everyone else has it sorted.

I just want parents to know - self-care is a holistic approach - and one that is helped when we are able to check in with ourselves and listen in to the struggles we face without judgment and with compassion. The real solutions then become more apparent to us - this may or may not include various single solutions.

Can you relate ? Let me know what you think about this ❤️.

04/03/2022

This comes up so often when I talk to parents - the perception that somehow because there are difficult moments and times when things are just not going the way they hoped - this means they are not coping.

I really want you to know this - to cope does not mean you will not have tough times or times when you genuinely struggle - coping is more about going through these tough times and finding our way, using whatever resources we can.

We are often mis-sold the perception that it is all or nothing - you’re either coasting through and everything is a breeze or you are struggling and a hot mess - and therefore “failing.”

Let’s start normalising the reality of parenting - it’s hard work! One of the biggest journeys of your life and likely one of the most humbling !

09/02/2022

parental stress is something that so many parents I work with experience. Bringing light to this - sharing with honesty and without judgment in itself can be such a relief. Life is so full, so busy, so demanding. Many parents are juggling so much all the time - often with very little support around. Parents are ordinary human being first and foremost - not superheros with never ending reserves - sometimes it’s tough - and that’s when we need the space to unpack all the feelings and worries that create the stress which gets in the way of us connecting with our children and being the parents we intend to be. Can you relate ? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this… #.

01/11/2021

I really love this book by Gabi Garcia () - Find Your Calm - A Mindful Approach To Relieve Anxiety and Grow Your Bravery. And illustrated beautifully by Marta Pineda

Helping children and teens to learn how to regulate their emotions does involve explicitly teaching them about tools and techniques they can use to manage their feelings.

Mindfulness techniques are great - because they help teach the idea that emotions are normal and that we can sit with our feelings even when they are uncomfortable. We can also be use simple techniques to help work through the feelings until we come back to a place of calm.

Find Your Calm - describes this in really clear and simple terms - the illustrations are great and the ideas are accessible to children from about 4 years upwards.

If you're looking for a book to read with your child or give to them as a resource they can read by themselves - this is a good option. It also gives parents a framework they can use to understand how to convey some of the language about emotion regulation.

Let us know what you think. Happy Monday and remember ... You've Got This ❤️❤️❤️

25/10/2021

At Full Circle Psychology we LOVE to work in a holistic way that takes into account all the different parts of the puzzle. Let's remember that our children and teens are often at the centre of very complex systems that they have little control over.

I often work with parents and children/teens to help untangle which parts of the system they are struggling with and think about how we can make changes that create long-lasting benefits.

It’s so important that we move away from the narrative that the child/teen “is the one who needs to change,” because most of the time they are merely reflecting the things that are going on around them.

Often, the change that is needed actually sits at the level of the family, other times it’s in the peer group, at school or in the wider community. Sometimes, it’s a combination of these different systems.

Wherever that change needs to be made – we can do it if we listen in and commit to doing the work together to bring about the changes we hope for.

Remember… You’ve Got This….❤️❤️❤️

15/10/2021

Sending you some Friday positivity.

It's been one of those rollercoaster weeks for me - lots of positives and lots of challenges to figure out. Reflecting on the week though - I will choose to focus on the steps I took towards Full Circle's goals.

I love being able to work with parents, children and teens and help to figure out "stuff" that is going on in their lives. I am always struck by the human spirit - which is full of hope and love.

No matter how tough things get - just keep reminding yourself - there is no such thing as "impossible" - Yes, there are definitely tough times, challenges and seasons of difficulty - but there is always the hope of a different tomorrow.

Take the time to rest, reset and reconnect with your loved ones. I'll see you on the other side ❤️❤️🤘🏽🤘🏽

via .app

15/10/2021

08/10/2021

My daughter wrote a poem for week - and I was so struck by the beauty of her words.

We talked about the meaning of her poem and what she wanted to convey - she told me she just wanted people to know that no matter your skin colour that should not stop you from being friends and if others approach you to be your friend - then accept them.

I desperately wish that we could all see the world through eyes like this - reminding us that we are all wonderfully made and human first of all.

As parents it gave us hope that having the conversations about race and heritage do make a difference. So let's keep these conversations going and let's make the experiences of the next generations a more harmonious one ❤️❤️❤️

Here we LOVE to hear your stories and musings about experiences - so do share with us! Link in Bio 👆🏽

04/10/2021

This view starts right from when babies are born - with constant questions being asked of parents... "are they sleeping through the night, walking, talking, crawling, eating solids..." the list goes on and the feeling of pressure parents often experience can be overwhelming.

It is understandable that parents form these views because information about child/teen development can often seem very "either - or" - and the systems around children/teens are often set up in a way that reinforces this view.

The reality of child development is that it is not a neat process that occurs in the same way at the same time for each and every child. Yes - there are expected ranges for when certain skills/abilities tend to develop - but there is also lots of variation.

Whilst it is important to know about and understand these stages of development - it is equally important to remember that there are LOTS of different aspects of development going on all at the same time - and some things may happen earlier or later than others.

Some aspects of development may look different altogether for your child/teen - and getting a clearer understanding of their strengths and difficulties - is an important step towards knowing how best to support YOUR child/teen.

There is no text book situation - there is a guide - and then there is reality - let's work in the reality of life and meet our children/teens where they are at in their own developmental journey.

If you have concerns/worries - it's right to ask a professional for advice - that's what we all trained so hard for 😅😅.

Remember ... You've Got This...❤️❤️❤️

28/09/2021

Understanding what's causing behaviours in our children and teens, helps us to see the possibilities for change.

As parents when we go from feeling lost and helpless to feeling that we can make sense of a situation and take actions that can make a difference, we feel hopeful and empowered.

For parents this is so important, because often the first thing we are confronted with is our children/teens behaviours. That is often the way they communicate - it can be raw, real and unfiltered. This can be a challenge for parents, particularly when the behaviours cause distress.

Gaining an understanding of what is actually driving the behaviour moves us from a place of worry and sometimes despair - to a place where suddenly things make more sense and we can make clearer decisions about what to do next.

So go on - reach out and ask for help - bringing things to the light can be the start of a profoundly life changing experience.

Remember... You've Got This ❤️❤️❤️

13/09/2021

Our children’s/teen’s feelings are valid … no matter the situation…

07/09/2021

Read our blog post for 5 tips to support your child/teen as they go back to school

www.wearefullcircle.co/blog/five-tips-to-support-your-childteen-as-they-return-to-school

After months off, children and teens are returning to school and will have lots of adjustments to make, big and small. The summer months have likely been a chance for children and teens to slow down the pace of academic learning or maybe even switch off from it all together. Now they are back into

15/06/2021

Watch this chat on our Instagram profile

https://www.instagram.com/tv/CQJBdrrlWNv/?utm_medium=copy_link

20/03/2021

20/03/2021