Agnes P Counselling

14/02/2024

Something that comes up with clients is comfort zone; the struggle to step outside of it and the fears around it. We explore how we can make each step bite size, until we get there, rather than trying to “eat the elephant whole!” For others it’s a case of taking the plunge in one motion and keeping momentum.

Depending on the situation, I usually need to throw myself out of my comfort zone, and hope the parachute opens mid way.

That was until my children campaigned for a dog for approximately 4 years! This was beyond “out of my comfort zone” - it wasn’t even a consideration for me. It was a hard no.

I never grew up with pets and felt indifferent with other people’s. To add to that, I felt I was at capacity. My life was hectic enough, without adding a dog to the mix.

Four years later, my 6 year old son was suffering low self esteem at school. We felt powerless to change this, even with all that we had tried. The one thing that always brought him enormous joy was nature and animals.

In a snap decision, I questioned, should we get him the dog he had longed for? My husband meticulously researched the dog that would fit with our family, and before I knew it, we were buying a 10 week old whippet, and our children named her Ruby.

I felt apprehensive as all of Ruby’s doggy paraphernalia arrived in the week leading up to her joining us. The first few days of having Ruby felt overwhelming. Life had changed again.

Ruby is almost 8 months now. I am besotted with her. I thought I was at capacity, and yet, I have more to give, as I have so much love for my little girl.

I would never advocate irresponsibly taking on the care of a living being. Please consider your support network and your availability before you take the plunge.

My husband and I work from home and we have a wonderful dog walker who takes Ruby, and she frolics with her doggy buddies. Ryan really is a very important and special part of Ruby’s life.

Did you notice that Ruby has a ❤️on her nose?
Just one of the adorable attributes that my little baby has. I couldn’t resist posting it today of all days 😉

Much love to you all 💕

25/09/2023

https://youtu.be/qKqj85oo2wI?si=NHJmGp3fS2t0oOx1

CHEF’S TABLE

Anyone watched this series on Netflix?

It was recommended to me by a good friend, a couple of years ago, and I watched all six seasons.

I initially started watching it as I have always enjoyed seeing people create culinary delights, but this series was quite different.

Whilst it delivered on culinary creativity and beauty, there was an intense focus on each of the successful chefs’/restauranteurs’ personalities, psychologies, motivations, influences and challenges.

For me, it was a wonderful tour of different countries, diversity of ethnic heritage, personal stories (adversity, health, breaking the mould…the list is endless), and a thread that ran throughout all the stories; resilience and self belief.

To quote one restauranteur in the series:
“If you’re a very driven person, there’s a point where you can hurt a lot of people.”

This series really gave me food for thought (yes, I know!), as it was eye opening and educational. It opened up different perspectives, motivations and possibilities.

Chef's Table goes inside the lives and kitchens of six of the world's most renowned international chefs. Each episode focuses on a single chef, featuring Ben...

24/12/2022

Just a reminder that there is always someone to talk to, and not just at Christmas. Highly trained, compassionate and caring individuals are at the end of the line, if you need them.

20/11/2022

For some, diagnosis is a relief, whilst for others it’s a label and a hurdle. There are many stories on this site, and all very different. Alex’s story was the last one I viewed, so I thought I would share. If you have some time, take a look at a few of the stories. They all provide valuable insights.
…and Alex raises an important point, about the difference between male and female presentation of autism, which is so often missed in wider society.

Alexs story

23/09/2022

Such a joy to be at this multitalented lady’s book launch last night.
Katy is a psychotherapist, journalist, founder and host of the podcast Sound Affects (exploring mental health in the music industry) and now an author (!) who I hugely admire.
Thank you for my signed copy of your book, Katy!
I am really looking forward to introducing this book to some of my clients.
I think we can all take something from your book ❤️

11/08/2022

"I think aging is something that you either have to decide that you like it or you don't. It's a choice."

For some, ageing represents evolving beauty and for others it’s a loss of beautiful youth.
We all feel differently about ageing and should do what is comfortable for us, without judgement or shame.
I really liked this article.

"I think aging is something that you either have to decide that you like it or you don't. It's a choice."

09/05/2022

I never thought I would be willingly posting a picture of my side profile, after spending my youth resenting and disliking my nose. In fact, my younger self would have wanted to destroy any evidence of such pictures.

I was blissfully unaware of my growing nose (funny that it’s right in the middle of my face and yet it escaped me) until boys/young men decided it was important for me to know how unattractive my nose made me. Yes, it was crushing and made me very self conscious. I always knew that surgery was an option but I also knew I would never take it, as I wouldn’t be doing it for me but to appeal to the people who were cruel and the irony is, none of these people were my type or important to me, so why would I do it for anyone but me?

I spent years scrutinising my nose and comparing it to other girls/women with larger noses and wondered if they cared so much about theirs? I even caught myself being surprised at the number of women who I thought were attractive with their big noses.

As time went on, I surprisingly had people tell me that they liked my nose and longer noses generally. I wondered if they needed help/an eye test and concluded that they were lying to be kind. I am sure some were and some would have been genuine.

Now, in my 40’s and working in mental health, seeing the young people and adults that I do, I realise we are all vulnerable in one way or another and we have the choice to make a change or to accept and make the best of it. I have realised there is a market for everyone in this world. We are all appealing to some people in some ways and not to others. Life isn’t black and white and neither is subjective taste.

It took me a long time to accept my face and bizarrely, now that I am living with my fine lines, dryer hair and tired eyes, I prefer me right now and my nose is somewhere, in the background, but definitely not the main event for me.
Why? Because I am content and I realise, I am made up of so many components and I am more than just my nose.

Oh and I don’t know how or why but I think I rather like it! Yep, you read that correctly. I like it!

27/03/2022

✨Legacy
✨Life beyond death
✨Sewing the seeds for future generations
✨Small acts, big impacts
✨Circle of life
✨”Everything you see exists together in a delicate balance” King Mufasa, The Lion King

22/03/2022

Karl Nova the award winning poet, author and hip hop artist visited my daughter’s school a year ago. She was so excited to tell me all about the engaging way in which Karl communicated to a group of young people and that she felt inspired. We read a couple of his books together and his honesty and writing style enabled some great conversations between my daughter and I. Everything from: race, culture, colour, opportunities, prejudice, remaining authentic even when we are conditioned to be conventionally acceptable. Great work, Karl!

22/03/2022

So succinctly and accurately said.
Why do we do this? Fear of judgement? Shame? Saying it out loud and feeling the pain as it passes our lips and leaks from our eyes? And then what? Once the pain is released in our own unique way…once that step has been taken…maybe that’s one less pain buried deep inside burdening our souls.
Find your own unique way to release and keep at it.
In the words of John Heywood (playwright and poet): “Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour.”

04/02/2022

“Everything you read into other people’s faces maybe…what you are yourself”
Cat Stevens (now Yusef Islam)
Earth Tour, 1976.

Even if you don’t listen to the song, if you have a minute, check out what he says before he plays Sad Lisa at his live Earth Tour concert.
What do you think? To me, it feels like had a good sense of self awareness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oa_ExklvKH0

I grew up listening to a lot of his music as my mum loved his music (she still does). My early memories of Cat Stevens will always be the Tea for the Tillerman vinyl cover, sitting by the record player. It looked like something out of Enid Blyton and captured my imagination; it was strange and inviting all at once.

13/12/2021

you have such a lovely way with words (and illustrations). I often reflect with clients (especially my younger ones) that life and our experiences are transient, both good and bad. This example resonates beautifully 💛