Dr Kaur Therapy

Dr Kaur Therapy Helping you Conquer your Inner Critic - Online Only - 1:1 Therapy & Group programme for work anxiety

I am a British born Punjabi Sikh female who specialises in helping people manage their hidden hurts. I work in a trauma informed way as I believe that our life experiences impact who we are and how we show up in the world. I see clients I work with being held in a certain point in their lives unable to move forward due to some unhelpful beliefs they have. So in a rapidly changing world, I want to help people move through those blocks so live life according to their values rather than limited by their past.

10/09/2025

“How are you?” doesn’t cut it anymore.

Most people reply “I’m fine” when they’re not.

Here’s the reality:

🧠 7,055 people died by su***de in the UK last year
📅 That’s 19 lives lost every single day
😔 Most showed no visible signs
😶 Most never reached out for help
💔 Most left behind people who wish they’d checked in sooner

It’s not always the loud cry for help.

Sometimes it’s silence.
Sometimes it’s that friend who seems busy and “okay.”
Sometimes it’s you.

So what can you actually do, this week, in under 10 minutes?

👉 Reach out to someone you haven’t spoken to in a while.
Not with gossip.
Not with small talk.
Not with “hey, long time no see.”

Try:
"Thinking of you today. How are you really doing?"

This one message can interrupt a downward spiral.
This one moment can remind someone they’re not alone.

And don’t forget yourself either.

Ask:
🧩 What stories am I telling myself today?
🪞 Would I speak to a friend the way I speak to myself?
🤍 Where can I be kinder to my mind?

You don’t have to fix everything.
But you do have to try.

One real check-in can save a life.
Maybe even yours.

When we grow up between cultures, we start to notice the spaces in-between.Family vs. WorldAt home, we were told one thi...
10/09/2025

When we grow up between cultures, we start to notice the spaces in-between.

Family vs. World

At home, we were told one thing. Outside, the rules were different. We carried the weight of both. We knew they shouldn’t mix.

Language vs. Silence

We translated words, feelings, even emotions. Speaking one way at home, another way at school. Sometimes that gift made us proud. Other times, it left us feeling split, not quite sure where we belonged.

Belonging vs. Nowhere

We belonged everywhere and nowhere at once. Familiar in both spaces, fully claimed by neither.

Strength vs. Ache

These gaps gave us resilience and empathy. But they also left invisible bruises, the constant adjusting, the unspoken exhaustion of never fully landing.

The Therapy Gap

When we talk about the therapy gap, it isn’t only about access to services. It’s about these unseen spaces that shaped us and hindered the growth of our authentic selves, the gaps in identity, in safety, in being truly seen.

💭 Which “gap” shaped you most? And what would it feel like to have a space where we don’t need to translate or shrink?

✨ Our free guide, You Are Not Too Much - You Are Unlearning the Noise, is about naming those spaces and beginning to build safety within.

🔗 Link in bio to download.

So many of us were taught that confidence is about performance: being louder in the room, collecting achievements, polis...
21/08/2025

So many of us were taught that confidence is about performance: being louder in the room, collecting achievements, polishing the façade so nobody sees the cracks.

Add race to the mix, and migration and confidence and success are hard-wired into the very core. Education - job - status.

But if you’ve lived with trauma or imposter syndrome, those rules don’t free you; they trap you.

They keep you hustling, proving, and pretending… while inside you’re still waiting to feel “enough.”

So I’d like to ask you:

✨ Have you ever noticed how your confidence collapses the moment you make a mistake?
✨ Do you find yourself preparing endlessly, just so no one can “catch you out”?
✨ Or do you stay quiet in meetings, telling yourself you’ll speak up when you finally feel ready, but that day never comes?

These aren’t signs of weakness.
They’re signs of a nervous system shaped by old experiences, doing its best to protect you.
Real confidence doesn’t come from pushing harder; it comes from building safety inside yourself so you can show up authentically.

* Confidence is not something you’re born with or without.

It’s something you can relearn.

If this resonates, I share more reflections like this in my newsletter - gentle prompts, insights, and trauma-informed strategies to help you rebuild self-trust.

📩 You can join through the link in my bio.

💡 Save this as a reminder

For now, let me know: what did you grow up being told about confidence?

16/05/2025

Why does rejection still hurt—even years later?

In my work with EMDR clients, I often see how deeply rejection leaves its mark. It can show up in ways like:

➤ Being excluded or bullied at school
➤ Feeling emotionally distant or unseen by parents
➤ Sudden breakups that felt like being abandoned
➤ Friendships that ended without explanation
➤ Growing apart or being estranged from family or adult children

These moments don’t just disappear with time. They stay with us. And often, clients quietly ask:

What did I do wrong?
Why does this still sting?
Why can’t I just forget it and move on?

Here’s something important to understand:

Repeated rejection can actually train your nervous system to treat relationships as unsafe.
You might find yourself shutting down.
Or saying yes when you want to say no—just to keep the peace.
Or constantly bracing for someone to leave again.

This is rejection trauma.
It’s very real—and more common than most people talk about.

In EMDR therapy—whether it’s weekly sessions or a more focused intensive format—we gently work with these memories and the beliefs that came from them. You’re not “too much.” You’re not broken. You’re someone who’s been hurt—and who deserves healing.

Over time, many clients begin to:

➤ Feel more grounded and emotionally steady
➤ Build relationships that feel safer and more honest
➤ Stop people-pleasing or avoiding conflict out of fear
➤ Reconnect with parts of themselves they thought were gone

If any of this sounds familiar, you’re definitely not alone—and you don’t have to keep carrying it all by yourself.

Wondering if EMDR therapy might help you move forward?

Let’s have that conversation. https://drkaurtherapy.com/

13/05/2025

Mental health support shouldn’t take 18 months

But for 1 in 4 people in the UK, it does.

Imagine needing help... and waiting a year and a half for someone to call you back.

While physical health gets priority, mental health funding is shrinking.

- Su***de rates are the highest since 1999
- Young people are self-harming more than ever
- You're 8x more likely to wait over 18 months for mental health support than for physical treatment

This isn't just a health issue.
It's a crisis that affects jobs, families, schools, and whole communities.

So a group of 37 organisations, including:

🩺 Royal College of Psychiatrists
🧠 Rethink Mental Illness
🕊️ Mind UK
🏥 Centre for Mental Health
..have demanded the government stop treating symptoms and start fixing causes.

This means:
- Supporting mental health in schools
- Providing safe homes
- Reforming welfare to promote wellbeing
- Building local mental health centres

Mark Winstanley said it straight:

“We can’t treat our way out of this. We must prevent it.”

Mental health isn't a side issue.
It’s the backbone of a stable society.

Do you agree that the government needs a real strategy for mental health?

Not everything in therapy looks like a massive breakthrough.
Sometimes it’s quiet. Gentle. A tiny shift.
But those momen...
09/04/2025

Not everything in therapy looks like a massive breakthrough.
Sometimes it’s quiet.
Gentle.
A tiny shift.
But those moments? They matter more than you think. 💬🧠✨

Swipe through for the kinds of things your therapist quietly celebrates — the signs that healing is happening, even if it doesn’t feel big or loud 💥📢

If this resonated with you, I share more reflections like this in my newsletter — a soft, thoughtful space where I write as a clinical psychologist, trauma specialist, EMDR practitioner and a person who has lived through pain and who cares.

Real talk about healing, nervous system care, boundaries, attachment, trauma and the (very human) process of becoming. 💌

👉 Tap the link in my bio to join — I’d love to have you there

And tell me below: which one of these have you said, or wanted to say?

21/03/2025

As a part of of role as a clinical psychologist I am required to do a lot of ongoing training - CPD. As I am also an EMDR practitioner I am attending the EMDR UK Annual Conference & AGM 2025 remotely. I love this part of my work as I get to be at the forefront of learning about advancements in my area of expertise.

If you are seeing a therapist please make sure they are accredited as it means they are obliged to continue to learn and keep updated with knowledge

Let’s redefine what it means to have strength during grief 💔“You’re so strong.” I’ve heard this so many times since my b...
18/03/2025

Let’s redefine what it means to have strength during grief 💔

“You’re so strong.”

I’ve heard this so many times since my brother passed away. As a therapist it’s left me with an uneasy feeling. For me, strength is about letting parts of ourselves fall apart and rebuild.

Strength isn’t about hiding pain—it’s about honouring it, feeling it, and trusting yourself to carry it in your own way.

Swipe through this post to explore:

🖤 Why the traditional view of “strength” in grief is flawed
🌀 A grief model that actually reflects real-life experience
💧 The science behind why crying is healing
🤍 How to embrace your emotions without guilt

You don’t have to do this alone.

If you’re struggling with grief and need a safe space to process your emotions, I’m here to help.

📩 DM me or click the link in my bio to book a session. You deserve support. 🤍

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London

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 3pm
Tuesday 9am - 3pm
Wednesday 9am - 3pm
Thursday 9am - 3pm
Friday 9am - 2pm

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