18/04/2025
💬 Regulation Before Reasoning🔥
You can’t teach a child in meltdown mode.
And you definitely can’t discipline them into regulation. When a child is dysregulated — yelling, hitting, crying, hiding — their brain is in survival mode, not learning mode.
🧠 What’s happening in the brain?
In meltdown mode, the amygdala (fear center) has taken over.
Logic, empathy, and reasoning live in the prefrontal cortex — but it’s offline until the child feels safe again.
That’s why: ✅ Calm must come before correction.
✅ Connection must come before consequences.
✅ What to do instead?
Step 1: Co-regulate
Use a calm tone, get low to their level, offer safety through body language.
🗣 “I’m here.”
🗣 “Let’s breathe together.”
🗣 “You’re safe.”
Step 2: De-escalate
Reduce demands. Lower lights or noise. Remove audience if possible.
Silence is okay — calm presence is everything.
Step 3: THEN talk
Only once they are regulated and safe do we explore: 🧠 What happened?
🧠 What can we do differently next time?
💡 Remember:
Children learn how to regulate by experiencing co-regulation first.
They borrow your calm until they develop their own.
It’s not permissive — it’s therapeutic. ❤️
