Save my marriage

08/01/2026

𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝗯𝗼𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀.
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The fight isn't the problem.
Its the signal.

Arguments are symptoms.
Not the disease.

Most couples treat symptoms.
Then wonder why nothing heals.

When you miss the signal
you repeat the cycle.

How does this land for you
Did you know this already

𝗟𝗲𝘁 𝗺𝗲 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀.

07/01/2026

𝗙𝗮𝗰𝘁.
Couples rarely fight about what they're fighting about.

Not the dishes.
Not the tone.
Not the timing.

Those are just the sparks.
The real fire started earlier.

Most arguments are emotional echoes.
Unresolved moments replaying themselves.

That's why fixing the issue doesn't stop the fight.

Did you know this
or does this change how you see arguments

Comment below.

06/01/2026

Here is the 𝗯𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 during small arguments.
And its so subtle most people miss it completely.

It feels productive.
It feels mature.
It feels like youre addressing the issue.

But its actually the reason small disagreements explode into emotional stand offs.

This mistake keeps couples stuck arguing over the same things for years
even though they swear they've talked about it a hundred times.

𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘀
or you want to check whether you're making it
comment 𝗠𝗜𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗞𝗘 and Ill explain.

05/01/2026

𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗳𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴.
They fight over something they don't have words for yet.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺
they argue as if the words are the problem.

What makes this dangerous is how convincing it feels.
Every fight sounds logical.
Every complaint sounds justified.

But theres a hidden layer most couples never look at.
And that layer decides whether the fight ends in closeness or quiet resentment.

Want me to reveal what that hidden layer is
comment 𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗘𝗥 or drop a question below.

04/01/2026

I used to think we 𝗮𝗿𝗴𝘂𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴.
Dirty dishes. Tone of voice. Timing.

Then one night, mid argument, I 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘇𝗲𝗱 something unsettling.
The 𝗳𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹.

That realization changed how I hear arguments forever.
And once you see it, you cant unsee it.

𝗠𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗽𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀.
They keep fixing the surface and wondering why the same fights keep coming back.

If you want to know what I noticed in that moment
comment 𝗪𝗛𝗬 or ask me directly.

29/12/2025

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗿𝗴𝘂𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻’𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺. They’re about a hidden script 97% of people miss.

That petty fight over the toilet seat, the thermostat, or who forgot to buy milk? You’re not actually arguing about that. You’re following a neurological script written during a tense moment you’ve likely completely forgotten. Your brain has connected a minor annoyance to a primal fear—and it’s hijacking the conversation every single time.

The solution isn’t “better communication.” It’s finding the one, specific sentence that acts as a “circuit breaker” for that script. There’s a way to spot it in under 60 seconds, but almost no one does, because they’re too busy defending their side of a fight that’s really about something else entirely.

What’s your most common “small thing” fight? Comment below with one word (e.g., “LAUNDRY,” “PUNCTUALITY,” “REMOTE”). If I get enough replies, I’ll make a follow-up post breaking down the exact “circuit breaker” phrase for the top 3 answers.

28/12/2025

𝗪𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗳𝗳 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘄𝗲𝗱𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝗱𝗲𝗯𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘄𝗮𝘀𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗹𝗼𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗽𝘆 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴.

For months, I thought the problem was the spoons facing up or down. My fiancé was convinced I was doing it on purpose to annoy him. We’d have the same exhausting, ridiculous fight every single night. It wasn’t about the dishes. It was about a tiny, almost imperceptible phrase I was using—and I had no idea I was even saying it.

Our therapist had us record one of these arguments. When I listened back, I heard it. A single word, hiding in plain sight. That word was a trapdoor, and every time I said it, we’d fall right back into the fight.

I’m not ready to share the word just yet, because the real shock wasn’t the word itself… it was the hidden need it was screaming for.

Want me to reveal the word and the simple 3-step “𝗿𝗲𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗱” technique that stopped our fights for good? Comment “DISHWASHER” and I’ll DM you the details.

29/10/2025

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗗𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺𝘀 — 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗡𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗦𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺𝘀.

Most couples think they need better communication.
But that’s not true.

You don’t fight because you don’t understand each other —
You fight because your bodies don’t feel safe with each other.

When your nervous system detects threat, it shuts down logic.
Your brain stops listening and starts protecting.

So you talk louder. They shut down.
You withdraw. They chase.
Both of you think the other is the problem.

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 — 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗽𝗵𝘆𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹.

If you learn to calm your body before you speak,
you’ll stop fighting to be right
and start fighting to feel safe — together.

❤️ Learn to deactivate the argument before it starts.
👉 https://godwantsyoumarried.com/the-conflict-deactivator

29/10/2025

𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗻𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗺𝘆. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝘀𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝗶𝘀 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘀𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗱.

That’s the secret most couples never learn.

When tension rises, you’re not fighting each other —
you’re fighting two dysregulated nervous systems trying to feel safe again.

The yelling, the withdrawal, the silence —
all of it is just the body’s way of saying, “I don’t feel safe.”

You can’t fix that with words.
𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗶𝘅 𝗶𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗺.
With tone. With pause. With presence.

Because whoever regulates first, heals both.

❤️ That’s what emotional leadership looks like.
That’s how peace begins.

✨ 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗻 how to 𝗿𝗲𝗴𝘂𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲, reconnect, and rebuild — even in the 𝗺𝗶𝗱𝗱𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺.
👉 https://godwantsyoumarried.com/the-conflict-deactivator

The Conflict Deactivator Guide gives you instant, word-for-word scripts to stop blow-ups, set boundaries, and protect your peace—without shutting down or losing your cool.No more spirals. Just calm, clarity, and control – on demand.

29/10/2025

Ever wonder why “t𝗮𝗹𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘁 𝗼𝘂𝘁" makes things worse?

Because your partner isn’t hearing your words —
They’re 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝘀𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺.

Tone sharper. Shoulders tighter.
Heart rate faster. Voice louder.

Their body copies yours automatically.
Now both of you are on defense,
fighting a battle your biology started before your words did.

This isn’t a communication issue — 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝗴𝘂𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗲.
Whoever calms first wins the connection.
Because a regulated partner is louder than any argument.

💡 The strongest person in the room isn’t the loudest —
It’s the one whose nervous system stays grounded when everything else is on fire.

🔥 Learn how to stay calm when everything’s burning.
👉 https://godwantsyoumarried.com/the-conflict-deactivator

20/09/2025

https://godwantsyoumarried.com/the-conflict-deactivator/