03/06/2025
Sometimes, your child won't want to be held and don't force it. But if we can stay calm, meet the feeling, not the behaviour, then co-regulation can happen. When we hold our child, there is a physical change. Their nervous system will mirror ours. We just have to wait for the fire to go out.
Co-regulation doesn’t have to involve hugging. Some kids won’t calm when held, but doesn’t mean that you can’t co-regulate. Being close and calm will still impact your child’s nervous system and eventually calm too. When you label the feeling for your child rather than reacting to the behaviour, they feel heard and understood. When they are ready, you can work it out together
More information on my book
Guidance from The Therapist Parent
Available on my website www.thetherapistparent.com and Amazon
https://www.thetherapistparent.com/post/co-regulating-with-children-of-all-ages