Ella Bailey Doula, Newport

02/02/2024

Imbolc yesterday was a quiet one but altar turn around today with a friend and it's all about the girls this spring.

11/12/2023

Witchy s**t with the Coven to release some stuff before the retrograde and hopefully see us through to the other side without too much collateral damage. Nobody levitated so we're just the right side of the kooky/unhinged line.

21/09/2023

Happy Mabon somehow doesn't feel quite right for this liminal time of the year. Cosy? Too trite. Safe Mabon, then; may this equinox find you warm, protected and thoughtful. Everyone in my life seems to be brooding at the moment, on the cusp on change but not ready to make great leaps just at this moment, instead reflecting on things that turned out not to be as shiny as they seemed on the surface and rooting out what needs to go in their life to make way for the seeds and bulbs - literal and figurative - we plant now to store up their energy for the burst of glory we hope for in the spring. This time of year is as important as the flashier points in the calendar.

I've been very quiet lately, but still busy. My focus has been on spell work, with friends bringing me requests that bring us together as muddy hippies over tea, tequila and roses. This is my working plan for the foreseeable. Not birth work, although it may occasionally find me despite my not looking, as it tends to do, but life work.

Autumn to me is a deeper cleanse than spring as I feel compelled to get my house in order ready to make it my almost exclusive habitat for the next five or six months. Bay, mugwort and rosemary sit with the fennel and lemon from a cleansing ritual done earlier in the year on my incense burner to chase away the unwanted shadows and welcome in those that might protect us and instead of my usual libations of wine or whiskey, seeds and dried fruit go into the cup and my own mouth and the ritual drags me out of the funk I woke up in.

Create your own magic, wherever you can.🤎🧡🖤

07/06/2023

Sometimes you don't book the client - not everyone who gets in touch is the right match and sometimes people realise they're just not in a position to use doula support right now. BUT frequently when this happens I've signposted to other resources or professionals and today I heard that a non-client had followed through and got in touch with my favourite IBCLC for some really specialist breastfeeding support and, knowing as I do from personal experience with her sorting out all three of my painful feeders, this genuinely makes me happier than getting a client booked in for myself. If I'm honest, I'm not that desperate to book as many clients as possible - I'm very happy getting by and value time over money, so maybe that's why I really don't mind when the right support turns out to be someone else.

PFA of my dog, Darcy, enjoying a relaxing snooze after a heavy day of doing not very much, because she is way more popular than me.

18/05/2023

New Moon cleanse ready for some fun stuff tomorrow. I'd apologise for the radio silence but those who know me know I wouldn't mean it. Who else is blowing the dust off their life this week?

06/04/2023

"If it sounds like bulls**t, it probably is bulls**t"

My client on the lies and waffle the NHS tells pregnant women to get them to be good and shut up.

26/03/2023

Playing catch up again because I just had to post this photo of me fangirling with Gemma from YES Matters UK along with two of the fantastic organisers and attendees at the workshop I attended this Friday. The work Gemma is doing could not be more important and relevant right now and if you are a parent, or professional working with kids and young people, feeling out of your depth and wondering just how great exactly the impact of s*xism and internet p**n culture is on our children in this online world that is so different to the one we grew up in you simply must follow her work.

Due to an overwhelming meltdown the previous night (for those who don't know, I am autistic) I was delayed in getting there but I am so glad I pushed myself to go. It was so worthwhile. The information was pretty terrifying, I'll be honest, but it's what's happening to our kids and we cannot turn away from that simply because it's painful to look at.

Alongside Gemma, every woman in the room was a veteran of women's s*x based rights and I could honestly have spent a week there and still not feel I had learnt all they had to teach me. As usual, I over shared and talked too much, but I was given such grace and understanding that I felt bouyed in a way only time with women can do. Heartfelt thanks to everyone I met that day.x

23/03/2023

Big babies aren't the terrifying, vag destroying horror they're usually made out to be in the media and it's fantastic to finally start seeing coverage catching up with this. In fact, big babies can often be easier to birth because they have gravity on their side!

This incredible woman and mother has not only smashed it out of the park by placing herself and her birth preferences squarely at the centre of experience, as they should be, but by sharing her story she is helping let other women know they too have the choice to give birth however they want. Full respect, Mama, this doula salutes you!

Ruth's six year old asked why mummy 'sounded like a cow' during labour

20/03/2023

I'm not good at posting in real time on 'days', because I'm generally busy doing stuff, so I'm catching up today.

I'm seeing a lot of posts from mothers still dealing with the fall out and anxiety from not feeling seen or appreciated on Mothering Sunday. I got a lie in and an apology because he didn't get me anything - our youngest was ill and it took up a lot of time and energy in the run up. I went out and got myself plants and Belgian buns while he painted the skirting boards in my boys' new room. I had a wonderful Mothering Sunday.

BUT this isn't me s**tting on other mother's for complaining about not getting spoilt on a day that's supposed to be about them. Consider this a shout out to the partners of those women, to whom I want to say this: if she's still upset you didn't spoil her on Mother's Day, it probably means you're not doing enough to show her she's important the rest of the time. Because here's the thing - I am a Queen in my house. No exaggeration; I'm left in no doubt that I am pretty much a supreme being in my husband's eyes on a daily basis. He's trained the kids to come and tell me I'm the most beautiful woman in the world and my youngest won't leave a supermarket without flowers for me. So I really don't give a s**t if he's too busy looking after us all to do the same thing on one particular day that he does the rest of the year.

If, however, you can't be bothered to put in that level of effort on a daily basis, and you have a woman you love and want to keep, I seriously suggest upping your game next birthday, Mother's Day etc. Don't let her feel like she's invisible to you. If she's pi**ed off, there's probably a reason. BUY HER SOME FU***NG FLOWERS! 🙄😾🤬

12/03/2023

Before the weekend is over, the one and only picture I took during the International Women's Day event organised by the wonderful Sally-anne Evans and colleagues and volunteers at the Riverfront in Newport. I wasn't able to make most of the events this year but snagged some childcare long enough to listen to a couple of talks on how disability affects women and managed to catch the last part of the opening of the Windrush Generation exhibition which will remain there and is well worth a visit.

I've been unusually quite this IWD because, like many who work in women focussed fields, I am feeling a bit disillusioned and disheartened about the whole thing. But women's right, voices and movements have never been without their battles and women with far less, up against far more than me always have, do and will find the resilience to keep going anyway. So I shall continue to be as much of a pain in the arse as I can manage because women were not locked up, force fed and tortured for my rights just for me to kick my heels up. Events like this remind me of that and I'm grateful I live in a place filled with such a diversity of women from whom I can always draw inspiration when I need it.

10/03/2023

"Why is this bread bin full of socks?" and "Why is there guinea pig poo in the snack tray?" are just some of the questions that you too can ask yourself if you have children.

I was going to post something more profound today to let you all know I am still here and still just crap at updating my page but, for obvious reasons, I am too knackered to compose anything beyond a whinge about my kids - who I adore but can tell apart by the smell of their farts and that's something nobody told me about parenting.

14/02/2023

As I am spoilt of a more of less daily basis we tend not to really do valentine's day, however I have celebrated my love for myself - because that's something that was harder to win than anyone else's love - by buying two new jars I found in a charity shop, which I intend to fill with homemade bath salts tonight as a further present to myself - and finally collecting the new crystals and candle I bought from Quartz Candle Club (who I am unable to tag ). I am so excited about this evening - I need to make this house smell like we don't live here and this candle is going to do that!

I'm not normally a fan of scented candles as they give me headaches and make me feel like I'm in a sweetie factory, but this blend has been absolutely perfected and it shows. Gorgeous floral essential oils in there that I can't wait to have take over my house.✨🔮💐🌷🌹🌞💝

01/02/2023

I don't usually post how my altar ends up once I've refreshed it but IT'S JUST SO PRETTY! The picture above was a housewarming present to myself when I moved into my first house. At the time I was in an abusive relationship - although I wouldn't realise that until over a decade after we'd split up - so this is a really important picture to me as it wasn't shared, it was just mine. Whenever I move it's the first thing that goes up, and it's always in a prominent place. My reminder that sometimes it's ok to put myself first, even when it's not useful to others.

And in case anyone was wondering, I thought I'd show you the inside of my treasure box.🔮✨⭐🪙

01/02/2023

The box is back out! Happy Imbolc to anyone celebrating on this bright, sunny day.

I usually keep my rose quartz in the bathroom but at least some of it will be moving downstairs today as I'll be centering my Imbolc altar around it. Pinks and blues for me right now - no explanation as to why, just cause I fancy it. Thank you and welcome to all my new followers. 🌷🌈🥰