What are the opening hours?

Monday 9am - 5pm Tuesday 9am - 5pm Wednesday 9am - 5pm Thursday 9am - 5pm Friday 9am - 5pm

Accanto Counselling, Newton Abbot (2025)

20/10/2025

Self: The Compass in the Unknown 🧭

Sometimes our parts find themselves heading into unfamiliar territory,
a life transition,
a difficult conversation,
new healing work,
or simply facing the uncertain future.
The anxious parts start scanning for danger.
The controlling parts try to map out every possible outcome.
The young parts might feel scared and want to turn back.

Here's what parts often don't realise:

They're not navigating alone.
Self isn't necessarily leading the expedition with a detailed map and itinerary,
but Self is holding the compass.
Self always knows where true North is.

What this means:

Even when we don't know what's coming, even when the path ahead is unclear, Self can orient us toward our values,
our groundedness,
our authentic direction.
Self doesn't promise to eliminate the unknown, but it offers something steadier:
an internal reference point that doesn't shift with circumstances.

When parts trust Self with the compass:

• The anxious part doesn't have to predict every danger
• The controlling part can relax its grip on outcomes
• The young parts can be curious about the journey rather than terrified
• The whole system can move forward, even without certainty

True North isn't about knowing the future, it's about staying connected to what matters most: Compassion, Curiosity, Courage, Clarity, Calm, Confidence, Creativity, and Connectedness. These qualities of Self remain constant, even when everything else feels unstable.

A gentle reminder:
Your parts don't need to have all the answers before taking the next step. They just need to trust that Self is holding the compass, always able to find true North, your authentic centre, no matter how unfamiliar the terrain.

The unknown is still unknown.

But you're not lost.

13/10/2025

The Two Sides of My Personality (And All the Others Too!) 🎭
(Credit to whoever first captured the pic below)

This image perfectly encapsulates something we may all experience at some time, the dramatic contrasts within us.
Pictured here is the edgy rebel and the peaceful monk.
The chaos and the calm.
The one who wants to burn it all down and the one who seeks serenity.
And yes, these parts deeply resonate with my system! 😆

Parts by the way, can come in all shapes and sizes, gendered or genderless, as creatures, textures colours or however they personally register with you.

Here's what IFS teaches us:

We're not just two sides, we're an entire internal family.
There's a part that may crave adventure and a part that might need routine.
A social butterfly perhaps and the hermit.
A perfectionist and a spontaneous free spirit.
A cynic and an optimist.
A warrior and a gentle soul.

And the truth?

These seemingly contradictory parts don't have to be at war.
They can actually coexist, cooperate, and even complement each other when Self is leading.

The edgy part doesn't have to destroy the peaceful part.
The monk doesn't have to suppress the rebel.
Instead, they can take turns, each offering their unique gifts when the situation calls for it.

What this looks like in practice:

• The fierce protector part and the tender caregiver can both have their place
• A driven achiever and a rest loving part can learn to work together
• A serious, responsible part and a playful part can share space in your life

The goal isn't to pick one side or eliminate the ‘bad’ parts - there are of course no bad parts in IFS.
The hope, perhaps is Self leadership, where all parts feel heard, valued, and trusted to contribute their strengths without taking over the whole system.

A reflection:

What seemingly opposite parts live inside you?
What would it be like if they didn't have to compete, but could collaborate?

Your internal diversity isn't a problem to solve! it's the richness of being fully human.
All your parts belong. 💫

06/10/2025

‘This author has a bad case of himself...’ 📚

I came across this Amazon review recently and it made me laugh out loud,
because aren't we all sometimes accused (by our own parts!) of having ‘a bad case of ourselves’?

The Inner Critic's favourite lines:

• ‘Who do you think you are?’
• ‘You're being too much’
• ‘Stop showing off’
• ‘You need to tone it down’
• ‘Nobody wants to hear all that’

There's often a part of us, perhaps a protective manager part, that's deeply worried we're
taking up too much space,
being too visible, or
expressing ourselves too freely.
This part may have learned somewhere that being ‘too much yourself’ is unsafe.

What this part might really be protecting:

Young parts that were shamed for their enthusiasm, creativity, or authentic expression.
Maybe you were told to be quieter, smaller, more modest.
Maybe being fully yourself led to rejection or ridicule.

So now there's a part that acts like an internal Amazon reviewer, critiquing every time you dare to be authentically, unapologetically you.

Here's the truth Self knows:

The world doesn't need less of you, it invites you to stop apologising for being yourself.
Your ‘bad case of yourself’ might actually be your greatest gift trying to emerge.

A gentle question for your inner critic:

What if the parts of you that feel ‘too much’ are actually exactly right?
What if the world needs your particular flavour of enthusiasm, passion, creativity, or perspective?

Your authentic self isn't a disease to cure, it's the medicine the world might be crying out for right now.

Go ahead, have a gloriously bad case of yourself. 💫

29/09/2025

I don’t know about you, but music plays (excuse the pun!) a large part in my life.

My playlists look a little strange because my parts have such differing tastes.
Often they can express themselves in a happy, loud and energetic track and at other times they might want to sit quietly and listen to something sad and reflective.

The track I’ve used below has been a favourite of mine for many years. The sound alone, for me, speaks of Summer memories, and of sun.

🎵 Song for the Part That’s Ready to Grow

“Bloom” by The Paper Kites

This tender, acoustic song speaks to the part of us that’s been waiting - perhaps in the shadows, perhaps feeling stuck, but is finally ready to unfold.
There’s something about the gentle melody and soft vocals that feels like an invitation rather than a demand.

Which parts might connect:

• The part that’s been protecting itself by staying small
• Young parts that are ready to trust again
• The creative part that’s been waiting for permission to emerge
Parts that have been in survival mode and are sensing it might be safe to bloom

Why this song works for parts work:
The song captures that delicate moment when something inside us shifts from hiding to emerging.
It doesn’t rush the process, there’s patience in the music itself, like it understands that blooming happens in its own time.

Reflection invitation:

What part of you feels ready to bloom?
What would that part need to feel safe enough to unfold?

What songs help your parts feel safe to emerge?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8inJtTG_DuU

22/09/2025

📣 Su***de Prevention Month is recognised in September.
It can serve as a reminder that we all have a role in supporting those struggling with

**‘Do You Have 8 Minutes?’

When Parts Hesitate to Reach Out ⏰

Sometimes the most profound healing happens not in grand gestures,
but in simple moments of genuine connection.

The 8-Minute Help Challenge reminds us that when someone is struggling,
they don’t always need solutions, they just need to feel seen and heard.

The beautiful simplicity:
When someone asks ‘Do you have 8 minutes?’ they’re signalling they need your undivided attention.
Not advice.
Not fixing.
Just presence.
Eight minutes of putting down your phone, closing the laptop, and truly being with them.

But here’s what often happens inside us:
There’s usually a part that hesitates before reaching out. This part might whisper:
‘You’re being a burden,’
‘They’re too busy,’
‘Your problems aren’t that important,’ or
‘You should be able to handle this alone.’

This protective part learned somewhere along the way that asking for help isn’t safe,
maybe your needs were dismissed, or you were told to be strong, or you experienced disappointment when you reached out before.

When Self steps in:
Self can gently acknowledge this hesitant part:
‘I see how you’re trying to protect us from rejection or disappointment.
That makes sense given what we’ve experienced.’
From Self, we can also recognise:
‘And… we deserve connection.
We deserve to be heard.
Eight minutes isn’t too much to ask for.’

What happens when we reach out anyway:

🕑 Someone feels permission to be vulnerable
🕥 The weight of isolation lifts, even briefly
🕘 We discover that people often want to help, they just didn’t know we were struggling
🕟 Our hesitant part learns that reaching out can actually be safe

A gentle reminder: Your struggles matter.
The part of you that hesitates to reach out has been trying to protect you,
but maybe it’s ready to discover that you deserve those eight minutes of genuine care.

**Inspired by Simon Sinek and The Optimism Company’s 8-Minute Help Challenge

18/08/2025

‘When Our Internal Family Finds Its Strength’ 💪

Sometimes our parts have been working overtime because the external world hasn't felt safe. When we've experienced abuse, neglect, or ongoing harm, our internal system adapts, parts take on roles they were never meant to carry alone.

Protective parts might become hypervigilant, constantly scanning for danger. Young parts might go into hiding, carrying pain and fear in isolation. Manager parts might work exhaustingly hard to control every variable, believing safety depends entirely on their vigilance.

Here's what can shift in IFS therapy:

Parts that have been carrying the full weight of survival start to realise they're not alone anymore. The hypervigilant part discovers there's now an external ally (your therapist) helping to create safety. The parts that went into hiding begin to sense that someone trustworthy is standing guard.

When protective parts feel genuinely supported, not just told to ‘relax’ but actually experiencing sincere backup, something profound happens. They can start to ease their death grip on control. They begin to trust that Self can lead, knowing there's now a safety net.

This is when the real healing work becomes possible. When parts no longer have to spend all their energy on basic survival, they can turn their attention to processing, integrating, and reclaiming the fullness of who you are.

The shift can look like:

• Protective parts discovering they have an ally, not just another threat to manage
• Exiled parts sensing it might finally be safe enough to share their stories
• Self getting space to emerge and lead with the groundedness that comes from genuine safety
• The whole system learning what it feels like to not be carrying everything alone

This work takes time. Parts need to test whether this new support is real and lasting. But when they discover it is - when they feel truly backed up rather than abandoned to cope alone - that's when transformation becomes possible.

11/08/2025

The Part That Carries Hope 🌱

In our internal family, there’s often a part that holds something precious - HOPE.

This part might be quiet sometimes, especially when life feels heavy, but it’s there.
It’s the part that whispers ‘maybe tomorrow will be different’ when today feels impossible.

This hopeful part might show up as:

~The voice that says ‘let’s try one more time’
~The feeling that stirs when you see a sunrise or hear a favourite song
~The part that keeps you moving toward healing, even when progress feels slow
~The gentle nudge to reach out for support when you’re struggling

Sometimes other parts try to protect this hopeful part by hiding it away.
Our inner critics might say hope is naïve, or our wounded parts might fear that hoping leads to disappointment.
These protective responses make sense, hope can feel vulnerable.
But when we’re in Self we can appreciate both the wisdom of our protective parts AND the gift of our hopeful part.
We can honour the courage it takes to keep believing in possibility, even in the face of difficulty.

A gentle invitation: Take a moment to thank the part of you that carries hope.
What does this part want you to know today?
How might it want to be honoured or given more space?

Your hopeful part is not naïve, it’s wise.
It sees beyond what is, toward what could be.
And that vision is part of what keeps us moving toward healing and growth.

04/08/2025

Learning to Dance with Life’s Shifting Sand

Our parts really, really want guarantees.

They scan the horizon looking for solid ground, something they can count on staying the same.
Your Planning part wants to know exactly how things will unfold.
Your Security part is constantly checking
‘Are we safe?
Is this stable?
Can we trust this?’
And honestly? You can’t blame them.
They’ve been working so hard to create predictability in an unpredictable world.
But here’s what I’ve noticed:
When we’re always grasping for firm ground, we can miss out on the aliveness that comes from learning to flow with change.
Life is a bit like shifting sand, isn’t it?
The moment we think we’ve got it all figured out, something shifts.

What if, instead of fighting that reality, we could find a different kind of stability?
Self has this amazing capacity to be like a tree with deep roots, flexible enough to bend with the wind but grounded in something that doesn’t depend on external circumstances staying the same.
When Self is present, parts can feel that steady internal foundation even when everything around them is moving.
From that grounded place, we can start to lean into uncertainty with curiosity instead of fear.
We can ask,
‘What wants to emerge here?
What am I being invited to learn or become?’
Instead of just trying to survive the changes, we get to discover what it means to actually thrive within them.
Your parts might be hesitant at first. Change has probably felt scary before. But when they feel Self’s steady presence, they often discover they’re way more resilient and adaptable than they ever imagined. They start to trust that even if the ground is shifting, they’re not going to fall through the cracks.
What’s it like for you when you stop gripping so tightly to how things ‘should’ be?
Have you found that internal steadiness that lets you dance with life’s changes?
Ready to discover the unshakeable ground that lives within you?
Let’s explore what it means to thrive, not just survive 💙

28/07/2025

Your Internal Sanctuary

Did you know you carry a sanctuary with you everywhere you go? Not just as a nice metaphor, but as an actual inner space that belongs entirely to you.

In IFS, we talk about Self having this incredible ability to create what feels like a sacred internal space. A place where you can retreat, breathe, and just… be. It might look different for everyone. Maybe it’s a cosy log cabin in the middle of a forest, a sun drenched beach, or even just a feeling of vast, open sky. Some people experience it as warmth in their chest, others as a sense of coming home to themselves.

Here’s what’s beautiful about this sanctuary, your parts know about it too. When they’re feeling overwhelmed or scared or just exhausted from all their hard work, they can come here. It’s like having a safe room in your inner world where parts can rest without having to be ‘on’ or performing their usual jobs.

Picture your part that carries anxiety finally setting down that heavy bag of concerns it’s been carrying. Or the part that brings anger occasionally, getting to just… exhale, knowing it doesn’t have to fight right now. In the sanctuary, parts remember what it feels like to be held by something bigger and more peaceful than whatever crisis they’ve been managing.

And you? You get to be the loving host of this space. Self naturally knows how to welcome parts here with such tenderness. ‘Come and sit by the fire. You’ve been working so hard. What do you need right now?’

The amazing thing is, this sanctuary isn’t something you have to build or earn, it’s already there, waiting. Sometimes life gets so loud and chaotic that we forget it exists. But it’s always there, this quiet place of refuge within you, ready to offer rest and restoration whenever you remember to come home to yourself.

Have you discovered your internal sanctuary? What does it feel like when you and your parts find that sacrosanct space within?

Ready to explore the peaceful refuge that lives within you? I’d love to help you find your way home to yourself 💙

14/07/2025

The Magic of Being Truly Seen

One of the most beautiful things about IFS therapy isn’t just learning about your parts, it’s experiencing what happens when someone else gets to know them too.

Think about it: so many of our parts have been working in the shadows, trying to protect us or keep us safe, often without anyone really understanding why they do what they do.
Maybe you’ve got a part that’s always pushing for perfection, or one that withdraws when things get intense. These parts have their reasons, but they’re not usually the kind of thing you chat about in everyday company.

Then you walk into therapy, and something different happens.

Your therapist doesn’t just accept your parts, they genuinely care about them.

When your People Pleasing part shows up and starts apologising for ‘taking up too much time,’ your therapist might lean in with real warmth and say, ‘I’m noticing a part of you that’s worried about being a burden. I have such care for this part, what’s it been carrying?’

No judgment. No rushing to fix it. Just authentic love for all the ways you’ve learned to survive.

And here’s what’s incredible - when parts feel truly held by someone who genuinely cares, they often start to soften. That hypervigilant part that’s always scanning for danger? It might finally exhale a little when it realises there’s someone else who’s strong enough to hold watch. The part that’s convinced it has to handle everything alone? It gets to rest in the safety of a relationship where someone else is holding the container.

Your therapist becomes like a steady lighthouse, present, reliable, beaming care toward all your parts even when the storms of life are raging.
They hold space for your anger, grief, your fear, your shame, your joy. All of it. And in that holding, parts start to remember they don’t have to work so hard to be loveable.

This isn’t just about having someone listen to you talk about your problems. It’s about parts experiencing a relationship where they’re truly cherished, where they don’t have to be performative or hide or work so damn hard to be acceptable.

Your therapist’s Self is in relationship with your Self AND your parts, with deep, authentic care. They create a strong, safe container where even your most wounded or reactive parts can show up and be met with compassion. And when parts feel that kind of steady, loving presence, they often remember something they’d forgotten - that they’re worthy of care ‘exactly as they are.’

Have you experienced this kind of healing relationship? What was it like for your parts to be truly seen?
If you’re ready to explore what this kind of therapeutic relationship could offer you and your parts, I’d love to connect 💙

07/07/2025

Halfway Through the Year!

We’re halfway through the year now.
A time when many of us quietly take stock,
not in a big flashy way, but in small, reflective pauses.

What have I carried too long?
What no longer feels like mine to hold?
What parts of me are tired from pretending?

Sometimes the most healing thing we can do isn’t to ‘push forward,’
it’s to step back, even momentarily, and say:

That’s not my work to do anymore.
That’s not my story to fix.
That’s not my energy to spend.

It can be deeply uncomfortable to realise you no longer feel the same,
about a role,
a person,
a version of yourself.

But discomfort isn’t failure.
It’s often the doorway to freedom.

You’re allowed to have changed.
You’re allowed to say ‘no’ now,
even if you used to say yes.

You’re allowed to grow out of things that once appeared to fit you perfectly.

Therapy doesn’t hand out permission slips, it helps you write your own.
And I’m here if you’re ready to begin.

30/06/2025

🌿 What does a healing system feel like?

For some, it starts with a whisper, a quiet sense that something inside has been waiting. For others, it’s more of a jolt…. like tripping over a part of yourself you didn’t know was still alive.
IFS (Internal Family Systems) isn’t about ‘fixing’ you.
It’s about helping you find your way back to the home you carry within, the one that’s always been there, underneath the burdens, the beliefs, and the noise.

With their permission to feed back, Clients often describe moments of surprising tenderness:

‘I felt like I was meeting myself for the first time.’

‘I didn’t expect to like that part, but I did.’

‘It was like turning toward a child who thought I’d forgotten them.’

Healing isn’t always dramatic. Often, it’s quiet and fierce in equal measure.
It’s honouring the protectors, tending to the wounds, and learning to walk beside your Parts with clarity and care.

This is the work. Not to become someone new, but to return to the Self that was never truly lost.

If that idea speaks to something in you, a pull, a knowing, a nudge, you’re not alone.

You’re being invited back in. 🌿

Accanto Counselling

20/10/2025

13/10/2025

06/10/2025

29/09/2025

22/09/2025

18/08/2025

11/08/2025

04/08/2025

28/07/2025

14/07/2025

07/07/2025

30/06/2025

Address

Opening Hours

Website

Alerts

Shortcuts

Share

Category

Monday	9am - 5pm
Tuesday	9am - 5pm
Wednesday	9am - 5pm
Thursday	9am - 5pm
Friday	9am - 5pm