19/03/2026
I found out I had endometriosis just before I turned 30.
In the middle of COVID.
In isolation.
And not just endometriosisâŚ
adenomyosis and PCOS too.
It was one of those moments where everything finally made sense...
the symptoms, the pain, the things Iâd questioned for years.
But if Iâm honest⌠the overwhelming feeling wasnât relief.
It was fear.
Because my very first thought was:
âWill I be able to have children?â
At that point, I had no real education on these conditions.
No understanding of what it meant for my fertility.
Just a spiral of worst case scenarios, alone in lockdown.
We ended up going private after long delays with the GP,
and found the most incredible gynaecologist, someone who actually listened, explained, and gave us a plan.
We started with medicated cyclesâŚ
and when those didnât work, we moved to IVF/ICSI
IVF is a lot.
Physically, yes, but emotionally? Even more.
The waiting.
The hope.
The constant underlying fear of âwhat if this doesnât work?â
And thenâŚ
we got Anaya đ¤
Our first round. Our little miracle.
Now weâre here again, in a frozen embryo transfer (FET) sibling round
and itâs brought up so many of those same feelings.
Because even with success beforeâŚ
that fear doesnât completely go away.
What I donât think is talked about enough is the loneliness of all of this.
Even when you have support.
Even when youâre surrounded by people.
Thereâs a part of this journey that feels incredibly isolating.
If youâre in this space right now, a few things that have genuinely helped me:
⨠Let yourself feel both gratitude and fear can exist at the same time
⨠Stay away from Googling every symptom (I say this as someone who definitely did)
⨠Find one or two people you can be completely honest with
⨠Focus on what you can control e.g. nourishment, rest, support
⨠And remind yourself: your story isnât finished yet
Iâm sharing more of this side of my life because itâs real.
And because so many women are quietly going through it.
If thatâs you, I see you đ¤