MJB Counselling

20/02/2026

14/02/2026

Love can be a like a double edge sword for those that created the strong childhood belief of ‘I’m unlovable’, originating from the felt sense of feeling unlovable. This type of belief stems from parents/caregivers not being able to give love to the child in a healthy, secure and consistent way. When the baby’s needs to feel loved are not met, the baby starts to numb and cut off from the desire to connect. As holding onto the need for love and not receiving it is a very wounding experience. So, it becomes safer to freeze/cut off the desire to be loved, rather than risk feeling rejected and abandoned. This isn’t a conscious decision; it is a survival instinct. However, this coping strategy is very problematic as it creates barriers to letting healthy love in from those that are able to give healthy love.

But there is hope, as it is possible to rewire faulty negative beliefs, provide healing to release the fear of letting love in, and release feelings of hurt, rejection, abandonment and shame. When the adult self is able to start to let healthy love in and experience how nourishing this is. The adult self can start to repair and give their younger parts that are stuck in the past, a healing experience of compassion and love.

This is a rollercoaster journey of emotions. But boy is it a powerfully healing experience. You just have to commit to yourself and trust the process. Life can be more fulfilling and nourishing.

04/02/2026

These pairs often get confused because they can look identical from the outside - and sometimes even feel similar in the moment.

The key isn’t waiting to see how you feel after. It’s getting clear on what outcome you’re actually working toward.

⭐️Accountability vs. Shame: Do you want to learn from this mistake and do better next time? Or are you just beating yourself up on repeat? Accountability is future-focused. Shame keeps you stuck in the past.

⭐️Processing vs. Ruminating: Are you working through the emotion to reach understanding? Or are you replaying the same thoughts without resolution? Processing has movement. Ruminating is a closed loop.

⭐️ Boundaries vs. Walls: Do you want to protect yourself while staying open to connection? Or are you shutting people out completely? Boundaries are selective. Walls are total.

⭐️ Assertiveness vs. Aggression: Are you standing up for your needs while respecting the other person? Or are you bulldozing over them to get your way? Assertiveness honors both people. Aggression only honors one.

➡️ The distinguishing question: What am I trying to create here?

When you’re clear on the outcome you actually want - growth, resolution, safety with connection, mutual respect - it becomes easier to recognize which path gets you there.

02/02/2026

One of the greatest barriers to the acceptance of psychotherapies that stimulate acupuncture points by tapping on them, such as EFT and TFT, has been a persistent question: How does tapping on the skin lead to psychological change?

For decades, practitioners have known that therapies and self-help approaches involving tapping on acupuncture points are unusually fast and effective, but articulating a clear, science-based explanation has been more challenging. Over the past two decades, researchers such as Dawson Church, Peta Stapleton, and David Feinstein have steadily advanced the evidence base through peer-reviewed studies. In November 2025, David published a landmark synthesis of this research, offering the most coherent and comprehensive scientific account to date of the physiological and psychological mechanisms underlying EFT and TFT.

Recognising the importance of this work — and knowing that most practitioners don’t have time to read lengthy academic papers — Nick Ortner used AI to translate the research into a beautifully designed, 10-page illustrated infographic. David then reviewed the entire piece, making numerous corrections and refinements to ensure scientific accuracy.

It is perhaps the most engaging, accessible, and efficient way available to become conversant in the science behind tapping. The infographic can be easily viewed on a laptop or downloaded as a printable PDF. It also links to the original academic paper (bottom of page 1) and has an area at the end for posting questions. David will be checking in at least weekly as long as a discussion is going and happy to tackle any questions you present.

To see the infographic, click https://energytapping.com/how-tapping-works-infographic/

Feel free to share!!!

28/01/2026

As a holistic, trauma-focused psychotherapist, I help you heal old wounds through emotional regulation, nurturing mind, body, spirit, and heart.”

26/01/2026

'Your miracles are an inside job. Go there to create the magic you seek in your life.'

25/01/2026

My furry, four legged friend,
Is an angel without wings,
He comforts me with his presence,
And all the love he brings.

I'm sure he found his way to me,
When I needed a loyal friend,
And since then he's never left my side,
His devotion knows no end.

He's filled a gap within my heart,
And for that I am truly blessed,
Without words or dialogue,
He's laid all grief to rest.

I'm not sure who sent him to me,
But he feels like a gift from above,
Four soft paws, a wagging tail,
And a heart that's filled with love ..

🖋️C.E.Coombes "An Angel without wings"
🎨Makolina

Serendipity Corner 🐕

25/01/2026

Naturally, when people are hurt or betrayed anger comes up. Where there’s anger there is a natural human desire for “getting even” or getting justice of some kind.

One pattern I always noticed as a therapist is how many people would come to me with regret. Regret around what they said, or how they acted. Regret over how they carried themselves at their lowest. Regret that they didn’t get to actually express themselves how they wanted to in the flood of emotion they were feeling.

Emotional regulation is the most important skill set any human can practice and develop. Almost all of us struggle (myself included) because we weren’t modeled emotional regulation growing up. The ability to regulate your emotions doesn’t mean you don’t feel. It means you feel a lot, but your emotions don’t drive your behavior. When emotions drive your behavior, regret is the result.

The good part is, we can learn how to emotionally regulate at any age, and anytime.

Emotional regulation allows you to feel and pause. This will set you ahead of 90% of people. People who pause have an undeniable magnetic pull of confidence. Not because they’re special, but because they have emotional discipline.

They make conscious choices that their future self would be proud of, regardless of how they feel in the moment

22/01/2026

Small things like skipped meals, late replies, or constant over-scheduling are often overlooked.
In the rush of everyday life, it’s easy to get off track...
But when "getting off track" becomes your day-to-day, and neglecting your needs becomes routine, this might be signaling deeper issues.
Self-neglect isn't a conscious choice. It's usually a response to mental health challenges or emotional overload.
Our bodies and minds have been running on survival mode for too long.
We chalk it up to "life being busy," instead of realizing its signs we're struggling.

If this resonates with you, give yourself some grace.
And check in with your support network.
Remember prioritizing yourself isn’t selfish, it’s essential.

05/01/2026

There really is a special sensory experience being outside on a cold snowy day with the sun shining. I hope you feel this too.