Relationship OCD & OCD Support - Tracy Foster Counselling Services

Relationship OCD & OCD Support - Tracy Foster Counselling Services Counselling and cognitive behaviour therapy and hypnotherapy. Group therapy and workshops Counselling and cognitive behaviour therapy

The official publication date is fast approaching!12th June 2026 🎉Kobo, Books-A-Million and The Golden Notebook currentl...
29/05/2026

The official publication date is fast approaching!

12th June 2026 🎉

Kobo, Books-A-Million and The Golden Notebook currently have pre-orders LIVE ⏰

Waterstones, Amazon and Barnes & Noble are still processing but we still have a couple of weeks until the official publication date! 📆

Here is a bit of feedback from a client who recently ended with me ⤵"Previous therapy has always felt a bit sad, but wit...
28/05/2026

Here is a bit of feedback from a client who recently ended with me ⤵

"Previous therapy has always felt a bit sad, but with you, it feels like I'm talking to a friend.

You've given me a new lease of life.

Thank you"

It is always so rewarding when a client has learnt so much from our time together that they feel able to ‘go it alone’ on their onward journey in their ROCD recovery 💛

In my work with Relationship OCD (ROCD), people often assume the problem lies purely in the intrusive thoughts 🗯ROCD (a ...
27/05/2026

In my work with Relationship OCD (ROCD), people often assume the problem lies purely in the intrusive thoughts 🗯

ROCD (a subset of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) is often a lot more complex. One of these complexities is when small phrases create big doubts ⤵

Questions like: Do I really love my partner? What if they’re not the right person? What if I’m making a huge mistake? And while those thoughts certainly feel overwhelming, there’s something else I’ve come to notice repeatedly in sessions that plays a surprisingly powerful role: language 💛

Not the big relationship conversations about commitment or the future. I mean the tiny, everyday words and phrases that most of us use without a second thought. For someone with ROCD, those seemingly harmless phrases can land with far more impact than the person saying them ever intended. Sometimes they land like a court room verdict 👨🏻‍⚖️

The full article can be found here ⤵
https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/articles/relationship-ocd-and-the-power-of-words

Just some of the invisible battles that come hand in hand with ROCD ⤵➡ Exhaustion- not just tired, but exhausted. The co...
26/05/2026

Just some of the invisible battles that come hand in hand with ROCD ⤵

➡ Exhaustion- not just tired, but exhausted. The constant battles with your own mind, thoughts and trying to differentiate what is real and what is not.

➡ Isolation. Every time you hear the words “Oh I’m so OCD”, the feeling of total isolation grows- the confirmation that people don’t truly understand.

➡ Fear- Will this ever get better? Is recovery even possible?

➡ Internal battles- I don’t want to break up with my partner but something is telling me that I need to, right now.

➡ Distressing thoughts- that may come in the form of images, urges, memories etc

➡ Doubt- Do I really feel like this? Am I good enough? Are they good enough? Is there someone more suitable? Did I cheat on them and forget about it?

ROCD thrives on it’s ability to make you doubt every little thing whilst believing you need certainty right now.

Not every thought needs processing ❎Not every feeling needs explaining ❎Not every doubt needs documenting ❎Sometimes, th...
25/05/2026

Not every thought needs processing ❎

Not every feeling needs explaining ❎

Not every doubt needs documenting ❎

Sometimes, the healthiest thing you can do in OCD/ROCD recovery is ⤵

Close the journal 📖

Leave the thought unfinished ❎

Tolerate uncertainty ❓

Reconnect with life 🤝

Because healing is not found only in analysing yourself.

It is also found in ⤵

Laughing 😂

Resting 😴

Being present 🧘‍♀️

Connecting 🤝

Creating 🖼

Moving your body 💃🏽

Watching a film 🎥

Having dinner 🍽

Going outside 🌳

Living alongside uncertainty instead of endlessly solving it 🔎

A journal should be somewhere thoughts can land briefly, not somewhere they move in permanently.

And remember-
You are allowed to continue living your life even while your mind still wants answers 💛

So, how can journaling stay helpful in OCD/ROCD recovery? 🤔A few gentle shifts can make a big difference.Try moving away...
22/05/2026

So, how can journaling stay helpful in OCD/ROCD recovery? 🤔

A few gentle shifts can make a big difference.

Try moving away from ⤵
“What do I truly feel?”
or
“What does this mean?”

and towards ⤵
“What am I noticing right now?”
“How do I want to respond?”
“What matters to me beyond anxiety?”

Helpful journalling often includes ⤵

💛 Observing thoughts rather than solving them

💛 Naming emotions

💛 Recognising patterns

💛 Self-compassion

💛 Values-led actions

💛 Grounding back into life

It can also help to ⤵

Set a time limit (10–15 mins) ⏰

Avoid rereading constantly 🕵

Stop once the urge to “figure it out” appears ❎

End with uncertainty rather than conclusions 🔚

For example:
“I may not fully know this right now, and I do not need to solve it tonight.”

That is very different from forcing certainty.

Remember:
The goal is not to feel perfectly reassured ❎
The goal is learning to respond differently to uncertainty ✅

Monday’s final post on this topic is an important reminder for people who feel pressure to constantly process every thought.

A really important question in OCD/ROCD recovery is this⤵“Can I stop journaling or do I feel I NEED to finish?” ✍Sometim...
21/05/2026

A really important question in OCD/ROCD recovery is this⤵

“Can I stop journaling or do I feel I NEED to finish?” ✍

Sometimes journaling begins helping someone process emotions, but slowly becomes something they feel driven to complete properly.

You may notice ⤵

➡ Repeatedly returning to the same page

➡ Rewriting thoughts

➡ Needing to “fully explain” yourself

➡ Chasing the “right” wording

➡ Spending hours analysing

➡ Feeling unable to relax until you journal

➡ Reopening the journal after trying to stop

At this point, the journal may no longer be helping thoughts land.
It may be helping OCD stay active.

A journal should not become ⤵

❎ A courtroom

❎ A relationship autopsy

❎ A certainty machine

❎ An emotional monitoring system

Sometimes less is actually healthier.

Helpful journalling often has boundaries ⤵

✅ Limited time

✅ Limited revisiting

✅ Acceptance that uncertainty still exists

You are not trying to perfectly solve yourself on paper.

Tomorrow I’ll share ways to keep journaling supportive rather than compulsive 💛

One of the biggest signs that journalling may be shifting into OCD/ROCD territory is when it becomes less about expressi...
20/05/2026

One of the biggest signs that journalling may be shifting into OCD/ROCD territory is when it becomes less about expression and more about investigation 🕵️‍♂️

For example ⤵
💛 “Do I really love them?”
💛 “What did I feel in that moment exactly?”
💛 “Why did I react like that?”
💛 “What does this thought mean?”
💛 “What if I’m ignoring something important?”

The journal slowly becomes a detective board.

Many people begin recording ⤵
🔎 Feelings
🔎 Attraction levels
🔎 Doubts
🔎 Reactions
🔎 Emotional fluctuations
🔎 "Evidence”

hoping that eventually the answer will appear.

But OCD rarely says:
“Thank you, that’s enough information.”

Instead, it asks for more.
Helpful journalling tends to sound more like⤵

“I noticed anxiety increase when…”
rather than:
“This proves something about my relationship.”

Try to keep journaling observational rather than conclusive.
You do not always need to turn every feeling into a meaning.

Tomorrow I’ll talk about another important sign when journaling becomes difficult to stop ✍

Journalling can be incredibly helpful in OCD/ROCD recovery… but it can also quietly become part of the OCD cycle itself ...
19/05/2026

Journalling can be incredibly helpful in OCD/ROCD recovery… but it can also quietly become part of the OCD cycle itself 🔄

This is something I speak about often in therapy because many people start journaling with healthy intentions ⤵

➡ To process
➡ Understand patterns
➡ Express emotions
➡ Slow thoughts down

Over time, the journal can unintentionally shift into ⤵

➡ Analysing
➡ Checking feelings
➡ Solving uncertainty
➡ Replaying conversations
➡ Proving love
➡ Proving doubt
➡ Searching for certainty

The difficult part is that compulsive journaling often still looks “productive” or “self-aware.”

A helpful question to ask yourself is ⤵

“Am I exploring this… or am I trying to finish it?”

Because OCD/ROCD often wants closure, certainty and emotional resolution NOW.

✅ Helpful journaling creates awareness.
❎ Compulsive journaling usually creates urgency.

Over the next few posts, I’ll explain some signs that journaling may be becoming unhelpful and how to keep it supportive rather than anxiety-driven.

15/05/2026

The countdown is on; Together yet Apart is starting to filter onto online book stores for pre-order! 🤩

Kobo, Books-A-Million and The Golden Notebook currently have pre-orders LIVE ⏰

Waterstones, Amazon and Barnes & Noble are still processing but we still have just under one month until the official publication date! 📆

I truly cannot wait to share this with the world!

Tracy x

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