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Monday 10am - 6pm Tuesday 10am - 6pm Wednesday 10am - 6pm Friday 9:30am - 3pm

New Frame Therapy

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Saint Albans
New Frame Therapy

Virtual 1:1 Psychotherapy, Coaching and Couples Therapy with a focus on emotional wellbeing and relationships.
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16/01/2026

January has this pressure attached to it.

By now you’re supposed to be “back on it.”
Focused. Productive. When really you want to crawl back into bed and put the heated blanket on.

You’re capable and self-aware, but inside you’re still tired. Still orienting. Still coming out of last year’s mode of coping and getting through.

So you start negotiating with yourself.
Pushing when you’re already stretched.
Shaming yourself for not feeling ready yet.

Your nervous system doesn’t care about dates.
It cares about safety, rest, and whether life has slowed down enough for it to soften.

January is often less about momentum and more about regulation. About letting your system settle before you ask it to perform again.

Those 6am starts are going to hit differently, and that’s okay.

If your pace feels different right now, that’s information, not a flaw.

And if you’re carrying things quietly, like you always do, you don’t have to keep doing that alone.

I’m currently accepting new therapy clients.
Link in bio when you’re ready.

09/01/2026

We can talk about wanting deeper friendships.

Feeling more supported. Having our people around us when life gets heavy.

But when you zoom in on the day-to-day reality. Most of us are operating on connection autopilot.

Bare minimum effort. Maximum expectations.

Life is busy. Work is full-on. Brains are overstimulated. I get it.

But busy has become the easiest excuse for keeping everything surface-level.

We want people to show up for us in the ways we struggle to show up for them.

“Call me if you need anything” feels safe because it keeps real intimacy at arm’s length.

It sounds supportive but it asks nothing of us.
It’s connection without commitment.

But deeper relationships don’t grow in that space.
They grow in the small, intentional acts of showing up.

Checking in before someone hits breaking point.
Making time even when it’s inconvenient.
Being willing to be seen, not just useful.

We get stuck in surface level connections because of patterns built from childhood roles.
Attachment wounds. Emotional burnout.
Patterns that made being hyper-independent feel safer than relying on anyone.

And that’s exactly why doing the work in therapy matters.

If that’s something you’re ready to explore, my diary is open.

29/12/2025

A quick clarification before defensiveness kicks in.

When I name misogyny and patriarchy in relationships, I’m talking about systemic conditioning.

Not character flaws. Not individual intent.

These patterns can exist in relationships where no one is “the bad guy.”
They’re learned, reinforced, and often invisible.

If this feels uncomfortable, that doesn’t mean it’s an accusation.
It usually means it’s touching something deeper.

24/12/2025

Sometimes Christmas with the family reminds you exactly why you need therapy

16/12/2025

My post about transactional relationships hit a nerve. (See the pinned post on my page for context)

I think so many women are finally saying out loud what they’ve felt for years — that emotional safety isn’t optional.

In couples therapy, I saw patterns that went far beyond “communication issues.”
Some sessions involved toxic control, coercion, and even physical abuse.
And while trauma can explain behaviour, it never excuses it.

As therapists, we’re taught to hold empathy for everyone.
But empathy doesn’t mean abandoning our boundaries.
We are not obligated to keep working with clients who cause harm or refuse accountability.

And the same truth applies outside the therapy room.

You can understand where someone’s pain comes from without accepting the way they treat you.

Because healing requires both compassion and limits.

If you’re looking for therapy in St Albans or online, I have a few spaces open.
Link in bio 🤍

02/12/2025

It’s true.

As therapists we have to sit with the complexities of relationships and that might not always position the people closest to you in the best light.

It’s not always appropriate to say when someone sounds like a 🍆 (sometimes it is).

But, the reality is life and relationships are complex and as a therapist we also have to bracket our own assumptions and biases.

And people think all we do is listen.
Ha!
If only it were that easy.

📸 credit

26/11/2025

The child who was already responsible and didn’t make mistakes becomes the woman with high-functioning anxiety and perfectionism paralysis.

When you grow up being the “mature one,” the helper, or the child who kept things together, your nervous system learns that safety comes from being in control.

You stop allowing yourself to be messy, uncertain, or human because mistakes used to come with consequences.

So as an adult, you might appear confident and capable… while underneath, you’re constantly scanning for what could go wrong.

You overthink decisions.

You freeze when something isn’t perfect.

You can’t rest, because rest feels unsafe.

It’s hard to get started on things because you’re already overthinking all of the ways it could go wrong.

Do you relate?

📣Work with me 1:1 for relatable trauma informed therapy 💞 Link in bio

Lizandra x

🎙️Not ready for therapy? Listen to the podcast Healing Childhood Trauma available all places you listen to podcasts

24/11/2025

An intro to me,
Hey I’m Lizandra and I’m a psychotherapist.
I’m pretty straight talking. A like a lil bit of woo but I couldn’t tell you when mercury is in retrograde.
I’m aware it means a lot to some, me not so much.
I’m a deep thinker, I run head first into the hard conversations and my BS detector is pretty sharp.
I think the environment I grew up with in London probably helped with that. Plus the sprinkling of trauma (because who hasn’t lived through tough experiences).

I’m a good mix of sensitive and will tell you about yourself - but I’ll probably cry and feel bad about it after.

That all reflects what I post here and the work that I do with my clients.

I don’t have the biggest account - I put the majority of my energy into my client work, so I do what I can here and on my podcast Healing Childhood Trauma (go check that out).

Hope you enjoy and learn from what I post here.

P.S. Posts here are not a replacement for therapy.

👇🏾If you’re feeling chatty, ask me something in the comments or tell me about you

20/11/2025

Women aren’t born afraid of their own anger. We’re taught to be.

Be quiet. Be pleasant. Don’t make a scene.
And if you do speak up. There’s always a label waiting.

That conditioning doesn’t disappear in adulthood.

It turns into people-pleasing. Overthinking. Shrinking yourself.

Suppressing your anger is not harmless.

It sits in your body. It chips away at your sense of self. It keeps your nervous system on high alert until burnout feels like your normal.

But it’s why you never feel rested, no matter how much sleep you get.
Your brain always in thinking mode - it never seems to switch off.

It’s why you’re always feeling irritated. Holding onto resentment.

If you’ve spent years being the “good girl” at the expense of your own wellbeing. You are not overreacting. You’re recognising the cost.

If you’re tired of carrying this and you want to stop second-guessing yourself. Get clearer in your decisions and feel like yourself again. This is the work we do in therapy.

Link in bio or send me a DM if you’re thinking of starting therapy.

Lizandra x

18/11/2025

I have a lot respect for men. The ones who are imperfect, kind, loving sons, committed fathers, getting it wrong at times, but trying to figure it out.

But the ones who put hands on women. The ones who dehumanise women.
The ones who invalidate, dismiss and manipulate.

It’s a no from me. Therapist or not - I don’t f*x with that.

That’s a big reason why I stopped working with couples. I can’t in good conscience support a relationship that does more harm than good.

This therapist was tired of the misogyny and patriarchy.

Address

Victoria Street
Saint Albans
AL1

Opening Hours

Monday	10am - 6pm
Tuesday	10am - 6pm
Wednesday	10am - 6pm
Friday	9:30am - 3pm

Telephone

+447934764469

Website

http://newframetherapy.co.uk/, https://linktr.ee/Newframetherapy

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