New Frame Therapy

20/11/2025

Women aren’t born afraid of their own anger. We’re taught to be.

Be quiet. Be pleasant. Don’t make a scene.
And if you do speak up. There’s always a label waiting.

That conditioning doesn’t disappear in adulthood.

It turns into people-pleasing. Overthinking. Shrinking yourself.

Suppressing your anger is not harmless.

It sits in your body. It chips away at your sense of self. It keeps your nervous system on high alert until burnout feels like your normal.

But it’s why you never feel rested, no matter how much sleep you get.
Your brain always in thinking mode - it never seems to switch off.

It’s why you’re always feeling irritated. Holding onto resentment.

If you’ve spent years being the “good girl” at the expense of your own wellbeing. You are not overreacting. You’re recognising the cost.

If you’re tired of carrying this and you want to stop second-guessing yourself. Get clearer in your decisions and feel like yourself again. This is the work we do in therapy.

Link in bio or send me a DM if you’re thinking of starting therapy.

Lizandra x

18/11/2025

I have a lot respect for men. The ones who are imperfect, kind, loving sons, committed fathers, getting it wrong at times, but trying to figure it out.

But the ones who put hands on women. The ones who dehumanise women.
The ones who invalidate, dismiss and manipulate.

It’s a no from me. Therapist or not - I don’t f*x with that.

That’s a big reason why I stopped working with couples. I can’t in good conscience support a relationship that does more harm than good.

This therapist was tired of the misogyny and patriarchy.

14/11/2025

As therapists we can’t shy away from saying the hard things and having the hard conversations.
We are not only here to validate because sometimes some behaviours are problematic. Therapy is not all light and only saying what you want to hear.
It’s also what you need to hear. Even when it’s hard and uncomfortable.
That’s an important part of healing, growth and changing unhealthy patterns ❤️‍🩹

I have a few spaces free right now if you’re feeling called to start therapy.

Send me a DM and let’s see if we’re a good fit to work together.

Lizandra x

11/11/2025

Childhood trauma patterns get replayed in relationships but not everyone is showing up and doing the work to resolve these issues.
That’s exactly what I see my therapy practice every single week

What do you think? Do you think more men need to go to therapy?

07/11/2025

This is why I stopped working with couples as a Therapist.
Relationships were getting embarrassing as a whole.
I’m glad we’re finally talking about it.

03/11/2025

People with secure attachment are not perfect!
But there are some things they do that help them to reconnect with themselves and others.

That’s usually because it’s been modelled to them enough in childhood to be able to put that in practice.

Some of us have to learn it ourselves, even as adults.

Ready to learn more on how to regulate your nervous system and have secure attachment?

Grab your free guide The Ultimate Guide to Secure Relationships.
Link is in bio.

💭Have you been thinking about therapy? See my links about working with me

Lizandra x

30/10/2025

The child who was already responsible and didn’t make mistakes becomes the woman with high-functioning anxiety and perfectionism paralysis.

When you grow up being the “mature one,” the helper, or the child who kept things together, your nervous system learns that safety comes from being in control.

You stop allowing yourself to be messy, uncertain, or human because mistakes used to come with consequences.

So as an adult, you might appear confident and capable… while underneath, you’re constantly scanning for what could go wrong.

You overthink decisions.
You freeze when something isn’t perfect.
You can’t rest, because rest feels unsafe.
It’s hard to get started on things because you’re already overthinking all of the ways it could go wrong.

Do you relate?

Work with me 1:1 for relatable trauma informed therapy 💞 Link in bio

28/10/2025

Having an an anxious attachment style or avoidant attachment isn’t as different as you think.

We can demonise an avoidant attachment style because it looks like they don’t care - but there’s more happening in your nervous system.

And it’s not that different to anxious attachment.

Learn more on Healing Childhood Trauma streaming now wherever you listen to podcasts.

👉🏾I’m accepting 1:1 therapy clients right now, so it’s a good time to get in touch.

26/10/2025

You learned to be the adult long before you ever got to be a child.

When that’s been your reality, not being responsible can feel unsafe.
You might find yourself fixing, caretaking, or holding space for everyone — even when you’re exhausted.

Healing asks you to slowly put it down.
To let someone show up for you.
To trust that you’re allowed to just be, without holding everything together.

🌱I have 3 spots that have opened up for therapy to start in November. You can book an intro call to see of we’re a good fit to work together.
Or DM me the word THERAPY and I’ll send over some info.

Lizandra x

P.S. If you’re not quite ready for therapy, you can listen to my podcast Healing Childhood Trauma - available in all the usual places you find podcasts.

22/10/2025

Attachment healing is largely relational. We heal attachment through relationships with ourselves and others.

It’s also through relationships that offer consistency, models healthy boundaries and empowers you to find your own strength, instead of looking to someone outside of you to fix it or make it all better.

Secure attachment is developed when you are given the space to trust your own judgement and knowing that that even when you make mistakes, you can be challenged, while also being supported.

This consistency and attunement is often the relational experience that has been missing in the past.

To download your attachment healing guide for better relationships with yourself and others, visit the link in my bio.

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21/10/2025

Your trauma isn’t healed by avoiding your feelings and buying something to temporarily feel better for a short-lived dopamine hit

21/10/2025