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Monday 10am - 7pm Sunday 10am - 7pm

https://www.fantasticday.coach/

Fantastic Day Therapy, 48 West Elloe Avenue, Spalding (2025)

10/09/2025

Life changes. It’s all about how you cope that matters.

In 2019, I ran my fifth Berlin Marathon. Well, I say ran, it was a slog and a half as you can see!

I worked out that if I ran every Berlin marathon for the next five years, I’d qualify as one of their “Jubilee” runners, and get a special green teeshirt, my own personal runners number, and guaranteed entry into every Berlin marathon after that. And I’d run my 10th Berlin marathon when I was 50! The numbers appealed to me.

Yes, five years of continual training, paying a fortune to enter, always going to the same place… for a green teeshirt and the opportunity to keep doing it.

It seemed like a good deal at the time.

But then Covid happened and the 2020 marathon was cancelled. And in 2021 travel and Covid still seemed scary. And then I hit perimenopause and got sick and long distance running became something my body no longer let me do.

For years marathon running had been a huge part of who I was. Outside of my work, I was someone who ran. Not well, not elegantly, and often not with a great deal of enjoyment… but I did it.

And then I couldn’t. My green teeshirt dream slipped out of reach, and rather than feeling happy or relieved, I felt confused and upset and annoyed and lost. I kept trying and failing to run, arguing with myself that I could, o realising I couldn’t, and then trying again because surely if I wanted it enough I could do it.

The emotional anguish every time my body said no at about six to eight miles was heartbreaking. I would sit and endlessly go over pacing charts, looking for ways that I could get round the newly imposed cut off times.

It was impossible. The only way to preserve my health and sanity was to stop - but I couldn’t.

In the end, I sought out therapy and did some metaphorical elicitation work. It helped me see that even if I was to manage it, it didn’t actually get me anything that mattered to me any more. And that really, I just needed to grow up.

It hurt - but it finally allowed me to break free. In three weeks, the marathon runs again… and I’m okay with not being there. I’m at peace with the changes that life has brought my way. And that’s a wonderful feeling.

Metaphorical elicitation is a technique i now use to help my clients see their issues for what they really are. It’s brilliant for helping you break free from being stuck.

Book your free intro chat by visiting my site or dropping me a message here on Facebook today.

02/09/2025

The other day I was playing around with Google's latest AI generator - and by feeding it a photo of me (standing up!) and a photo of a scene from one of my favourite TV shows, it was able to generate a picture of me in one of the scenes.

It's a bit of fun, but AI is making it difficult to tell what's real from what's fake. What's been carefully coded and crafted fro what's actually real.

Of course - some of us are already there, living in a world of terrifying imaginary scenarios, where random strangers could be muggers (or worse), long established employers suddenly go bankrupt, children get abducted on their way to the shops and normal every day activities look like something out of one of the Final Destination movies.

It's not a very fun place to be, really, not nearly as much fun as letting the computer photoshop a slightly skinner you into a scene from a TV show.

When it comes to this type of anxiety, you really only have two choices. Stay there forever... or choose to do something about it.

I know that you might have tried regular approaches already, and it's not helped much - for all the "regulating your nervous system" that box breathing might do, it doesn't stop the pictures in your head. And journaling how you're secretly terrified of going on the annual family holiday just means you get to remind yourself the next time you go to write something down.

That's why my approach is different. It's not for everyone - as my reviews will show you! But for those who it suits, it can be life changing.

Find out more on my website or drop me a message today!

30/08/2025

September has always felt like the real new year to me.

Not January with its hangover and empty promises but September, with its back-to-school energy and the sense that summer's permission to drift is officially over.

I've been thinking about all the things I said I'd start "when the time was right." When I felt ready. When I was thinner, more confident, less busy, more organized. When my anxiety was under control. When I had my life figured out.

But I've been waiting for a version of myself that doesn't exist.

The woman who wakes up one day completely fearless, perfectly prepared, with all her ducks in a neat little row. The one who never doubts herself, never feels overwhelmed, never lies awake at 3am wondering if she's making the right choices.

She'd be wonderful... but she's not going to turn up... that perfectly ready version of me is a myth I created to avoid the messy, scary, uncertain business of actually living.

September doesn't care if you're ready. It arrives anyway, with its crisp mornings and fresh possibilities, asking the same quiet question it asks every year, "What are you waiting for?"

Maybe the sign you've been looking for isn't a bolt of lightning or a moment of perfect clarity.

Maybe it's just a calendar page turning, reminding you that time keeps moving whether you're participating in your life or just watching it happen.

Maybe "ready" isn't a feeling you wait for. Maybe it's a choice you make.

What would you start today if you stopped waiting to feel ready first?

And if anxiety is the thing keeping you stuck in the waiting room of your own life, I get it. I work with smart women who've tried all the 'simple' solutions and found their anxiety is anything but simple.

Sometimes the courage to start isn't something you find - it's something you build.

Find out more about how I can help you - and book your free consultation - through my website today.

27/08/2025

Is what’s behind you holding you back?
Are you being led by your past?
Move forward more easily and maybe even break free with the unconventional therapy I offer here at Fantastic Day in Spalding.

Book your free chat via my website or drop me a message through messenger today… and let’s get you going where *you* want to go!

27/08/2025

Wednesday. Halfway through another delightful week with your colleagues.

Gotta love them, right (mostly because anything else would get you in trouble!)?

So yes, colleagues. Those charming humans you're legally required to spend eight hours a day with. The ones who "reply all" to emails that needed one response, steal your lunch from the fridge, and somehow manage to take credit for your ideas while simultaneously explaining why they won't work.

And out of all of them, there's always one who is the worst, isn't there?
The office psychopath who treats every meeting like a gladiator arena.
The passive-aggressive one who signs emails "As discussed" when nothing was discussed.
The one who thinks "urgent" means "I've just remembered this exists."

And what do you do?
You smile. You nod. You tell yourself it's not that bad while quietly planning their demise in seventeen different ways.

Sadly, I've got to tell you some bad news now... they're not going anywhere.
Karen from Accounts isn't suddenly going to develop self-awareness.
Dave from Marketing isn't going to stop interrupting you mid-sentence to share his "better" ideas.

But you know what can change? How much headspace you give them.

You can't fix other people's personalities - trust me, if we could, I'd be out of a job.

But you can absolutely stop letting them live rent-free in your brain, replaying conversations at 3am and practicing comebacks you'll never use.

I help people deal with the psychological carnage of working with absolute weapons. Because life's too short to let Dave from Marketing ruin your sleep.

Your choice: keep letting them drive you mental, or learn how to not give a toss what they think.

Gimme a call on 07912 682 412 or visit my website to book your free consultation today.

25/08/2025

A new week... how anxious are you feeling today?

If the answer is, "really quite anxious, actually, Vic!", then let's have a little talk about your anxiety, shall we?

You know, that charming little companion that's been living rent-free in your head for the past... what is it now, five years? Ten? Longer?

Here's a fun fact for you - anxiety doesn't improve with age.
Like a fine wine, you might say, except the opposite. It gets worse. Much worse. There's a load of neurological, psychological reasons for it, but just trust me on this or now.

You can keep thinking it'll just sort itself out that... that one day you'll wake up and your brain will have magically repaired itself overnight, like some sort of neurological fairy godmother has popped round with a toolkit.

Bad news folks - she hasn't. And she won't.

Your anxiety is basically a toddler having a tantrum. And what happens when you ignore a toddler having a tantrum? Do they calm down and start behaving rationally?

No. They get louder.

So while you're there pretending everything's fine, downloading meditation apps you'll never use, and telling people you're "managing it," your anxiety is in the background doing push-ups and planning its next big performance.

The good news? I can help you deal with it properly.
The bad news? You actually have to do something about it.

Your choice is:
Keep feeding your anxiety for another decade, or book a consultation and sort it out.

Either way, it's going to be an interesting ride!

24/08/2025

I've been selling some clothes on Vinted lately.

You know, that oddly satisfying process of photographing your wardrobe mistakes and sending them off to strangers who might actually love them (once we've had an hour's back and forth about 50p, anyway)

And every time I list something, I have to choose XXL as the size, despite it being a a size 16. Urgh. Dear Vinted... just under half the women in Britain are not some sort of enormous anomaly - we're just normal human beings.

And we wonder why we're all screwed up about our bodies.

Speaking of which, I've stopped offering weight loss hypnosis.

Not because I've lost faith in helping people, but because those weight loss injection pens are genuinely better than any hypnosis session I could ever provide. Yes, the prices have gotten a bit scary lately, but if you're healthy enough to take them, they work.

But here's the thing you need to remember - the injections deal with the appetite, not the reason you needed to eat your feelings in the first place.

If you gained weight because you broke your leg and couldn't exercise, or because night shifts wrecked your metabolism, then brilliant - problem solved!

But if you got here through comfort eating, mindless snacking, and those 3am rendezvous with Domino's because your day was unbearable?

The injections aren't going to fix why you needed food to cope with life.

Most of us don't get fat because we don't understand nutrition. We get fat because we don't know how to deal with our emotions without involving chocolate.

And when you stop taking those injections, if you haven't figured out what food was actually doing for you, you'll be right back where you started.

That's exactly what I help with - unravelling the emotional patterns that got you here in the first place.

If you're ready to tackle the real reasons behind your relationship with food, book a free consultation through my website. Because the real work isn't about what you put in your mouth - it's about what's going on in your head.

23/08/2025

Saturday morning.

Coffee in hand, scrolling through social media, watching everyone else's highlight reel.

Couple selfies from last night's dinner. Anniversary posts. "My person" captions with heart emojis.

And there you are, wondering when you became the friend who always gets the single seat at restaurants.

So you're thinking about dating again.

After ten, fifteen, maybe twenty years of marriage that ended in either divorce papers or a funeral program, you're suddenly supposed to put yourself "out there" like some sort of romantic warrior.

Except "out there" now involves apps with names like Bumble and Hinge, and apparently people send pictures of their ge****ls as conversation starters. The dating landscape has changed so dramatically, you feel like an archaeologist trying to navigate a space station.

Your friends are being helpful, obviously. "You need to get back out there!" they chirp, as if dating were like riding a bicycle instead of walking naked through a minefield while juggling flaming torches.

And your brain? Your brain is having an absolute field day with this one.

What if nobody finds you attractive? What if you've forgotten how to flirt? What if your body doesn't look like it did when you were thirty? What if you say something stupid? What if they're secretly a serial killer?

The alternative seems simpler, doesn't it? Just accept that romantic love is behind you now. Become a nun. Get seventeen more cats. Embrace your destiny as the neighborhood eccentric who everyone secretly thinks is probably fine but definitely weird.

But here's the thing: you didn't survive everything you've survived just to spend the rest of your life hiding from possibility. You didn't learn who you are, what you want, and what you absolutely won't tolerate again just to keep that wisdom locked away.

Yes, dating at forty plus is terrifying.

Yes, it's different now. Yes, some people are awful and some experiences will be disasters.

But some won't be. And you deserve to find that out.

If anxiety is keeping you stuck between wanting connection and being too scared to try, that's exactly what I help with. Because courage isn't the absence of fear - it's deciding you're braver than your brain thinks you are.

22/08/2025

I'm seeing more and more people who are terrified of doctors and hospitals.

Which is strange, isn't it? You'd think that watching the NHS pull off miracles during COVID - keeping people alive against impossible odds, working themselves into the ground for strangers - would make us trust healthcare more, not less.

But instead, I'm hearing the same stories over and over:
"They don't understand."
"I don't want to go back."
"They don't care."
"I don't want another phone appointment."
"They were mean."
"They made me feel stupid."

And here's the thing - I'm not going to sit here and tell you that all doctors are lovely, misunderstood angels who just want to help. Goodness knows I've had my own horrific experiences with GPs right here in Spalding.

Some healthcare professionals are brilliant. Others... well, let's just say bedside manner wasn't their strongest subject at medical school (yes, I'm having a polite day).

But here's what I will say - your fear of seeking help is now bigger than whatever you originally needed help for.

And that's a problem.

Because avoiding doctors doesn't make health problems disappear.
It just makes them scarier and more complicated.

As a therapist, it's not my job to convince you that all healthcare professionals are wonderful. But it is my job to help you find the inner strength to deal with the "what ifs" that are keeping you away from the care you need.

To help you make your own decisions, ask the right questions, and be your own advocate - even when your brain is convinced that walking into a surgery is basically volunteering for torture.

You deserve healthcare. You deserve to be heard.
And you deserve to feel strong enough to fight for both of those things.

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is book that appointment anyway.

Call me on 07912 682 412 or visit my website if you need my help.

20/08/2025

Tomorrow is GCSE results day.

And right now, parents across the country are having a collective nervous breakdown while pretending everything’s fine.

You’re lying awake wondering if you’ve ruined your child’s entire future because you didn’t hire that maths tutor in Year 9. You’re mentally rehearsing your “it’s not the end of the world” speech while secretly believing it might actually be exactly that.

And your kids? They’re catastrophizing in HD, convinced that anything less than perfection means they’ll end up living under a bridge somewhere.

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: these results matter. They do. Anyone telling you they don’t is lying to make you feel better.

But they don’t matter as much as everyone’s pretending they do.

Your child is not going to spontaneously combust if they get a C instead of a B. Their entire life trajectory is not determined by whether they can remember quadratic equations under pressure.

And you, parent-who’s-been-stress-eating-since-June, you didn’t fail because your teenager couldn’t be bothered to revise properly. Sometimes children make their own choices, regardless of how brilliantly you’ve parented them.

Tomorrow will bring what it brings. Some of you will celebrate. Others will need to figure out Plan B. Both are completely normal.

If you or your child are struggling with the anxiety, disappointment, or pressure that comes with any of this, that’s what I’m here for. I use unconventional approaches - provocative therapy, IEMT, and metaphorical work - to help people find their resilience and move forward.

Because sometimes the real lesson isn’t in the grades. It’s in learning that you can survive your worst-case scenarios.

19/08/2025

Let's talk about your anxiety, shall we?

You know, that delightful little voice in your head that's convinced you're about to die every time you have to make a phone call. The one that's turned grocery shopping into an extreme sport and made small talk feel like defusing a bomb.

Here's what nobody tells you: your anxiety isn't actually trying to ruin your life. It's just spectacularly bad at its job.

Think of it as having a security guard who thinks a butterfly is a terrorist threat. Well-meaning, but utterly useless at distinguishing between actual danger and "oh look, someone wants to chat at the school gates."

Your brain is running on outdated software, treating modern life like you're still dodging saber-toothed tigers. Except the tigers are now things like "replying to that text message" and "deciding what to have for lunch."

The good news? Unlike your relatives' opinions about your life choices, anxiety is actually fixable.

I work with smart women who've discovered that their anxiety laughs in the face of breathing exercises and finds meditation apps about as useful as a chocolate teapot. Women whose brains are too sophisticated for simple solutions and too stubborn for positive thinking.

If you're tired of being held hostage by your own nervous system, let's chat. Because life's too short to spend it convinced that everything's about to go catastrophically wrong.

Spoiler alert: it probably isn't.

17/08/2025

My mother hated having her photo taken.

"I look awful in photos," she'd say, the moment a camera appeared. Every single time, like a reflex she couldn't control.

My dad had no such concerns. If confidence were a sport, he'd have gone professional. So family photos became this lopsided thing - me, my brother, and dad grinning at the camera while mum retreated behind it, directing us to "smile nicely!" from the safety of the shadows.

On the rare occasions we managed to coax her in front of the lens, she'd purse her lips into a tight line. She hated her smile, her teeth, the way her eyes crinkled. As she got older, she became convinced that any expression at all would reveal wrinkles she was desperately trying to hide.

There are entire years of my childhood where there's no photographic evidence she existed. Holiday photo albums with mysterious gaps. Birthday parties where she's cropped out of her own life.

And here's the thing that breaks my heart now: her fear became mine.

I learned to flinch when cameras came out, to automatically say "I look terrible" before anyone else could. Not because I actually thought I looked awful, but because that's what women in my family did. That's how we responded to our own reflection - with immediate, reflexive self-criticism.

We think this is about photography, don't we? About learning better angles or finding good lighting. But it's not. It's about the stories we tell ourselves about our worth, and how those stories get handed down like family heirlooms nobody wants.

The real tragedy isn't the missing photos. It's that my mother genuinely believed she was too ugly to deserve to be remembered. And she taught me to believe the same thing about myself. She didn't mean to... but she did.

This is what low self-esteem actually looks like - not dramatic breakdowns, but quiet erasure. The gradual disappearance from your own life because you've convinced yourself you don't deserve to take up space in it.

If you find yourself saying "I look awful in photos," ask yourself where did you learn that? And more importantly, what are you teaching the people who love you about their own worth?

Some things are too important to pass down.

Fantastic Day Therapy

10/09/2025

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30/08/2025

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25/08/2025

24/08/2025

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