Nik Bisbey Therapy & Coaching

04/01/2026

Dum Spiro, Spero — While I breathe, I hope.

Emerging into a new year, I discovered this beautiful Latin phrase and it’s really stuck with me.
For many, 2025 was a challenging year, demanding endurance, adjustment, and a quiet resilience that is difficult to acknowledge.

Beginning with this phrase, with breath and honesty, feels like a respectful and appropriate place to start 2026.

Hope, for me, refers to an idea; a direction. It shapes how we move with our lives and how we meet what’s in front of us. And as long as there is breath, there is still choice. They’re sometimes small subtle choices, sometimes slow to evolve, but always present and real.

From this place of presence, breath, and hope, goals tend to emerge more quietly. They’re informed by what supports you now, by where your energy naturally gathers, and by what no longer needs to be held so tightly. Direction often arrives through listening and gentle consideration rather than striving.

Dum Spiro, Spero is naturally grounding. Breath is constant, even when motivation fluctuates, stress overwhelms, or clarity feels distant.
You don’t need a complete map at the start of the year, a sense of orientation is often enough to take the next step.

As the year opens, my hope for you is simple: that your goals grow from self-respect and acknowledgement of where you’ve been; that your direction feels coherent in your body as well as your mind; and that hope stays close as a steady companion, especially when the path bends and you can’t see what’s ahead.

While we breathe, we hope. And from there, we get to choose what comes next.

If this reflection connects for you, you’re very welcome to reach out. I’m holding space this January for gentle, reflective work with clients who need support finding their direction and to develop clarity and momentum for the year ahead.

Nik

My thoughts and hope extend to our neighbour who tragically lost his young family this Christmas.

24/12/2025

Wisdom comes in many forms.
Tim Minchin shares timeless wisdom with a comedic spin.
And he’s not wrong!

23/12/2025

Sleep quality is a primary focus in Solution Focused Hypnotherapy. If you’re not sleeping well, everything is harder!
We help you to get back into a comfortable cycle.

16/12/2025

Phew!
6.5 hours of a training seminar plus a test run by someone with ADHD about ADHD is the equivalent of 13 hours of a neurotypical presentation!
I usually have to speed up a prerecorded seminar to be able to focus (they’re usually too slow to keep my attention) but this Legend went at double speed on her own!

Only another 30 hours and module tests to go with this training program.

12/12/2025

Professor Steve Peters succinctly normalises being emotional, moving on from regret and judgement, and having the right professional support to recover from your past.
Wonderful man and author of the enormously influential book The Chimp Paradox

07/12/2025

Do you think about regulating your nervous system?
I check in with my nervous system regularly and adapt the demands on myself, my nutrition, activity and rest balance accordingly.
This is something that’s not commonplace in our language and thoughts, but we must change this if we are to continue to be effective and healthy for the longer term.

29/11/2025

18/11/2025

People Pleasers, Narcissists, And Empaths.

If we didn’t have people pleasers and empaths, where would the narcissists go? Would they turn on each other? (Movies like Wolf of Wall Street come to mind. They join forces until it all goes sour!)

I’ve just come away from a training in spotting narcissistic behaviours and supporting empaths with recovery from narcissistic abuse.

Typically, a narcissist will target an empath. Often the empath is well liked, accomplished, and kind.

The narcissist will look to derail their victim to elevate their own status and feed off the control that they exert. They will aim to dominate and discredit the empath, who is often a people pleaser too, and is trying to keep the peace and appease the narcissist.
A narcissist will often be quite public about their criticisms of the empath in an attempt to gain greater control and isolate the empath, thus reducing their resources and ability to make sense of the situation or fight back.

Often, my clients who are victims of narcissistic abuse, are looking to escape or recover from a domestic situation that has floored them.

I haven’t been looking at the narcissists at work. But there they are, in plain sight, claiming credit for your work, gaslighting, undermining, and subtly bullying.

Fundamentally, we can’t assume to be able to change a narcissist, but we can rebuild the confidence, clarity, and self-esteem of a victim. We can help the empath or people-pleaser to recover their voice and sense of self, and we can undo the effects of (often years of) gaslighting.

I have worked with a few narcissists too. Perhaps that’s for another post when I’m feeling a bit bolder! They don’t often seek therapy. They rarely believe there is anything wrong in their behaviour and certainly don’t like being called out! It can help if a narcissist seeks therapy, but first they have to acknowledge that they might have a problem.

It’s not an easy subject to discuss if you’ve been a victim of narcissistic abuse either at work or at home, but knowing that there is help available, people who understand, and specific tools to help you to recover, can ease the burden and shine a light on your future.

14/11/2025

Don’t feel bad if the cold plunge is not for you. It’s not right for everyone!

11/11/2025

Watch this. It might just change your perspective on your day

27/10/2025

I was sitting at my desk after a client session with a young adult overwhelmed by the pressures of life.

Then, ping! Julien’s motivational email lands in my inbox. Normally I’d smile, but this time, it made me pause.
Because I realised I never actually read them anymore.
Julien’s great. His messages are full of wisdom.
But they’ve become noise.
And I think that’s what so many of us, and our young people are battling.
A constant flood of information, opinions, expectations, and advice.

All well-intended. All too much.

Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do for your mind is to hit unsubscribe.

Not because you don’t care but because you need space to breathe, focus, and simply be.
And the same is needed for our young people. Not all digital information is bad. Not all social media is damaging. Screen-time can be great. We have a responsibility to ourselves and our young folk, to learn to filter, to show them what it means to moderate. To recognise overwhelm, and reduce the 'noise'.

🧠 Focus is self-care.
💬 Filtering is strength.
💔 Reducing noise is healing.

With thanks to for the inspiration 😉