22/10/2025
The urgency is I've neglected myself too long done things not the right way and making everything and everyone an emergency but me,
Now I'm like f**k this what am I gonna do wait til I'm in the grave before I change my lifestyle a bit,
I don't have any worthwhile woman I've met that's on it or will nag me to live longer only short sighted people,
so it's up to me ,
im on my own so hence my complete enthusiasm for self care ,
i wanna live longer enough to make golden memories with sincere people,
I want to sell my house and do an eco project that learning difficulty kids can come and enjoy nature ,
I want to do normal couple stuff with real ppl not bu****it ppl or crazies,
Again my own fault but that was my cycle to break,
I want to give more word on behalf of the Father the Great Spirit,
I want to carry on sword practice,
I want to have a meaningful impact on my niece and nephew when they all move this end ,
I wanna live to experience that of which I've not known so much,
I desire to complete my soul journey,
I'm smoking but I smoke damiana tea leafs instead of to***co and v**e my elven leaf now,
I want to try my hardest to love ppl more but with wisdom not impulse to care,
And also I promised the multiverse and the great spirit that as we are all one,
Let us journey this earthly adventure together with me,
From the bottom feeders to the top ,
Archons to the Father and all that's in-between,
There's lots of little check points I want to complete for me,
I gave my all to Eastern martial arts and achieved all my check points on my martial adventure,
Have to give my all to myself for a bit and do things that make me happy,
Enjoy all the free stuff that God made ,
The trees nature woods beach the moors ,
The climate ,
To only mate with someone who has the right energy and not just cause you think you look nice to each other,
Although some people do pretend their the right energy,
I'm 53 I ain't got forever left for nonsense,
How I look at a woman has changed how I protect my spirit and soul has changed,
My desires were the same just I was stupid enough to think that older ppl are more true and know what they want ,
I was wrong to give such benefit of doubt and hope ,
Just be still and don't let the world take little pieces out of you ,
Care for self, love self , love life, love worthy people ♥️