12/08/2025
Direct Cremation, Grief, and the Role of Celebrants… Let’s Talk
I have been having some really important conversations lately with families who have experienced a direct cremation for a loved one.
While a direct cremation can be the right choice for many reasons, I have noticed a pattern, when there is no ceremony at the time of the cremation, families often don’t realise that they can still have a memorial, celebration of life, or gathering afterwards or before anywhere they choose.
It doesn’t have to be at the crematorium.
It could be in your garden, on a beach, in a park, in your local pub, wherever feels right for honouring that person’s life.
For some people that I have spoken to, the absence of a funeral service has made it hard to know where their grief “starts.” A funeral, whether formal or informal, often acts as a marker in time, a point where family and friends come together, share memories, cry, laugh, and start to process what’s happened. Without that moment, grief can feel unanchored, and in some cases, it can intensify feelings of loss or affect mental health.
One thing that seems to surprise people is that you do not have to arrange this through your funeral director.
As independent celebrants we can work with families directly to create a meaningful event whenever they feel ready, weeks or even months after the cremation.
I think as celebrants, we have an opportunity to gently educate the public about this, and perhaps work alongside funeral directors to make sure families know their options.
I would love to hear from fellow celebrants and funeral directors.
• Do you talk to families about holding a separate memorial after a direct cremation?
• Have you found ways to help them understand that this can happen anywhere, at any time, with or without a funeral director?
• How can we, as a profession, make this knowledge more widely available?
Let us start the conversation, because everyone deserves the chance to say goodbye in a way that feels right for them.
Mx
