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Changing Relations

We are an arts education and training company that provokes thinking around gender equality, gender

12/12/2025

here

Today I'm wanting to send trans-solidarity vibes into the world.

In preparing a pilot CPD for the educator partners involved in our current project in which we'll explore the way in which domestic abuse is gendered, I was sifting through statistics to build a picture of who is victimised and to what degree.

It's really sobering.

SafeLives data indicates that up to 80% of trans people experience abusive behaviour from a partner or ex partner.

Crown Prosecution Service has collated data showing that:

💔 62-73% of transgender people have experienced harassment / violence because they identified as trans

💔 80% are fearful of a range of public situations with half avoiding public toilets

💔 91% of transgender boys and 66% of transgender girls have experienced harassment at school leading to depression and social isolation

What really stood out to me in the SafeLives data was that both trans men and trans women were more likely to have a male than a female abuser, with 81% of those behaving abusively male.

Why did this stand out?

With all of the public toilet furor that blasts in and out of the news with unpleasant regularity, the implication is that trans people are to be feared.

Don't get me wrong, as someone who has spent 12 years working with the theme of domestic abuse, I get that women who have been victimised by men often want women-only spaces to support their psychological safety.

But why on earth are we tarnishing a group who are amongst the most victimised of all with the fear brush?

It would be so lovely if we could move away from this rancorous age of intolerance to one in which we focus on empathy and equality for all.

The image I'm sharing with this post was amongst the artwork our Student Social Action Group commissioned as part of our Let's Talk About S*x project, displaying a trans man getting to know himself post op. It was really important to the group to be LGBTQIA+ inclusive in thinking about s*x and relationships, including the relationships we have with ourselves.

Thanks for the beautiful image (https://mernywernz.com/ABOUT-1).

Peace out people!

10/12/2025

16 days - day 16

Today marks the final day of the 16 days of activism against gender-based violence. It is also International Human Rights Day.

Over the past 16 days, we have explored:

⚠️ a range of different manifestations of digital abuse, from nonconsensual intimate image sharing to social media surveillance and using mobile communication to control your partner's movements and access to support

⚠️ various aspects of s*xual and relationship behaviour that might be harmful and make someone uncomfortable

⚠️ the range of ways we can when we see anything from harmful s*xist jokes to unwanted s*xual behaviours

⚠️ the impact of speaking up - or not - when someone is experiencing abuse or harassment, including the seemingly "small" behaviours that nevertheless make receipients feel uncomfortable

⚠️ a range of contexts in which we can Speak Up, from the workplace, to the street, to public transport, the classroom and school corridors

Let's create a culture where women and girls feel safe and confident. It's our right!

If you think we could help you in your context with a workshop based around any of the themes we have addressed over the last 16 days, get in touch - info@changingrelations.co.uk

Image credit

White Ribbon UK
UN Women

North East Combined Authority

09/12/2025

16 days - day 15

Today we've chosen to feature photos from rehearsals for our new film A is for Amy.

These images show Amy being supported by friend Frankie, then college tutor Vanessa after Frankie has expressed concerns about Amy in an email.

We wanted to share this from the perspective as it's useful to be aware of the range of different ways young people can support friends they are worried about.

In the story, Amy becomes increasingly isolated from her friends due to her boyfriend's jealousy & control. She sometimes finds herself locked in the flat & sometimes is so down she can't face going to college, even though she was the star student on her course.

Thankfully she has lush friends (this wasn't an accident!!! - we wanted to create a pro-social model of young people accessing help) who realise that barely ever seeing her - & her increasingly erratic college attendance - could be signs everything isn't as rosy as her social media account portrays.

We see Frankie agonise over messaging Vanessa. He doesn't want to betray Amy & is worried she will be cross. But he is worried about her wellbeing.

What was important for us to show is that there are adults young people can talk to, who can make referrals to specialist support.

This is because when we were planning the project, we came across data showing that 25% of 13-17 year old girls experience intimate partner abuse whilst support service referrals are lower than the proportion affected, meaning that young people in toxic relationships are going under the radar.

In some situations, this indirect approach to might be the safer option. Frankie was concerned that Amy's boyfriend Dean was monitoring her phone, so if he raised his worries directly with her, he risked putting her in danger if Dean became angry she had allowed someone to see what was going on.

We can't wait to share the film with you - hopefully for a screening in the new year - watch this space!

Image credit

Photos feature

08/12/2025

16 days - day 14

In working with young people on the theme of being an , we felt it was important to highlight a range of different options for .

So, as well as actively calling out someone's behaviour, or reporting behaviour we think is unacceptable, we also explored options such as supporting the victim. In our Weaving Stories animation, a group of young people all went to visit the Wellbeing Officer together to provide moral support to those who had tricky experiences to share.

The image we're sharing today is a throwback to a previous project themed around young people's s*xual attitudes and behaviours, where the lovely artist was commissioned by our Student Social Action Group to create a series of images reinforcing positive relationship behaviours such as effective communication, self-care and kindness towards others.

The key illustration she created is a prompt to think about safety and the need for bystander intervention.

We have talked in a range of posts about the public behaviours that affect women's perceptions of safety. It's entirely normal in conversations with other women to talk about the discomfort of walking alone in the dark and to reference clutching onto your keys as a tool to use in self-defence in case of an attack.

Obviously this shouldn't be normal. Women and girls should be able to move freely without fear of harassment or violence.

But as it is the case, it's worth considering what we can do to support a woman or girl we see being made to feel uncomfortable in public. Can we stand by them or walk with them to discourage the unwanted attention?

There are lots of different ways we can

White Ribbon UK
UN Women

North East Combined Authority

07/12/2025

16 days - day 13

Today we pivot from non-contact forms of abuse such as s*xting or social media surveillance to feature the classroom scene from Weaving Stories which includes an example of unwanted s*xual touching.

Olivia tries to catch the teacher's attention but is drowned out by the louder contribution to class discussion of the boy who is touching her leg under the table, leaving her visibly upset.

But what the young people made sure to include within the story, is an example of one of the lads speaking up, calling out his mate for the clearly unwanted s*xual behaviour.

He says "I saw what you did to Olivia" in a heated exchange.

When we work with young people, we make sure to highlight that, in considering whether to when we see harmful behaviour happening in front of us, we have to make sure to consider whether it is safe for us to do so. But it is powerful to see examples of young people being prepared to stand up and call each other out.

It is sobering to note in Ofsted's Review of S*xual Abuse in Schools that in the year prior to publication (2021), girls aged between 15 and 17 reported the highest annual rates of s*xual abuse for young people and children aged 25 and younger.

64% of the girls Ofsted surveyed reported that unwanted touching happened 'a lot' or 'sometimes.'

Let's empower young people to normalise speaking out instead of feeling like they have to suck it up!

Image credit

UN Women

North East Combined Authority

06/12/2025

16 days - day 12

Today we're focused on a different form of digital abuse, as featured in Amy's story within our Sometimes it Hurts story series.

As this story was the starting point for our toxic teen relationship-themed play A is for Amy, this behaviour also features within our soon to be released film!!!

Here we see the phone used as a tool for control, with Amy's boyfriend Dean constantly checking up on her whereabouts and whether or not she is doing things he approves of. This results in her social circle - and therefore the potential for support - significantly reducing as he is jealous and suspicious of her meeting up with her friends and family.

Within the play script this further develops into surveillance of her social media, expressing anger at any posts in which she has used make up with an accusation that she must be trying to attract other lads.

Mobile phones and social media are so normalised for young people these days, these behaviours can not register as controlling and abusive.

This makes it really important to give young people an opportunity to recognise that these kinds of behaviours are red flags of digital abuse and they do not have to tolerate them.

We're so excited to be trialling both Sometimes it Hurts and A is for Amy in a range of North East schools and youth groups after Christmas.

If you'd be interested to hear when this content becomes more widely available, sign up to our mailing list - info@changingrelations.co.uk

For now, you can access Amy's story Pay As You Feel via the fab website designed for us by -

https://sometimesithurts.org.uk/story/amys-story/

Image credit

UN Women
North East Combined Authority

05/12/2025

16 days - day 11

Somewhat depressingly, the digital abuse referenced yesterday in relation to Ofsted's findings in 2021 is not a new phenomenon.

Back in 2013, the Children's Commissioner produced a report about "How young people in England understand consent", in which it was found that the 'widespread' practice of s*xting is overwhelmingly a result of young men pestering young women for intimate photographs of themselves, with young men gaining 'man points' amongst their male peers for collecting, and being able to show off, these images.

In the same year, the Girls' Attitudes Survey found that "the majority of girls and young women experience gender-based harassment" of which having their personal images circulated without consent is one form.

More than a decade of digital abuse. Surely it's time to

When Changing Relations first started out, 12 years ago, we worked with young people from .school to coproduce a short film to challenge young people's risk-taking behaviour. They chose to focus on the incidence of s*xting and scripted a scenario similar to our most recent depiction, in Weaving Stories, of Tannah's intimate images being shared around the school, followed by widespread s*xist name-calling and victim-blaming bullying, with very few young people seeming to appreciate at first how much this kind of behaviour could impact their peers.

It was brilliant to see the young people we worked with, over a decade later, at , so keen to normalise the calling out of harmful behaviour, with a focus on highlighting impact and engendering empathy amongst their peers.

If you'd be interested in getting your hands on our original s*xting-themed educator toolkit, which comes together with the youth coproduced short film, get in touch - info@changingrelations.co.uk

Image credit

White Ribbon UK
UN Women
North East Combined Authority

04/12/2025

16 days - day 10

Another set of stills from our Weaving Stories animation shifts us back to the UN Women theme of digital abuse.

In producing their 2021 Review of S*xual Abuse in Schools, Ofsted visited 32 schools & spoke to 900+ young people about the prevalence of peer s*xual harassment & violence.

Girls indicated that the following non-contact forms of harmful s*xual behaviour happened online or on social media ‘a lot’ or ‘sometimes’ between people their age:

📱 being sent pictures or videos they did not want to see (88%)
📱 being put under pressure to provide s*xual images of themselves (80%)
📱 having pictures or videos that they sent being shared more widely without their knowledge or consent (73%)
📱 being photographed or videoed without their knowledge or consent (59%)
📱 having pictures or videos of themselves that they did not know about being circulated (51%)

This is digital abuse.

Not only is it commonplace, young people reported that ‘slag’ & ‘slut’ were commonly used & this is what is depicted in the images below.

Intimate images of Tannah are circulated around the school & she has a distressing walk through the corridors being called names, with a strong dose of victim-blaming evident in the peer response.

Let us be clear it is not the fault of the person whose images are shared!

a) they may have been pressured into sharing these images

b) choosing to share an image with a boyfriend or girlfriend is not the same as consenting to that image being shared onwards with others

In the animation we see Matilda , calling out her peers for this digital abuse & trying to capture the teachers' attention to support Tannah.

The young people who coproduced the story & characters were keen to normalise speaking up & challenging harmful behaviour amongst their peers.

If you'd like us to run a lesson on this theme for your students, get in touch - info@changingrelations.co.uk

Image credit

White Ribbon UK
North East Combined Authority

03/12/2025

16 days - day 9

Continuing on with the theme of s*xual harassment...

Working with young people on our recent Weaving Stories project, it was evident that public transport was a real challenge point for them, with girls reporting frequently being stared at by adult men in ways that made them feel uncomfortable.

The first point to note about this is that the boys couldn't believe this was a regular thing that happened. In response, the girls were absolutely definitive that this was something that happened to them very regularly.

The second point to note possibly relates to why the boys weren't aware of this. It was evident from talking to our young people (and this very much tallies with the findings of the report we referenced yesterday relating to public s*xual harassment and the reasons women don't report) that there are lots of thing that happen that they see as too "normal" or too "small" to say anything about.

Yet they were very clear that these things made them feel uncomfortable.

In our animation, the image of the man staring at Matilda progressively becomes more monster-like to indicate her increasing discomfort and possibly also fear - will he get off at the same stop as her - what will happen then - is she safe?

From the point of view of 's call for us to there are a few steps we need to put into play -

1. We need to acknowledge that things that seem small might have a bigger impact than we imagine on women and girls' perceptions of their own safety

2. We need to start noticing those "small" day-to-day behaviours - it's not ok to claim ignorance - the information regarding the prevalence of this is out there

3. If it is safe for us to do so, we could and challenge the intrusive behaviour we notice

Let's make public transport a place where women and girls do not feel uncomfortable and anxious!

Image credit

UN Women
North East Combined Authority

02/12/2025

16 days - day 8

Continuing with the White Ribbon UK theme of Speaking Up, this image commissioned by students from Durham University The Northern School Of Art Bishop Auckland College as part of our Let's Talk About S*x project, responds to findings -

📢 71% of women in the UK have experienced s*xual harassment in a public space – this number rises to 86% among 18-24-year-olds

📢 Over 95% of all women did not report their experiences of s*xual harassment

📢 44% of women agreed that having more confidence in the consequences of reporting would encourage them to report

📢 Of those who did not report because they thought doing so would be too dangerous or emotionally upsetting, 76% said they would be more likely to report if they had confidence that doing so would prevent the incident from happening again

📢 Of those women who reported being threatened, coerced or forced into participating in s*xual behaviour, or being touched s*xually without consent, 47% said they would be more likely to report if there was less stigma of being seen as a victim

Take a look at the report here -https://www.unwomenuk.org/site/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/APPG-UN-Women_S*xual-Harassment-Report_2021.pdf

What can we take from this?

There is a proliferation of behaviour in the public domain that is making women feel unsafe, diminished and they are afraid to Speak Up about it.

If this is in the public domain, it means it is something someone else might notice.

What if we normalised Speaking Up, calling it out, standing in solidarity with women, reducing their fear of what might follow, reducing their sense of not being taken seriously or validated as survivors of unwanted s*xual behaviours?

It's brilliant that the Shine scheme is encouraging employers to ensure employees and contractors are protected from s*xual harassment on or off the premises.

But this is also a cultural phenomenon. It is on all of us to .

Image credit

UN Women

01/12/2025

16 days - day 7

Bit of a pivot today in our focus on the White Ribbon UK Speak Up imperative.

The campaign articulates the need for us to call out s*xist jokes. This is a theme that featured in an animation we were commissioned to create by the Principal of college which you can watch on our You Tube channel -

https://youtu.be/OX6wdt4wtEo

You might think - so what? It's just banter.

But it's worth stopping to consider what some of this "bants" reinforces. If we make jokes about who wears the trousers in a relationship, the implication is that a relationship is a dynamic that is inevitably built on control.

Again you might think, so what, people get that it's just a joke.

Are you sure?

Is it not possible that there are people listening who take this as a green light for controlling their partner, under the impression that none of their peers would question them "wearing the trousers"?

Obviously no one wants to be the banter police! But it's also important to recognise that we are social creatures - we exist in groups, in society, and our ideas are shaped by the messages all around us.

!

Original zine designed by
Animation credit@animatorsheryl
With sound by .mp3

UN Women

North East Combined Authority

30/11/2025

16 days - day 6

Little shout out today to the North East Combined Authority who, under the leadership of our fab Mayor Kim McGuinness, have launched Shine North East - an accreditation scheme aimed at recognising employers who lead with fairness, opportunity and respect.

The very first stage of the scheme requires employers to evidence that they have:

✨ The functions in place to support employee’s positive mental health (e.g., de-stigmatising, open culture, identifying risks, early prevention).

✨ Training for managers to spot the signs and respond.

✨ Plans or policies in place that support common triggers of mental health decline, including awareness of domestic abuse and provision of information sources for employees.

✨ Risk assessment processes ensuring employees and contractors are safe, including procedures for raising the alarm.

✨ Policies or actions to ensure employees and contractors are protected from s*xual harassment on or off the premises.

It is really brilliant to see this commitment to supporting employees and we're really chuffed that a recording of our Demystifying Domestic Abuse webinar has been uploaded to the Shine website as an employer resource in recognition of the 16 days of activism.

Take a look - https://shine.northeast-ca.gov.uk/

White Ribbon UK
UN Women

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What We Do

Changing Relations C.I.C. is an arts-based education and training company that challenges thinking around gender norms, gender equality and healthy relationships, using creative methods to provide original educational and training resources.

We work with artists, communities and experts to produce powerful content in a range of art forms to engage audiences and participants; from film, music, theatre and dance to creative writing and visual arts.

We address topical and sensitive subjects, such as domestic abuse, male mental health and s*xting risks, in an accessible way, giving a voice to those people who have been affected and generating public and professional understanding.