16/12/2025
Shame often shows up in the way we speak to others and to ourselves.
When we apologise for our needs, boundaries, or emotions, we reinforce the belief that they are somehow wrong or “too much”. In CBT, we explore how thoughts, feelings, and behaviours influence one another. Shame based thoughts, such as “I am a burden”, can lead to apologetic behaviours that deepen feelings of unworthiness.
One powerful shift is moving from shame to gratitude.
Instead of framing your needs as a problem, you acknowledge the support around you. This helps reduce self criticism while strengthening connection and appreciation in relationships.
Here is what that shift can look like:
🔹 “I am sorry I cannot do more” becomes “Thank you for understanding, I am at capacity.”
🔹 “I am sorry I am slow” becomes “Thank you for being patient.”
🔹 “I am sorry for being a burden” becomes “Thank you for being supportive.”
🔹 “I am sorry I got so emotional” becomes “Thank you for giving me a safe space to talk.”
Over time, this reframing helps retrain the brain and build new patterns that support healthier self talk and more balanced relationships.
👉🏻👉🏻👉🏻Weekend CBT Appointments in Reading for Ages 13 and Up.
Book your appointment here:
https://oxford-talking-therapies.selectandbook.com/
