Aligned Mindset- Psychotherapist Counsellor & CBT Hypnotherapist

29/10/2025

Love starting the day with gratitude 🌿

I just received a new Google review and it genuinely made my heart swell.

The greatest reward is seeing my work bring ease, hope, and steadiness in someone’s life.

Thank you to every client who trusts me with their healing- you are the reason I do this work.

If you’re ready for gentle, evidence-based support, my door’s open. You don’t have to do it alone.

🗓 Book via the link in bio / website
�📩 Questions? Pop me a message

16/09/2025

Anxiety isn’t just feeling nervous. It’s your body’s alarm system… stuck on high alert.Your brain thinks you’re in danger—even when you’re safe. That’s why your heart races, your chest feels tight, and your thoughts won’t switch off.If you’re feeling anxious right now let’s do a quick check in now - let’s ground ourselves together.

16/09/2025

I often hear from parents who are worried about the pressures facing young people. Whether it’s social media, school demands, or worries about the climate, pre-teens and teenagers are carrying a lot. The good news is that with the right support, young people can learn tools that help them not just cope, but thrive.

Why early support matters
Mental health challenges often begin in childhood or the teenage years. Getting help early can ease distress now and prevent bigger struggles later on. Early intervention isn’t about “labelling” a child. It’s about listening, understanding, and building healthy coping skills that last a lifetime.
Please read the full article here

I often hear from parents who are worried about the pressures facing young people. Whether it’s social media, school demands, or worries about the climate, pre-teens and teenagers are carrying a lot. The good news is that with the right support, young people can learn tools that help them not just...

04/09/2025

A Quick Self-Check on control

�Not all control is harmful — but sometimes it’s tricky to tell the difference.

Here’s a simple way to pause and reflect

✅ Good control helps you feel safe, steady, and clear. It supports your growth and strengthens your relationships.

Examples
- managing your time,
- sticking to healthy routines, or
- expressing your needs clearly.

❌ Bad control drains you, increases tension, and often damages trust. It can leave you feeling isolated, anxious, or frustrated with others.

Examples
- micromanaging,
- obsessing over outcomes, or
- holding on to things outside your influence.

Remember: control itself isn’t the problem — it’s how we use it.

🌱 By asking yourself these questions, you can notice when you’re slipping into unhealthy control and gently redirect yourself toward healthier habits.

💡 Reflection: Next time you notice yourself feeling tense, ask: “Am I trying to control something that isn’t mine to hold?”

03/09/2025

The Trap of Bad Control

�❌ Bad control often sneaks in when we try to micromanage people, outcomes, or even emotions that aren’t truly ours to hold. At first, it can feel protective — as if controlling every detail will create safety or certainty. But in reality, it usually does the opposite.

Instead of safety, bad control creates tension, anxiety, and disconnection. It keeps us on high alert, scanning for things we can’t actually manage, which leaves us exhausted and frustrated. The belief that “If I let go, everything will fall apart” can feel convincing — but it’s a trap.

When we hold too tightly, we leave little space for trust, growth, and flexibility. Bad control blocks us from experiencing the calm that comes from accepting what’s within our power — and what isn’t.

🌱 The shift comes when we practice good control: setting boundaries, caring for ourselves, and focusing on what’s truly ours to influence. Releasing the rest isn’t weakness — it’s freedom.

💡 Reflection:- Where in your life are you holding on too tightly?

What might happen if you allowed yourself to soften your grip?

03/09/2025

✨ Good control is about creating a sense of stability and empowerment in our lives—not through rigid rules or force, but by choosing where we place our focus and energy. It means setting boundaries that protect our wellbeing, making choices that align with our values, and directing our attention toward the things we can influence rather than getting lost in what we cannot.

When practiced well, good control doesn’t restrict us—it frees us. It gives us clarity, structure, and safety without becoming rigid or overwhelming. Instead of feeling like we’re constantly battling life, we can navigate challenges with more balance and confidence.

💡 A simple reflection: “Is my control helping me grow, or keeping me stuck?” If the answer leans toward growth, then it’s likely healthy. If it feels heavy, suffocating, or fear-driven, then it may be slipping into unhealthy control.

🔑 Good control feels grounding. It helps us regulate our emotions, honour our limits, and cultivate self-trust. It allows us to respond rather than react, to choose with intention rather than from fear.

Healthy control is a tool for growth—supporting resilience, healing, and the ability to live more authentically.

02/09/2025

Wait, Negative Emotions Can Be Good?

Yes! The key is how we respond to them.

💭 Concern helps us take action, while Anxiety can trap us in avoidance.
💭 Sadness allows us to heal, while Depression can keep us stuck.
💭 Remorse repairs relationships, while Guilt punishes the self.
💭 Healthy anger asserts our needs, while Unhealthy anger turns aggressive.

Negative emotions aren’t enemies — they’re signals. Learning the healthy side of each helps us grow, connect, and move forward.

30/08/2025

Why Letting Go Feels So Hard

�If “just relax” were that easy, you’d have done it by now.
�Letting go of control can feel like

�🚨 Danger�
💔 Betrayal�
😰 Powerlessness

�So when you find yourself clenching, planning, correcting…�Pause.

�Ask:�
✨ “What is this part of me trying to protect?”�
✨ “What would feel safe enough right now?”

�Control doesn’t need to disappear.

�It just needs a little compassion. 💞

�

29/08/2025

Control Can Feel Like Connection (But It’s Not)

�Sometimes we think we’re “connecting,”

�…but we’re actually controlling

�✔️ Oversharing too fast�
✔️ Needing reassurance over and over�
✔️ Steering the conversation away from vulnerability�
✔️ Fixing others instead of feeling our own stuff

�These are clever strategies to feel close - without feeling exposed.

�Real connection feels uncertain.
�That’s what makes it real. 💗

�

29/08/2025

Control Can Disguise Avoidance

�Control isn’t always obvious.
�Sometimes it hides in subtle ways, like

�• Changing the subject
�• Making jokes to steer things away�
• Saying “I’m fine” when you’re not
�• Needing all the answers before moving forward

It may look like resistance, but underneath it’s usually fear — fear of being exposed, hurt, or overwhelmed.

Avoidance is just a clever protector.
�But healing asks us to pause, notice, and gently stay with what’s here… even if it feels uncomfortable. 💭

�

28/08/2025

Perfectionism = Polite Control

�Perfectionism isn’t just about “doing things right.”

�It’s often about controlling how others see us.

�“If I’m perfect, I won’t be rejected.”

�“If I do everything right, I’ll be safe.”

�But perfectionism shrinks our lives.
�It silences our needs.
�It costs us rest, connection, and joy.

�You don’t have to be flawless to be worthy. 🕊️

�

28/08/2025

When Control Feels Safer Than Trust

�Sometimes we try to control everything because trusting feels too risky-

�We over-plan.

We overthink.

We micromanage.

�Not because we’re “bossy,” but because we’ve been hurt before.

�Control becomes a shield.

�But here’s the thing:
�What kept you safe then… may keep you stuck now. 💭

�Letting go of control isn’t weakness — it’s courage in motion.

�