Alexandra Butler Psychotherapy Services

17/02/2026

🌙 Neurodiversity & Sleep – Online Event 🌙

We’re pleased to invite Surrey parent and carers to an online workshop on Wednesday 4th March at 7:00pm, focused on neurodiversity and sleep.

Sleep can be much harder for neurodivergent children and young people — for reasons completely beyond their control. There are biological differences that affect sleep, and it’s important to know that you are not doing anything wrong, and your child is not doing this on purpose 💛

You may have tried lots of advice before, but many ‘typical’ sleep strategies are based on outdated information and often don’t work for neurodivergent children.

Join Family Voice Surrey and Nickie Sutton, Specialist Sleep Practitioner, for a practical and reassuring session exploring:
✔️ How neurodiversity affects sleep
✔️ Why traditional sleep advice often doesn’t help
✔️ What does help — with realistic, supportive strategies (and no taking away screens!)

✨ What’s included:
📹 Access to a recording after the session
📄 A comprehensive information pack to take away

This session is designed to be supportive, understanding, and empowering — whether sleep challenges are new or ongoing in your family.

👉 Don't miss out. Book your place here: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1982675390465?aff=oddtdtcreator

We hope you can join us 💙

17/01/2026

Navigating the Maze is a set of pre-recorded workshops for parents of children who have needs that may be associated with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

These six workshops help to support parents in understanding neurodevelopmental needs and how to respond to them. Each workshop explores a different topic from:
•Different presentations of neurodivergence
•The developing brain
•Independence skills and strategies
•The importance of play

These workshops are available to watch on the Mindworks website and you can access and revisit them at any time.

To find out more, visit: https://www.mindworks-surrey.org/advice-information-and-resources/neurodevelopmental-needs/navigating-maze-toolkit-strategies-parents-neurodivergent-children

13/01/2026

Hi, Happy New Year!
I have had a couple of sessions become available, contact me if you would like a free consultation to see if it would be helpful for us to work together.

16/10/2025

https://emea01.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.psychologytoday.com%2Fprofile%2F1211893&data=05%7C02%7C%7Cc79adeb4bb434e6020e808de0c8d0080%7C84df9e7fe9f640afb435aaaaaaaaaaaa%7C1%7C0%7C638961996921115038%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&sdata=BkSW43DThj7GcAO0rDny1qiaodJljd7R1GrZunAg5lk%3D&reserved=0

Alexandra Butler, Psychotherapist, Walton-on-Thames, KT12, 01932 501601, Hello. As a highly experienced therapist with 20 years’ experience of working with children, adolescents, and families, I appreciate the challenges life can bring. I am a qualified systemic family psychotherapist and drama th...

16/01/2025

An increasing number of children are struggling to attend school. The conventional approach prioritises a rapid return to their setting. For some children, this simply doesn’t work. They are stuck, not attending school but not learning out of school either. What happens then - and what can we do about it?

This illustrated guide lifts the lid on the experiences of children and families who are struggling within the school system and explores how we can work with these young people to maximise their chances of a positive and fulfilled life.

The book encourages professionals to take a new perspective and to consider what can be done differently. It explores the ways in which difficulties with school are understood by children, parents, and professionals, and shows how things can go wrong (and right), using real-life examples from a range of settings. Chapters delve into common interventions and the impact these can have in practice, before introducing alternative approaches which have the child at the centre. The voices of young people are foregrounded throughout, shedding light on their struggles with attendance - including when placements have completely broken down – and, importantly, showing how they have gone onto success. Original illustrations are included to bring these ideas to life.

Placing authentic experiences at the core, this book offers a valuable insight into the lives of children and families when school has gone wrong and will leave you with new ideas as to how to turn things around. What Can We Do When School’s Not Working? is essential reading for professionals working with children who are struggling with school attendance, from SENCOs and educational support workers to educational psychologists, senior leadership teams, and local authorities.

I was so pleased to work on this book with Dr Naomi Fisher and Abigail Fisher.

Available to pre order from all good bookstores now.

“A complete departure from most of what is available in this subject area. I love it.”Dr Lisa Cherry FRSA Trauma Informed Consultancy Services Ltd

16/01/2025

Do you want to understand more about teenage burnout? Are you concerned that your teen might be burnt out or heading in that direction? Come to my talk for Liberated Learners on Jan 28th. Timed for the US as well as UK time zones.

It's pay-what-you-can. I'll explain the process of burnout and what recovery looks like. Please share if you know parents who might benefit.

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-teenagers-guide-to-burnout-finding-the-road-to-recovery-tickets-1125580003089?aff=erelexpmlt

(illustration by Eliza Fricker)

16/12/2024

This! ❤️

Why won't they open their presents?

No one thinks they will have a child who doesn’t want to open their presents - and who even when the paper is off, doesn’t open the boxes. No one thinks that they’ll be looking at last years’ gifts still sitting in a pile in the cupboard, as next Christmas is fast approaching.

It doesn’t seem to make sense.

Parents rarely talk about this because they don’t know what to say. Why don’t they want to open the games or read the books? Have we spoilt them? Are they entitled? Why aren’t they grateful?

A pile of presents can be overwhelming. Surprises are hard, other people’s expectations are hard, and unopened boxes are full of demands. Those gifts might be disappointing, not quite what they hoped for. They don’t know where to start - and so they don’t start at all.

Each gift represents uncertainty, and uncertainty is hard. It creates anxiety, and some children act to avoid that anxiety. So they say no. No to things they might enjoy. No to wrapped presents. And No to the new toys.

What can you do? Accept this is how things are right now, and that a pile of presents is too much. Open gifts as they arrive instead, or appoint yourself the official present opener. Pare it back so there isn’t too much new stuff at the same time. Be casual about new things and leave them around for them to try when they’re ready. Don’t build up the excitement, instead play it down. Reduce uncertainty wherever you can. If that means explanatory labels on the outsides of gifts, go for that.

It’s fine to celebrate Christmas through the whole month of December, a little each day, as and when you feel like it. Or to ignore the whole thing.
It isn’t because they are spoilt or you’ve done anything wrong. The expectations are just too much right now.

It won’t be like this for ever.

23/11/2024

Mindworks Surrey provides a dedicated out of hours helpline for parents and carers of children with suspected, or diagnosed, neurodevelopmental needs such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

It is free to call and open from 5pm-11pm, 7 days a week. The number to call is : 0300 222 5755

Our skilled and friendly advisers can talk carers and families through ways of calming down difficult situations and look at coping strategies.

23/11/2024

Here’s a good Disability Living Allowance tip for parent carers: call the DWP and ask for a posted form instead of completing it online or printing it out yourself! This way, the DLA form will be stamped with the date of your phone call — and any DLA your child gets will be paid from that date.

We all know how long and time-consuming the DLA form can be, so this handy trick will ensure you don’t miss out on any payments while you’re busy filling it in.

Find out more about DLA on our website: https://i.mtrbio.com/vrsrwznxzr

23/11/2024

Is your child saying they don't want to go to school? Or are you working with young people who have been called 'school refusers'?
Come to my pay-what-you-can talk on Sunday with Liberated Learners. Please share.

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/not-fine-at-school-lets-talk-about-school-avoidance-tickets-1048202029487

15/11/2024

When parents talk to me about how hard it is for them to leave the house, they are often tentative. ‘You won’t believe it’ they say, ‘But even when I try to just go to the local shop, it can trigger a meltdown. They bar the door. It is so hard that sometimes I just give up, and then I feel like I’m trapped. I drink my tea black because I can’t go two minutes to the corner shop for milk’.

I do believe it. Transitions are really hard for many autistic children, and a parent leaving the house is a transition. Just like a parent coming back into the house after a day at work, or a plumber arriving to mend the U-bend. It’s a change. It makes them feel uncomfortable and uncertain, and they don’t know how to manage that.

That’s why I wrote my new mini-course. Helping Your Autistic Child with Transitions. I’ll go into the different types of transitions, why they can be so hard and how you can make them easier on both yourself and your child.

We have been working around the clock to get it ready so that we can launch it TODAY - which means that it is half price until Sunday midnight, along with all my other mini-courses and recorded talks. Please share if you know parents who struggle with transitions.

https://courses.naomifisher.co.uk/offers/Zsdtfjk7/checkout