Ali Hay - Speech & Language Therapist

19/05/2026

I’m running the Scarborough Communication Club on Tuesday afternoon during the half term holiday. This is for children who are using - or who are considering using - Augmentative and Alternative Communication methods.

It’s a really informal session, with many communication opportunities and a range of play activities set out for the children. Families will be able to ask questions, look at resources and explore many options for introducing AAC to their child to support their developing communication skills.

This is a free session, open to anyone, and I know that all new families will be made very welcome by our existing families who attend.

Please feel free to message me if you have any questions about the session.

16/05/2026

If you need an advocate, Naomi is your woman! Get in touch with her and see how she can help you 💚

💜 Why do I believe I can support you?

Because I’m not speaking from theory alone.

I’m speaking from lived experience.

I have been:

👦 A boy mum
👧 A girl mum
♾️ A SEND mum
👶 A young mum
🌿 An older, wiser mum
👶👶 A twin mum
💔 A single mum
🏡 A mum within a family unit

I’ve experienced parenting in many different forms, through many different seasons of life.

And with that has come:

🕰️ Nearly 24 years of parenting experience
📚 Almost 15 years navigating the SEND system
⚖️ School appeals, EHCPs, benefits and social care battles
🧠 Personal experience of ADHD, neurodiversity and trauma
💜 Real understanding of caregiver burnout and nervous system overload
🫣Making many mistakes, but learning from each of them

Alongside my lived experience, I am continuing to build professional knowledge through formal study and training, including:

🎓 Children’s Mental Health
🧠 Neurodiversity Coaching
🌿 Trauma-Informed Coaching
💜 Nervous System Regulation

But the most important qualification I have?

I’ve lived it.

I know what it feels like to sit in meetings overwhelmed and unheard.

I know what it feels like to fight for your child while doubting yourself.

I know what it feels like to be exhausted, emotionally stretched, and still keep showing up.

And I know how powerful it is when someone says:

🤍 “I understand.”
🤍 “You’re not imagining it.”
🤍 “Let me help you.”

That is why I created The Advocacy Collective.

A place where parents and carers can find:

🛠️ Practical tools
📚 Clear information
💜 Emotional support
🌿 Zero judgement

Because sometimes you don’t need another professional who has read about it.

You need someone who has lived it.

And found a way through.

If you need support with anything advocacy-based, SEND-related, or simply need someone who genuinely understands the journey…

💌 Please reach out.

I’d love to see if I can help in any way.

💜

11/05/2026

⭐ We are holding an open day!! ⭐️

Friday 15th May.
You are invited to come and look around our new 0-2 provision based in Scarborough Town Centre!

⭐ We look forward to meeting you all ⭐️

10/05/2026

Other than a car and a house, this has to be the most expensive purchase I have ever made!!! 💰💰💰

The Clinical Evaluation of Language Fundamentals 5th Edition is something I have been wanting to buy for a long time, and I can’t wait to get to grips with it and start using it to assess my slightly older clients. I believe it will give me a much greater insight into the specific areas of linguistic challenges that some of my clients are experiencing, which will positively impact my therapeutic decisions.

Lots of bedtime reading to do first as I make my way through the manuals!!

09/05/2026

An interesting perspective

You think it’s about “not liking losing.”

It’s not.

For some autistic children, board games aren’t fun.

They’re overwhelming.

Because losing isn’t just
“oh well, better luck next time.”

It can feel like:
failure
injustice
loss of control
something going very wrong

All at once.

And when that feeling hits,
it doesn’t stay small.

It floods.

Through the chest.
The stomach.
The skin.

Losing isn’t small.
It’s a full-body experience — and it can feel terrifying.
So they do everything in their power
to deflect the dark cloud before it breaks over them.

So what do you see?

A meltdown.
Rules changing mid-game.
A child who has to win — at any cost.
Or a child who refuses to play at all.

And from the outside, it gets labelled as:

“They’re being a sore loser.”
“They need to learn.”
“They’re manipulating the game.”

But that’s not what’s happening.

This isn’t strategy.

It’s survival.

Because many autistic children experience the world through a need for predictability, fairness, and emotional safety.

And games?

Games are unpredictable.

Someone always loses.
Outcomes aren’t always fair in the way they expect.

That’s a lot to hold.

Especially when emotional regulation is already working overtime.

So sometimes they try to fix it.

Change the rules.
Control the outcome.
Avoid the loss.

Not to cheat.

But to make the experience feel safe enough to stay in.

That doesn’t mean we never teach flexibility
or how to cope with losing.

But if we start with:
“They just need to learn to lose”

we’ve already missed the point.

Because before a child can cope with losing,

they need to feel safe playing.

If this is your child, you’re not alone.

And if this isn’t your child —

it might change how you see the one it is.

If you know, you know.

🎲

05/05/2026

Sign up for Monday 9th 😊👍⚽️

02/05/2026

I wish society would stop seeing stimming as ‘weird’ or ‘quirky’. It’s a necessary regulation tool for so many people. And it isn’t just the stereotypical hand-flapping that’s portrayed in the media, it can actually be very subtle. If you do see someone stimming, don’t stare, just know that they are regulating themselves at that moment, and that’s a good thing 💜

Stimming isn’t weird. It’s regulation. 💜

Stimming (self-stimulatory behaviour) is the little things our bodies do to cope.

✨ To regulate
✨ To release
✨ To feel safe

And it’s not just autism.
It shows up in ADHD too…
and a lot of people don’t even realise they’re doing it.

When I got my ADHD diagnosis, I was told I sit on the borderline of autism too.
And honestly?
It made so much sense.

Because when I look at Georgie — diagnosed autistic — and I look at me…
Our stimming looks completely different.
But the reason behind it?
Exactly the same.

His biggest stim is rocking 🤍
That’s his body searching for feedback, for calm, for regulation.

Mine?
✨ Hair swirling
✨ “Grasshopper fingers”
✨ Air scribing
✨ Rocking side to side when I’m standing
(Which for me is also linked to POTS — my body trying to regulate in more ways than one 🧠)

Then one day I caught Chester air scribing…
Blew my mind, I thought it was just a weird thing I did.
We ended up talking about all the little things we both do without even thinking.
And do you know what?
Some of them matched.
That moment mattered. 💜

Chesters been accepted by CAMHS and is on the ADHD pathway…
And instead of seeing these things as “bad habits” or “behaviour”—
we understand them.

✨ How stimming can look in kids:
• rocking, bouncing, spinning
• hand flapping or finger flicking
• repeating sounds or words
• chewing, tapping, fidgeting

✨ How it can look in adults:
• playing with hair or nails
• leg bouncing or shifting weight
• doodling / air writing
• pacing or swaying
• repeating thoughts or phrases

Most of us stim.
We’ve just been taught to hide it.

But it’s not something to “stop”.
It’s something to understand.

Because stimming isn’t a problem.
It’s the body’s way of coping when things feel too much.

And when we understand that?

Everything shifts 💜

Do you stim and you didn't even realise it? 👇

02/05/2026

I made this game to support a few children who are working on their language development. It’s based on the idea of ‘Guess Who?’ and I use it to encourage children to listen to descriptions to find the right monster, and also to work on giving descriptions.

It’s really important for children to be able to give descriptions, so when you are talking to your child, get them to think about what things look like, feel like, sound like or how they move. Talk about what things are used for and what category they might come under. See if your child can think of other things in the same category.

01/05/2026

is great for children who have been identified as Gestalt Language Processors.

01/05/2026

Apraxia Awareness Month