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Tuesday 9am - 7pm Thursday 5pm - 8pm Friday 9am - 5pm

http://www.aparkertherapy.co.uk/

A Parker Therapy, York (2025)

09/01/2024

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Hello ❤️❤️⁣
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If you’re new around here, I’m Ashley 👋🏼⁣
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If you’ve been around a while and enjoying my posts and it’s resonating, here are some ways of working with me in 2024👇🏼⁣
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💥As an individual💥 £60⁣
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You don’t have to be in a romantic relationship to benefit. I am a family trained therapist and a specialist in relationships - if you’re alive, you’re in relationship with multiple people 😉⁣
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💞Couples Therapy💞 £70⁣
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This is where you get to come along together. There is sometimes a mix of couples and individual sessions to get the best of what you need. From a little relationship MOT to more fundamental issues - I’ve got you covered. ⁣
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🧐Couples Intensive🧐 £220 ⁣
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This is a 2 hour intensive session (normal therapy sessions are 50 mins) ⁣
There is a pre-session questionnaire to best ascertain what are the main areas of attention and post session evaluation and guidance. ⁣
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👨‍👩‍👧Co-Parenting Counselling👨‍👨‍👦⁣
(75 mins) £120⁣
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These sessions are ideal for couples who have finalised the other parts of separation but would like some support to co-parent in a healthy, collaborative way ❤️⁣
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I have a handful of spaces available for new clients during the day. If you’re curious, pop me a message and I’ll send over my calendar 📅 ⁣
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rocks

08/01/2024

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Same babes, same 🙋🏻‍♀️⁣
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I say it to my clients, I post about this regularly and yet, I fully bought in to “it will all be better for having a break”. ⁣
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When I say ‘it all’ that encompasses a lot! ⁣
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The fantasy of the kids having 2 weeks off and finding a renewed hope and joy for school (erm it has been at least 4 years…2 weeks wasn’t going to cure this). ⁣
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The hope that my husband and I would take the annual voucher we got for Christmas and not wait until November to use it for our anniversary 🫠(I know it’s only Jan, but that has happened twice). ⁣
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The images of days curled up under my new electric blanket (yes I’m a granny 👵🏼) reading my book; when in fact I’ve read the same pages at least 10 times over because I either nod off or am asked to get snacks 500 times. ⁣
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Of course I know a break has been good. ⁣
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I also know that amongst the mismatched imaginings, there has been plenty of glimmers. ⁣
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And safety which I have never felt more grateful for as I’ve watched the atrocities of Palestine continue on with no stoppage in sight 💔⁣
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I had ideas about today being kickstarted with a brisk walk and getting back to work properly - instead we are day 5 of a virus for the littlest Parker. ⁣
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But I wanted to show up here. And reassure you that if you’re disappointed , feeling fooled by the tinsel and glitter of the festivities; wanting to really get on top of the shizzle that’s weighing you down, I’m here. ⁣
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My diary is open with some space before 5pm on Tuesday & Fridays. ⁣
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I won’t make you believe that I have it all worked out because I don’t. But I do know that having the space and therapeutic tools, you can find your way out of this. ⁣
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Head to my website to submit an enquiry form ❤️⁣
Link is in the bio ❤️

rocks

01/01/2024

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It’s late in the day because I have had little to say…⁣
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But I do want to say thank you sincerely from the very bottom of my heart to my brave, wonderful, magic clients who have allowed me to walk the path with you. ⁣
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Personally I have had one of my hardest years and I didn’t exactly ring in the new year; but over the last few days I have reflected on all of the incredible people I have walked alongside and all of the joy that is available to me always, even when things are tough. ⁣
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The lessons I have learned, the laughter I’ve shared and at times even the tears…is never short of incredible. ⁣
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Thank you thank you and when I’ve had a little rest, I will be back here sharing my musings 💫⁣
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For now I wish you a magical time of reflection and ease as we move into another year. ⁣
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rocks

15/12/2023

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It’s completely understandable to feel overwhelmed with where to begin when your relationship is suffering. ⁣
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It makes sense that you might not see any other way once the anger has set in. ⁣
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But honestly the very best start is to ⁣
move back to basics. ⁣
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Start with hello! ⁣
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If you keep pulling away, ignoring each other, doing your all to avoid - things will only continue. ⁣
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But if you take a risk, take a step forward - the tone will change. ⁣
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One hello, leads to more hellos. Intentional effort and attention creates a ripple effect and it’s almost impossible to continue as you were. ⁣
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1. Stop what you’re doing when you come back together. ⁣
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2. Try to find some eye contact. This doesn’t need to be sustained, just enough to ensure the other sees you. ⁣
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3. “Hello! How are you?” ⁣
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4. Let this be an opportunity to sew the seed of your expectations. ⁣
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5. Is there something you’d like to talk about later? Is there something you’d like to do? ⁣
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6. Don’t wait for the other to just know. Be intentional in that moment with your attention, your curiosity and your expectations. ⁣
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6. If you have it in you to have a hug - do it. Not the quick tap on the back kind, but a longer one. Stand still and be held. Stand still and be willing to hold. ⁣
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See what happens next…⁣
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And if you’re desperate to make some changes in 2024 - get in touch early. ⁣
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January tends to be a busy old month for couples therapists…shock 😅⁣
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rocks

08/12/2023

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Lead the way; ⁣
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Show more of what you want to see. ⁣
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Preserve the energy you’re spending trying to make them more or less or better and be the things you want to feel. ⁣
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Take the lead. ⁣
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rocks

01/12/2023

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Full disclosure we dragged the decs out 2 weeks ago. I think it was an attempt to bring some cheer into the house. ⁣
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Life in this bubble is heavy and the world out there is impossible to comprehend right now. ⁣
I keep trying to find some words or to share my thoughts and they just fall too short. My thoughts don’t translate to these little squares. ⁣
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If you’re wondering how on earth you’ve arrived at the 1st December - you’re not alone.⁣
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My experience says that it can be a tricky time for lots of people for all sorts of reasons but I feel like more than ever I want people to make way for their differences. ⁣
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It’s okay for us to not agree on absolutely everything both in our relationships and in the wider context; ⁣
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Keep talking, remember to soften those edges when things feel prickly. ⁣
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Stop and pause amidst the frantic consuming and perhaps use the opportunity to imagine what you could do outside of the norm. ⁣
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And if you need some pre-Christmas support, get in touch. ⁣
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My intensives have £25 off this month and can be the perfect deep dive in to something that you’re struggling to navigate ❤️⁣
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rocks

23/11/2023

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We made it to 15 yesterday! ⁣
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We didn’t skip here or cruise gracefully, this year I feel like we skidded, crawled and smashed straight in to our 15th wedding anniversary. ⁣
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Why am I telling you? Because I feel like in an age of seeing the highlight reel of people’s lives, I want to be honest. ⁣
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This isn’t our first tough year. There have been others. ⁣
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But when I was writing the card yesterday I had to dig deep for highlights. ⁣
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This isn’t about a lack of love, there’s plenty. ⁣
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But life has been lifing. ⁣
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Parenthood has hit another level this year for us and I think our stores have been low. The Covid era kicked my ass - the seismic shift of a newish baby, moving work online and home schooling 2 children with no break from any of as a lot. ⁣
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Supporting others through the craziness of lockdown whilst trying to keep my s**t together was a lot. ⁣
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And I just think we’ve been doing a lot of survival mode stuff. ⁣
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So it was lovely to arrive at yesterday liking each other but acknowledging the toughness that can be marriage. ⁣
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15 years is crystal. ⁣
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I felt like it was a great representation for us. It’s tough, often flawed and beautiful. ⁣
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If you’re having a tough time or in unfamiliar territory, get support. ⁣
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There’s very little that’s natural about cohabiting with another harmoniously forever. ⁣
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I’m glad we still like each other and there’s a lot of love ❤️

rocks

19/11/2023

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As a mum of 3, I completely get the temptation to abandon all the things that bring you peace, well-being and care when the Christmas wishes come hard and fast.⁣
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Full disclosure, as I was hobbling to playgroup the other day a wonderful physio passed me just at the point that I winced as I stepped down. ⁣
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I saw her for 4 appointments a couple of years ago to tackle my muscle separation that I had ignored for at least 8 years. ⁣
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Unfortunately when I had my melanoma removed, I was not able to move my upper body so took a break. 2 years later…the break continues. ⁣
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I find myself low on the list frequently and it’s something I’m always trying to tackle. ⁣
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Healthy me = healthy human, wife, mum, friend etc. ⁣
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It’s tempting to let things go in lieu of Christmas. It’s a busy time and it’s easy to justify skipping sessions and even picking back up in the new year. ⁣
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But…I know enough about family dynamics, couples stressors and individual struggles to say that by denying those needs now you can end up in a much trickier position. ⁣
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January for therapists is busy! In the 13 years I have been doing this, the trend remains with the exception of covid times when it was just always busy 😞⁣
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And if a break is necessary, be intentional about booking your first appointment back. Back yourself for success ❤️⁣
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Intensives are getting a little sale too from now until December where you can save £25. ⁣
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Don’t hang on for Christmas or just deal with it in the new year if it’s something you can make some space for now ❤️⁣
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rocks

18/11/2023

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What a lovely message to wake up to on a Saturday morning 💫⁣
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It means a lot ❤️⁣
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rocks

07/11/2023

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Working with couples has meant I’ve witnessed a fair few break ups and let me tell you, it’s not easy. ⁣
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I’ve shed tears and at times wished I could convince them to stay together. ⁣
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But - that isn’t for me to decide, nor is it for me to share. ⁣
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What I have also witnessed is the desire to speed things up; to convince the other that it’s for the best. ⁣
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To wish that they could be on the same page. ⁣
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Of course if you’ve been contemplating ending things - you are more often than not ahead of your partner and their process. ⁣
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Grief takes time. ⁣
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The stages are necessary and will arrive in a chaotic way sometimes. ⁣
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You can’t wish your partner out of their feelings or convince them to see it your way, no matter how much it makes sense to you. ⁣
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If you need support, my intensive can help to process and make a plan. ⁣
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Message me ❤️

rocks

06/11/2023

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It may come as a surprise, but your clean sheet when it comes to no arguments may not be as good as you’ve both let yourself believe. ⁣
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For clarity, I’m not saying that unless you’re having blazing rows, things can’t be okay, but if you’ve never had any conflict, it would lead me to believe that perhaps you’re pushing your feelings down, are afraid of conflict or as the slide says…silently seething. ⁣
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Conflict is part of intimacy; and it’s pretty inevitable in a relationship. ⁣
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It also completely makes sense that you’ve been trying to work through things on your own. It’s not uncommon for couples to hold a belief that it should just be easy; you should be able to just work it out, but babes I’m here to free you of this belief - relationships are complex and therefore sometimes working through things is complex too 😉⁣
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Couples therapy isn’t just for crisis situations or when you are ready to call it a day, it’s for everything in between. ⁣
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I’ve seen couples 3 months in and 40 years in. Sometimes it becomes apparent that you can’t quite go it alone. ⁣⁣
My one piece of advice would be…check out people’s profiles/qualifications and ensure that for couples work you are choosing a couples therapist! It’s okay to ask what specific training a therapist has done. Working with couples is completely different to individuals! ⁣
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Feel free to message me if you’re not sure where to begin 💫

rocks

02/11/2023

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We are addicted to certainty and yet the early days of our relationships are fuelled by the chemical induced haze of lust and fantasy and certainty has very little to do with this stage. ⁣
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It’s tempting to defend our decisions with regret, but we can’t know what we don’t know. ⁣
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Many of my clients come to break their patterns though. ⁣
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So perhaps you see a trend; you notice a type?! ⁣
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Many of my couples identify things that have ‘just’ become a part of their relationship identity and they want to change this. ⁣
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It’s okay if you feel like you would have made a different decision about your partner or your relationship if you knew what you know now. But shaming yourself or each other with those regrets isn’t going to make you feel any less pain. ⁣
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Instead, get curious. ⁣
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Ask yourself and each other who you want to be in this relationship? ⁣
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What are the patterns that interrupt this for you? ⁣
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What would you need to learn more about to make changes to your relationship? ⁣
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What’s happening around you that influences the ‘US’ in the two of you? ⁣
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If you are ready to deep dive in, message me about working together ❤️⁣
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rocks

A Parker Therapy

09/01/2024

08/01/2024

01/01/2024

15/12/2023

08/12/2023

01/12/2023

23/11/2023

19/11/2023

18/11/2023

07/11/2023

06/11/2023

02/11/2023

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