South Tipperary Counselling and CBT

03/02/2026

One of the most powerful skills you can learn is letting go of what you can't control.

Other people's actions. Other people's feelings. The bad things that happen to you.
All outside your control.

You can't control if they leave. If they love you. If they understand you. You can't control traffic, illness, loss, or betrayal.

Stop exhausting yourself trying to control the uncontrollable. Control your response. Control your boundaries. Control your choices.
Let go of everything else.

22/12/2025

22/12/2025

Jung believed that the first half of life is largely devoted to building the ego through education work relationships and social roles.

During this phase people focus on adaptation to the outer world, establishing identity and meeting external expectations rather than understanding their deeper inner nature.

According to Jung real psychological development begins in midlife when the goals of youth lose their urgency. Around age 40 many people experience dissatisfaction anxiety or a sense of meaninglessness, what is now often called a midlife crisis. Jung did not see this as a failure but as a natural turning point. He believed this period forces individuals to turn inward and begin the process he called individuation, the integration of the unconscious with conscious life.

In this sense the earlier years are “research” because they provide raw experience. Success, mistakes, relationships, and suffering all supply the material needed for deeper self knowledge later on.

Jung warned that people who cling to youthful ambitions past midlife often stagnate psychologically while those who embrace inner development gain wisdom balance and a stronger sense of meaning.

17/12/2025

South Tipperary Counselling and CBT will be closed Saturday 20th of December until the 2nd of January.

I just want to wish everyone who has liked and shared my posts over the last year a very Happy Christmas! I especially want to thank my clients both past and present I hope you and all your families have a safe and happy Christmas 🎄🎄🎄

06/12/2025

Suffering doesn't come primarily from life's challenges. It comes from the solutions you created as a child that you're still using as an adult.

You learned to people-please to stay connected. Now you can't say no.
You learned to shut down your emotions to block out the chaos. Now you have trouble processing your feelings.
You learned to control everything to avoid feeling unsafe. Now you can't relax or trust.
You learned to suppress your needs so you wouldn't be a burden. Now you can't ask for help.
You learned to stay hypervigilant to stay safe. Now you can't find peace.

These weren't bad choices. They were your way of coping. They kept you sane during an insane time in your life.
But you're not in that environment anymore.
The strategies that protected you from the pain then are hurting you now. What saved you as a child is destroying you now as an adult.
To live a life worth living, you need to update your strategies or stay trapped using solutions that no longer fit the problem.

13/11/2025

Have you ever noticed how much of your self-worth has been tied to doing rather than being? If so, it's important to remember that the mind can never rest when it believes your value depends on constant activity.

Slow down. Breathe. Spend more time being. Less time doing.

12/11/2025

Not everyone can come with you.

When you evolve, some won't like it.
They'll judge you. Criticize you. Pull away.
Your transformation will remind them they're stuck. It will be easier for them to say you've changed for the worse than admit they haven't changed at all.
Your new boundaries will confuse them.
Your pursuit of peace will feel like rejection.
Your standards will offend them.
It's important to realise, self growth expands your life but shrinks your circle.

Not everyone can come with you.

11/11/2025

CBT rests on two simple ideas:

1) Keep thinking the same way, keep feeling the same way.

2) Keep doing the same things, keep getting the same results.

Want different outcomes? Change your thoughts. Change your actions.

07/11/2025

Our friendships in adulthood require patience.

Everyone is busy. Jobs. Kids. Family issues. Problems you don't see.

Some people are growing fast. Some are stuck repeating the same old patterns.

Less communication doesn't mean they don't care. Everyone's on a different timeline. Some heal in months, others can take years.

Don't take a period of silence personally. Check in, don't check out.

07/11/2025

Your life is the product of your attention.

Eight hours scrolling gets you an empty mind.

Eight hours creating gets you a meaningful life.

Where your attention goes, your life follows.

04/11/2025

My work with young men centers on a choice: Big Man or Good Man.

The Big Man is arrogant, brash, cruel, egocentric. Loud. Aggressive. Demands respect.

The Good Man is strong, protective, virtuous. Calm. Controlled. Earns respect.

Many young men think the Good Man is weak. They're wrong.

The Big Man is inflexible. He's performing to protect the vulnerable child inside. His cruelty compensates for insecurity.

The Good Man is secure. He cares for his family. Protects those weaker than him. Treats people with respect.

Andrew Tate vs Paul O'Connell? Conor McGregor vs Jocko Willink?

Strength isn't being the loudest or most aggressive. It's being controlled, protective, virtuous.

Choose the Good Man. The Big Man is just a scared boy pretending.

04/11/2025

When you exercise, you stress your muscles so they grow back stronger. This discomfort is necessary for growth.

Emotional discomfort works the same way. It's the stimulus your resilience needs to grow.

Stop avoiding what hurts emotionally. Face it. Approach it.

Do the hard things. Seek discomfort, not comfort.

Your strength, both physical and emotional comes from what you're willing to endure.