08/11/2020
The way out of pain that I work with happens from bottom up. Body to mind.
You know the reason why i started yoga? Partly because i suddenly got really interested in the pineal gland and all the knowledge from ancient history in 2014.
The meditation did something to me though, I started noticing pain that I was not prepared to see.
I did not know what was happening. I went to therapy and talking didn’t seem to help, antidepressants got me to be able to do daily tasks again but they did not give me full joy and i still had panic attacks.
The feeling was empty and confusing. I felt alone and as a prisoner in myself to say the least, i wished i could just go out from ME.
If you have experienced these kinds of states. Maybe you cannot stop eating or using a drug, thinking ”I will stop after this time”, when after that high of food, or after the drug is over, you seem to need it again.
This is ABSOLUTELY NORMAL. This is GREAT actually. Your amazing brain tries to regulate your mood so that you can feel happy. Because peace, joy, happiness: these are feelings that everyone wants to have right?
I hear you and i see you! Most of us have coping mechanisms to pain that we have literally swallowed or shut down, because when the painful moment happened we could not cope with it.
We then create:
1) panic attacks (a warning that something dangerous is happening) 2) anxiety (also a warning of danger) 3) overworking (coping to feelings of not being enough) 4) depression (depressed emotions) 5) addictions (to regulate the nervous system, self soothing, to feel good away from the subconsious pain).
I feel you whole heartedly if you have gone through or are going through any addiction, or state of panic, depression.
I know the feeling when you suddenly freeze in a public place, and start to sweat, can’t look people in the eyes and just feel that you want to DISCONNECT from your MIND.
Feeling of ”everyone is looking at me”. Feeling of being scared to go outside.
Feeling of not being a good human worth living.
Your opinions, deep rooted thought patterns sprout from seeds planted at some point within your first seven years.
So these feelings of yours are actually not yours they have been planted in you from a very young age. Your brain had most brain placticity going on at that time and your brain learnt patterns that are not the best for you.
But i can assure you there IS a way out!! I started the journey of inner work to get a life of joy and happiness. I went to many yoga retreats, meditation schools, attended seminars, read books, got certified after realizing how important and great this would be for many sisters and brothers.
After realizing that only meditation&yoga and talking will not get my addictions away, because i was still numb, i could not feel my feelings. And my unhealthy part of me wanted to drag me back to binge eating and substanses.
I got into bodily healing. To get in contact with that root emotion. The root of the evil so to say. To feel this in a safe way and to transmute it.
This is very important to our connection out of addictions and states of dispair i learnt.
There is a long scientific explanation of our cells and glands and how they communicate witg the brain. Thus making new neural pathways.
I go into that some other time.
But in all simplicity to tap into a ”higher-self” or an observing perspective, we must first GET INTO OUR BODY, to tell ourseleves that we will feel, to create a safe enviroment to feel the root cause of the pain.
This is somatic healing that i have used to heal addictions, panic attacks and depression.
We need to create highvibrational energy (chi,prana, which can be transmuted from sexual energy) to create a physical, mental, and emotional alignment thus getting in touch with real empathy and real love (not from the old thinking and reaction patterns of the nervous system), from the body because we are full body beings, this has been proven from ancient history since long, and now our science is coming to this conclusion as well (wohhooo🥳).
So to get this 5th dimensional energy (goes into quantum physics) that expands our consious awareness and creates a new peaceful enviroment for our nervous system, is by transmuting sexual energy, from our sexual organs, and glands, to our mind and transforming low, vibrating, dense emotional energy, into higher vibrations.
The aim is to get in contact with our feelings again, to feel the feels. And a place where we release and transform, physical, mental and, emotional pain, through pleasure! MEGA WOOOHOOOOO🥳🥳🤩🤩😍😍😍😍
This was the last step in my transformation and i thank Goddess everyday that she led me to this path... there is a way to love and union with life and yourself and this is the work I whole heartedly want to share with you.
And i want to let you know that you are not alone. Help is here and there is a way to peace n joy.
Sending lots and lots of love and sparkling starstruck joy to you!!
Happy sunday
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
