
26/06/2023
Can Math help you build better relationships?
Here's my perspective on the most important equation for adult relationships:
Relationship Capital = Investment - Expectation
Case-in-point:
Avi and Bunny's argument in Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani
Avi says, "Tu bhool gaya hume Bunny"
Bunny says, "Yaar Avi thoda chill kar. Mein uljha tha waha, mujhe apni life set karni thi"
When we love and care for someone, and they feel the same way, we end up spending a lot of time with them, and slowly but surely, we become habituated to them.
Every relationship ultimately ends up becoming a habit, but when it does, it's important to not take things for granted.
However, it's also important to have realistic expectations for what role the relationship plays in your life. If not controlled, it can cause resentment.
Bunny took friendship for granted and didn't invest time or energy in maintaining it.
Avi had unrealistic expectations and hence felt incomplete without the friendship.
However, Aditi's friendship with Bunny never suffered, simply cause she didn't expect too much from him in the first place.
Simple math suggests that when expectations are high and investment is low, resentment, guilt and anger are inevitable.
PS: There are 6 more such lessons that YJHD can teach you, check out my youtube channel for the full video. (link in bio)