Scott Smith LCSW

20/11/2025

19/11/2025

A combination of confusion, contradiction and loneliness – when Sam finally meets some of his online friends in the flesh, his joy is heartbreaking – suffuses every interaction James has with these young men. It is clear that none of them are evil or anything close to it. But they are adrift in a world that is changing in ways it is easy for them to believe are not for the better, and vulnerable to predators. They may not be being groomed by more powerful men for s*xual reasons, but there are plenty of other types of exploitation, many of which make them even more of a potential threat to others’ happiness and safety than they are to their own.

Mortified documentarian James Blake meets young men who have drifted towards misogynist influencers – and finds them lonely, heartbreaking and on ‘semen retention journeys’ to control their s*x drives

17/11/2025

“Some of us don’t understand what it is inside us that means we cannot be in the outside world, or be with other people, in an ordinary way. We haven’t yet worked through whatever traumas or unconscious conflicts keep us trapped in the past. We don’t have the capacity to digest our own feelings, so we cannot bear, never mind relate to, the feelings of others. Sometimes, if we cannot tolerate whatever emotions spontaneously develop within us, we fend off these feelings with screens or drugs or s*x or gambling or other self-harm, or work or sabotaging work or abuse of loved ones, and things get far more dangerous.

“Without psychoanalytic help, many of us are stuck in our own ordinary and devastating narcissism, unable to relate to ourselves or to others in meaningful ways. If we are blind to what is going on inside, we can’t look outwards to find solace and meaning in community, in the natural world, in work and in love. Meaningful therapy doesn’t indulge narcissism; it lights the way out of it.”

Are you stuck in ordinary - but devastating - narcissism? There is a way out - Guardian Australia https://apple.news/ATM8dSWP6TrmYSBwosTnSqw

Meaningful therapy offers a path past our worst impulses. We should be fighting for it to be available for everyone

17/11/2025

17/11/2025

The results revealed distinct patterns for each type of narcissism. Grandiose narcissism was linked to a broad range of s*xual interests, including both conventional (“normophilic”) s*x and fantasies involving power and dominance. In contrast, malignant narcissism was the strongest predictor of non-normophilic fantasies and behaviors, particularly those involving power dynamics (sa**sm, submission, humiliation) and intrusion (e.g., voyeurism).

Crucially, the study found that vulnerable narcissism showed no significant association with any of the s*xual fantasies or behaviors measured.

Not all narcissists are alike when it comes to s*xuality. New research shows that while grandiose narcissism is tied to dominant fantasies, the insecure, vulnerable type is not.

16/11/2025

Researchers from the University of Toronto say that while education is crucial, it may also trigger a mistaken belief that common issues that young adults face, like tiredness and irritability, are the symptoms of ADHD.

How ADHD awareness could lead to a false self-diagnosis | The Independent

A new study has warned that without intervention, ADHD education could cause many young people to wrongly diagnose themselves

15/11/2025

Every false belief we discover is good, because it brings us that much closer to the truth.

Karl Popper, Science, & Pseudoscience: Crash Course Philosophy #8

The early 1900s was an amazing time for Western science, as Albert Einstein was developing his theories of relativity and psychology was born, as Sigmund Fre...

14/11/2025

The New Yorker

12/11/2025

You may have noticed that the distortions and false beliefs of others are quite apparent, but only if they differ from our own. When they fall beneath the shadow of our own beliefs they magically morph from naive biases into obvious facts. This is a handicap from which all humans suffer.

Louis Cozolino, The Development of a Therapist

10/11/2025

“The next zeitgeist may ask us not what happened to us—but what we will make happen, together. Or maybe — in a darker scenario — with the advent of super-intelligence we will have less agency, less empowerment. Either way, I sense that this era - when psychiatric labels have become common terms for distress and trauma has become the explanation for our ills - will soon be coming to a close.”

https://open.substack.com/pub/thomasinsel352222/p/zeitgeist?selection=2cef4b94-784f-4512-bee8-60f81a2b87f2&r=32275k&utm_medium=ios

What Comes After the Trauma Era?

09/11/2025

Personality disorders, by contrast, are serious psychiatric conditions—not personality quirks or dating styles. They describe enduring patterns of thought and behavior so rigid that they cause dysfunction in nearly every area of life: work, friendships, intimacy, even a person’s sense of identity. Someone who holds down a steady job, maintains long-term relationships, and adapts to social expectations simply doesn’t meet the clinical criteria for a personality disorder. Yet online, these words get tossed around like shorthand for “someone who hurt me.”

The same happens with attachment styles. Finding out your “style” can be illuminating, but it can also become a trap. Instead of motivating change, it excuses stasis: “I’m anxious/avoidant, that’s just how I am.” What began as a framework for understanding has morphed into an identity that tells people not how to grow, but what to demand. “I have this” becomes “I can only be in a relationship that accommodates this.” It’s self-awareness turned self-entitlement, and it leaves no room for maturity, effort, or grace.

What began as a framework for understanding has morphed into an identity that tells people not how to grow, but what to demand.

https://open.substack.com/pub/eviemagazine/p/attachment-styles-how-a-childhood?selection=153d068a-d352-4453-b6cb-ce9866bbabad&r=32275k&utm_medium=ios

We used to say, “He’s just not that into you.” Now we say, “He’s avoidantly attached.”