17/11/2025
Latest Update to the Adjustment Guidance Blog: https://adjustmentguidance.com/living-with-high-functioning-anxiety-the-hidden-battle/
Struggling with anxiety is often a hidden battle. We often do a god job of hiding anxiety and looking like we have everything under control. We get up, go to work, meet deadlines, and keep our commitments. We smile, make small talk, and help others when they’re struggling. But inside, there’s a constant hum of worry. We don’t tell anyone about the tightness in our chest, muscle pain, sleepless nights, or racing mind that never seems to stop. We keep on functioning while anxious. We appear “fine” on the outside while managing a storm on the inside. Those who struggle with high-functioning anxiety often carry a heavy emotional load that others can’t see. The drive to perform well, to meet expectations, or to avoid disappointing others can mask deep feelings of fear and self-doubt. No-one knows that we are constantly replaying conversations, wondering if we said something wrong. That we feel tense, even in moments that we are supposed to be relaxing. That we are constantly overworking ourselves to prove our worth.
From the outside looking in, those with high functioning anxiety look organized and successful. Inside, they feel exhausted from the struggle to hold everything together with very little rest. Anxiety tricks us into believing that constant overthinking and overworking are the very things keeping us safe. The truth is this constant vigilance comes at a cost. The body stays in a state of alert, the nervous system rarely gets to rest, and the line between coping and burning out becomes dangerously thin. With managing functional anxiety, the goal isn’t to stop functioning but rather to learn how to function with more gentleness and awareness. By acknowledging that we are feeling anxious and anxiety is in the driver seat, we are taking the first step in changing our behaviors. Once we acknowledge that we are anxious, we can create space with de-escalation techniques. One helpful de-escalation technique is to take a break and ground ourselves. Once we are grounded, we can make a plan that increases our ability to feel safe.
Another helpful strategy is to let people in on how much we are struggling. While it may not be the best option to lean on co-workers, we can look for support from our intimate partner, family, or friends. Letting people in can give us a sounding board and extra support. Talking with a therapist or helpline can also give much needed support and an objective view of things that are causing anxiety. Objectivity and distance can really help when battling anxiety. Having an outside perspective helps us get out of our head and back into our body. Struggling with functional anxiety reflects a lot of mental strength. But that strength doesn’t have to come from pushing through pain. It can come from slowing down, setting boundaries, and allowing ourselves to be human. Everyone deserves to function from a place of calm and self-compassion. Everyone deserves to be treated kindly as we move through each day. We all deserve to be treated with compassion. This is especially true when talking about our internal lives and how we treat ourselves.
Struggling with anxiety is often a hidden battle. We often do a god job of hiding anxiety and looking like we have everything under control. We get up, go to work, meet deadlines, and keep our commitments. We smile, make small talk, and help others when they’re struggling. But inside, there’s a ...
