09/07/2025
People in relationships are different. They express care differently, process emotions in their own way, and respond to conflict based on who they are and what they’ve lived through.
It’s easy to label something a red flag when we’re looking at it through our own lens, shaped by our values, expectations, and experiences.
But often, things are more nuanced than that. What feels off at first might just be unfamiliar, not necessarily unsafe.
At the same time, what feels familiar, what we’ve always known or tolerated, might actually be unsafe.
Relationships take communication, curiosity, and a willingness to try and understand each other’s worldview.
That said, even difference of perspectives doesn’t mean we have to stay in constant tension. Sometimes it’s just not the right fit.
And at other times, the discomfort we’re feeling is pointing to something harmful, especially when certain behaviors are part of a larger pattern that includes disrespect, manipulation, gaslighting, or a refusal to take accountability.
The behavior on its own might seem small, but how it shows up, and how it affects you, matters. The goal isn’t to avoid difference, but to recognize when difference is being used to excuse harm.